GETTIN' READY FOR STREETLOW!!!CARRYING ON THE TRADITIONS THIS CHAPTER WAS FOUNDED ON!!!LAS CALAVERAS TATTOO'S "SCREWED, BBQ'ED & TATTOO'ED"
Heroes:
HOW ROCK-A-BILLY ARE YOU?I'm so rock-a-billy I brush my teeth with my wire brush after I cleaned my engine with it.I'm so rock-a-billy my cuffs have cuffs.I'm so rock-a-billy I have withdrawals without my grease.I'm so rock-a-billy when I moved to Mr. Rogers Neighborhood it became Mr. Rogers Hellbent Neighborhood.I'm so rock-a-billy when my friends call me they say "Hey what are ya doin'?" And I say "Oh, ya know, I'm being a rock-a-billy."I'm so rock-a-billy whenever I go to IN N OUT, I'm the coolest one there.I'm so rock-a-billy I spray paint my tires white cuz you can't have a rock-a-billy car without rock-a-billy whitewalls.I'm so rock-a-billy I piss on the trees next to the bathroom to show how rock-a-billy I am to the trees.I'm so rock-a-billy I bought a $2,100 Gretch like Brian Setzer, now I need to learn to play it.I'm so rock-a-billy my diapers had flames.I'm so rock-a-billy my mom's tattooed.I'm so rock-a-billy I have sparrow tattoos everywhere my muscles can move.I'm so rock-a-billy in preschool I stabbed my teacher with a switchblade and then combed my hair.I'm so rock-a-billy I chromed my baby shoes instead of bronzing them.I'm so rock-a-billy I joined a car club with no car.I'm so rock-a-billy I chopped and channeled my dad's 1995 Nissan Sentra.I'm so rock-a-billy I got a teardrop tattoo like Johnny Depp as Cry Baby.I'm so rock-a-billy I ask my grandpa how I can be cool.I'm so rock-a-billy I spray painted flames on an Amish buggie when I visited Pennsylvania.I'm so rock-a-billy people ask me to autograph their pictures of Johnny Bravo.I'm so rock-a-billy I carry my own dice just in case a game of rock-a-billy craps breaks out on my gang turf.I'm so rock-a-billy on every birthday cake I have has 16 candles.I'm so rock-a-billy whenever I bag on someone and make them feel stupid I say "SO THERE, SQUARE!" and then they shut up due to my rock-a-billyness.I'm so rock-a-billy when I got married, my tuxedo pants had a 5 inch cuff.I'm so rock-a-billy I hate swing.I'm so rock-a-billy I know Big Sandy...well everyone knows Big Sandy.I'm so rock-a-billy I have flames on my engineer boots.I'm so rock-a-billy my dad cut my "ace" comb in half when I was a kid so I could comb my pomp to the full effect.I'm so rock-a-billy I moon everybody whenever I'm the passenger in any automobile, whether it be a cop car or my grandmas 1984 Buick Skylark. (Grandma thinks I'm rock-a-billy when I do that).I'm so rock-a-billy I go as myself for Halloween.I'm so rock-a-billy I wear my Dickies jacket in the summertime.I'm so rock-a-billy my dick has sideburns!!!!
