Emily Drive profile picture

Emily Drive

Haec Omnia Transeunt

About Me

Autodidactic Alienist, Genuine Charlatan, Mad Hatter, Professional Expert, Sometime Chef, Unrepentant Skeptic, Invested "Evolutionist" and Overall Marxist of the Groucho Variety.

My Interests

Being married, the deekiest of lorrrrrs. Also, retro-engineering Murder, Mayhem in the pursuit of truth and beauty. Stripes, snow globes, Yummy Things, Teuthology, Pilates, Good, clean fun fun fun, Psychopathology, Threat Assessment, Propaganda, History, Cherries, Law, Media, Aesthetics, Parenting, Hermeneutics, the Pathology of Theology, the Mendacity of "I.D.", Cathexes, Nuts of the Lloyd Pye Order of Absolute Nuttiness, My wonderful rocktastic husband, the Tiny King of Loaves, Anything with a hand-painted poster that says "ALIVE!!"

I'd like to meet:

My maker, just not anytime soon. I'd love to be standing next to Bin Ladin and Ahmedinejad when they walk in to heaven and find out the joint is full of Jews, then I could shake their hands and tell them that if they hadn't burned all the copies of Milton they'dve seen this coming.Also- Robert Ripley, Agent Cooper, PT Barnum, Vince Bugliosi, Race Bannon, Urban adventurers and anthropologists galore. Experts, Didates & Consultants

Music:

The good kind. Hum a few bars and I'll have an opinion, doubtless.

Movies:

Mostly the ones with sound, but not always.

Television:

We're a Nielsen Family!! WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I got paid (very, very little, admittedly) to sit and watch telly all this week...I had to promise the S.O. that I wouldn't watch any tabloid trash...I keep watching PBS, I'm very conciencious.Shows with murder, about murder, regarding murder...dig? Old reruns of The Simpsons, and some BBC ones they don't seem to have here and I don't know the names of anyway. Is it Real? is my new fave. I watch those Ira Einhorn docs over & over 'cause I just love to hate him SO MUCH!! All of Us. Friends. The Practice. All of Us. Roseanne. All of Us. Boston Legal. All of Us. Boston Legal. (Repeat as needed- if you know me, you know why)

Books:

If they wrote it, I'll read it, 'specially if they're Huxley, Vonnegut, Bulgakov, Alasdair Gray, Phillip K. Dick, or they used to work in a carnival or with criminals...preferably both. Also the Bible. Recently, even the Christian Bible. And TV says I should ask my Mormon neighbor for a copy of Joseph Smith's book, but I guess I took things for granted when I lived in Utah. Because I've yet to find a single Mormon neighbor since I moved.

Heroes:

Heroes? Yes!! Martyrs? No!!

My Blog

The mystery of Bam's staring issues, German cadaver art and other Chicago bites

Yes- Chicago doesn't suck. I never would have thought I'd be typing that, (without a gun to my head) but I'm afraid it's all true. Many interesting things can, and in fact do happen there, despite ...
Posted by Emily Drive on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Moving sucks more, by powers of ten

Absolutely! It just gets worse and worse and worser!! My ex-fiancee seemes more and more plausibly to be the living, breathing proof of my own insanity. i.e. If he was always like this, then how co...
Posted by Emily Drive on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

The Doctor is dead!! Long live...ME!!!

When I lived in an old farmhouse, built in 1742, with a several of the least sane culinary coworkers I've had the pleasure of doing time with, one of the proudest installations of our domicile was the...
Posted by Emily Drive on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Krackit To Ya! Sockitoa!! Point being; I should have my own religion by now.

Because- this place is supposed to be an utterly desolate, dessicated desert waste. Until I show up, that is. Today, as I drove California Highway 111, following the SO-CALLED "DESERT RANGE" of the Sa...
Posted by Emily Drive on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST