Damon profile picture

Damon

teenage angst has paid off well...now i'm bored and old

About Me

If you must know anything about me: Know that i am FUN. People around me smile a lot. I'm a firm believer that your bad day will end as soon as you decide to stop having it.
Also:
My soul is pure because young children and animals love me. If I hold your baby or pet your dog, they will immediately stop bitching... If Quantum Leap were real, I'm pretty sure I would be able to see Ziggy. And if Haley Joel Osment was real, I'd be able to see Bruce Willis and Mischa Barton.
Things i love:
- Karaoke killed the cat...if you don't know, you betta ask somebody! (check top 8)
- Twilight Zone Marathons
- Lazy Sundays (preferably during football season)
- Pumpkin Pie
- dropping random gems of knowledge on you that blow your mind (i.e. physics aside...despite their respective names curveballs slide and sliders curve)
- Smoke Free bars and clubs (get a patch...)
- watching your jaw drop when i start belting out my favorite Natalie Imbruglia song
- confident people (if you don't think you're the shit, why should i?)
- 80's night
- knowing my worth (believe me, i'm worth it)

My Interests

Being young, single and healthy (not vegan healthy though, like working out healthy). Belvedere on the rocks.

I'd like to meet:

in order:
- Beautiful people (inside a must, outside is a bonus)
- Darryl Strawberry
- a girl who knows whether "Planet Telex" or "Airbag" is her favorite opening track on a Radiohead album (even though they're essentially the same song...discuss)
- someone with a segway who will let me ride it
- girls who will offer to buy the next round and really mean it
- people who have never uttered the phrase "bro, do you know where i'm from?" with the intention of intimidating
- people who have laughed at people who ask "bro, do you know where i'm from"
- people with couches in places far away from NYC
- girls who play bass guitar (marry me)
- people who used to be the fat kid in 3rd grade
- the cool kids in 3rd grade who made fun of you and are fat now
- People who do it either for the love or for the money... but NEVER for the love of the money
- a woman with a MILD emotional problem as opposed to a severe one
- The three geniuses of our modern time: Seth McFarlane, MF Doom and Larry David.
- a cuter mom than this: (notice we have the same smile and same crazy smirk like we just had strokes on the same side of our brains.)

Music:

Everything...even country...but specifically:
I know because of KRS-One, Weezer, White Stripes, Nirvana, Radiohead, Mobb Deep, NIN, Redman, QOTSA, Ghostface Killah, Cage, MF DOOM (best MC in NY right now), Kast, EPMD, most golden age rap (start with Kane), Public Enemy, The Cure, Nas (1994-6, 2003-), Slick Rick, Maroon 5 and Pat Benetar

Movies:

Wes Anderson flicks, Half Baked, New Jack City, Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle, Solarbabies, King of New York, Dolemite, 28 Days Later, Bad Santa, Big Trouble in Little China (son of a bitch must pay!) and E.T. still makes me cry

Television:

The L Word (Jennifer Beals did it for me at 8...and goddammit she's still doin it,) any HBO comedy series or documentary (Ummm Curb, Wire, Rome etc.) Sealab 2021, Arrested Development, LOST.... and there's no future for us if you can't appreciate the genius of Family Guy

Books:

Chicken Soup for the Angry Black Man (hitting bookselves in 2006,look for it!), On the Road, Frankenstein, Sesame Street's: There's a Monster at the End of this Book

Heroes:

Liz Sugarman's face and this guy...

My Blog

a note to the junkies who smashed my car window and stole my laptop

Thank you...The ultimate rush of vulnerability and terror knowing that you just made the busiest time in my life 1000 times harder...passed. Quickly.And when it was gone there was no hatred in its pla...
Posted by Damon on Fri, 15 Jun 2007 02:28:00 PST

Delta used to be my favorite

If someone's grandpa just died...and the viewing/funeral was the next day at 9am...and this person's flight was delayed because of weather but 3 alternate flights could get him in on time, I'm sa...
Posted by Damon on Fri, 20 Apr 2007 04:42:00 PST

My application email for World Series of Pop Culture

Just found this...couldn't follow through because I was a Viacom employee (lame)------------------------------------------------------ -----------------couple of short ancedotes:- Watching Monday Night...
Posted by Damon on Thu, 12 Apr 2007 09:53:00 PST

Happy Black History Quarter!

Fuck a month, I'm taking 3....Because Carl Weathers wipes his ass with Chuck Norris' birth certificate. ...
Posted by Damon on Sun, 11 Mar 2007 03:19:00 PST

don't you people have anything better to do?

Besides make me feel so damned LOVED!I love you all, thanks for the kind wishes...   -The old man.
Posted by Damon on Fri, 23 Feb 2007 10:35:00 PST

go america!

You all know me, but you may not realize I have a severe aversion to rules that make no fucking sense. So, I never put my liquids or gels in a ziplock bag at the airport. Fuck that, if it ain't hydro ...
Posted by Damon on Sun, 04 Feb 2007 02:03:00 PST

good day today

In an all day meeting where our college brand managers present programs they've run at their respective colleges. Fun productive day all around. Lunchtime, dueling pianist shows up and does some...
Posted by Damon on Sun, 28 Jan 2007 12:51:00 PST

I lied...

I told a waitress that I was a vegetarian. The order was fucked up, but I wanted to feel like less of a prick so I lied. But what a lie. For those joining us late, I sweat gravy. I ate steak for liter...
Posted by Damon on Thu, 25 Jan 2007 12:53:00 PST

Thank you MLK.

Because of you...black boys and white girls everywhere can hold hands. Thank you sir. I love tolerance.
Posted by Damon on Tue, 16 Jan 2007 10:48:00 PST

Guess what?

on a great redbull business meeting.buttttttttttt, in Seatttle....had a cop chastise me for jaywalking (for walking up to a cab to see if it was available...i didn't even cross the street) and then he...
Posted by Damon on Thu, 11 Jan 2007 01:38:00 PST