David

I did not write what you are reading. My friends turned this bio into a contest and you are reading the winner. What does this mean? This means that I have close friends that take pleasure in the possibility of finding humor in every area of my social life. I should cut to the chase. I don’t want to just list my details like a menu, cause this ain’t no buffet sister! Since I work in the film industry I figured I would finish the detail part of this bio as if it were a movie trailer. NOTE: You should read this part with the movie guys voice or it won’t really sound right. “In a world where evil reigns, where one man hated Wendy’s and drinking after people, he would search for a woman who could quench his desires. Desires to watch scary movies, take long walks in the park, watch more scary movies, find puppies and pet them, watch a great deal of Asian cinema, go sailing, listen to old hip-hop music, find kittens and pet them, eat anything with a jalapeño pepper on it, sitting through a woman reading a Cosmo quiz in an attempt to identify with the quiz in some faint manner, eat calzones, and wanting to do something out of the ordinary. In his quest to destroy evil, our hero would face several tests, tests that would push the limits of science and his sense of shyness. His journey would lead him to always tell the truth and value honesty above all else. As the world collapsed he would…” WAIT, this is really running on. I forgot about cutting to the chase. Okay, more personal information. NOTE: Play slow, sappy music over this part. I am not writing this, but it is being written for me because I am an amazing friend and I would make an even better mate. It’s that simple.----------OK, NOW FOR SOME STUFF I ACTUALLY WROTE. I haven't eaten a hot dog in 25 years. I've taught two filmmaking classes to at risk kids. It's nearly impossible for me to swallow pills. I hate spiders and heights. I want to go to Australia and get into a shark cage. I love thunderstorms. I only regret things I DIDN'T do. I can't play a single musical instrument. I stopped eating eggs when I heard someone refer to them as "liquid chickens". I'm a good listener. I've been to Europe twice. I haven't thrown up in over 15 years! I watched The Evil Dead when I was 13 and knew I wanted to make movies. I've been in love twice. I've been in lust many, many times.