Plastered Bastards

The Plastered Bastards story is a tale wrapped in intrigue and mystery. It all started with the movie "Beastmaster"(no really). Having conquered the world of "heavy rock" by the sword, the bastards could have sat on their thrones and gazed over the firery landscape and said "fuck it dude, I'm goin' to Vahalla or somethin" but FUCK NO DOG!!!!!, you ain't so fuckin lucky. They gathered their "steel" and other assorted weapons and raised them up to the Dark Lord and cried "Fuck You Too"! In a barren wasteland of fuckbags and "thrashers" or "punkers" and other stupid words dumbasses use to describe themselves( cause they are lame), the Bastards have destroyed their enemies with whiskey, weed and other ill shit! The landscape burns with evil and the rivers run red with blood! I think one of them is related to Vlad the Impaler( even though vampires are pussies). So remember when you bust out your "metal" Reeboks and Slayer vests, you are scum and we will crush you with our bad habits and stank. Know the "True" warriors of satanic rock , man, woman or child, will drink the blood of our enemies and make bongs from their skulls! Hail Satan baby jesus!!!!!!