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If you wanna be happy
For the rest of your life,
Never make a pretty woman your wife,
So from my personal point of view,
Get an ugly girl to marry you.
"theres no other place
that id rather be
than home in the Islands
in the middle of the sea.
keeping real close
to my family and friends
takin it easy
in the tropical breezes."
QUOTABLE QUOTES:
"my shit always works sometimes"
"everyone has a game plan till u get hit"
"if ur stupid, can not help" - Isaac W. Choy Sr.
"its never fuck me. its always fuck you" - Isaac W. Choy Sr.
"You can't fix stupid"
"Sometimes when the chemistry is right, things just flow."
"there's no points for second place." - Commander Mike "Viper" Metcalf. TOP GUN
"Almost only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades."
"Don't give up. Don't ever give up." - coach Jimmy V.
"Ride the mutha fucka till the wheels fall ofF. then weld it back up and ride it again"
"You are not promised tomorrow"
"Prepare for the worst and hope for the best"
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I..m not sure about the former." - Albert Einstein
"A good friend will come bail you out of jail................... but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, Damn we f*cked Up !!!"
"there are only two things that are definite....death and taxes"
THOUGHT OF THE DAY:
When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss. The brain said, "I should be boss because I control the whole body..s responses and functions."The feet said, "We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go."The hands said, "We should be the boss because we do all the work and earn all the money."And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs, and the eyes until finally the azzhole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the azzhole being the Boss. So the azzhole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered. Eventually they all decided that the azzhole should be the boss, so the motion was passed. All the other parts did all the work while the boss just sat and passed out the sh!t!Moral of the story: You don..t need brains to be a boss - any azzhole will do.
STORY TIME :
I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream!There was only one thing bothering me, quitemuch indeed, and that was my mother-in-law to be. She was a career woman, smart, but most of all beautiful and sexy, who sometimes flirted with me, which made me feel uncomfortable.One day she called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. So I went. She was alone, and when I arrived, she whispered to me, that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn..t overcome. So before I got married and committed my life to her daughter, she wanted to make love to me just once...What could I say? I was in total shock, and couldn..t say a word.So, she said, I ..ll go to the bedroom, and if you are up for it, just come and get me.I just watched her delicious behind as she went up the stairs.I stood there for a moment, and then turned around and went to the front door... I opened it, and stepped out of the house.Her husband was standing outside, and with tears in his eyes, hugged me and said, we are very happy and pleased, you have passed our little test. We couldn..t have asked for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.
Moral of the story:Always keep your condoms in your car......
Make your woman feel like a woman. Here's a tip!
On a recent transatlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm.The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning.One woman in particular loses it. Screaming, she stands up in the front of the plane. "I'm too young to die, " she wails. Then she yells, "Well, if I'm going to die, I want my lastminutes on earth to be memorable!Is there ANYONE on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN?" For a moment there is silence. Everyone has forgotten their own peril. They all stared, riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of the plane.Then an Italian man stands up in the rear of the plane. He is gorgeous: tall, well built, with dark brown hair and hazel eyes. He starts to walk slowly up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt..... one button at a time. ....... No one moves. .......He removes his shirt..... Muscles ripple across his chest.......Shegasps........He whispers: ......."Iron this, and get me something to eat...."