average bear profile picture

average bear

you fuckers are selfish.

About Me

I've been batting a thousand since I was eleven, but where there's an up, there's always a down. I am a good friend. I don't really enjoy talking about myself, but will if pressed. I spent my twenties travelling, moving and breathing in different environments. I brought Minnesota Nice to Brittania and returned with a love of Walker's Crisps and Norman Cook. I've stopped wearing a wrist watch lately and time has ceased being constant. The funny thing is, I somehow look at a clock almost every day at exactly 12:34. I love watching baseball on television. Not that I really do anymore, but it was always a great way to pass time. I have a dog named Jones. He has a seasonal wardrobe. I've had the good fortune of meeting a lot of amazing people along the way. Here's to them, they know who they are.

My Interests

Synesthesia. Bowling. Actually I'm not a bowler, but I'd like to be. Books. Scrabble. Friends. Helping others. The way babies look at me. When the second hand, minute hand, and hour hand align for a brief moment, twelve times a day. The crunch of snow under heavy boots. Looking at myself, upside down in a convex mirror. A 1965 Dodge Dart Convertible. The subtleties of life. Running my hand up an intricately carved bannister as I ascend a staircase. Felt pens. The sound of a deck of cards being shuffled. Protruding hip bones. Skipped rocks. Maps. The arrangement of letters on a keyboard. I am particular to 'xcvbn'. Pure drawn butter. The highlands of Scotland. A bird drinking from a spilt carton of egg nog days before Christmas. Chocolate covered raisins. Waves crashing. Pianos played.

I'd like to meet:

Tecumseh. Eunomia. Edward O. Wilson. Jim White. Jackie Robinson. Thomas Jefferson. Mitch Hedberg in the afterlife. Amadou & Miriam. Ani Difranco. General William Sherman. Roger Ebert. Various cereal related cartoon characters, including but not limited to: The Trix Rabbit, Smackie the Frog, the Lucky Charms Leprechaun, Count Chocula, Tony the Tiger. Definitely not the Honeycomb hedgehog or whatever it is.

Music:

Fleetwood Mac. Basement. Jaxx. Michael Jackson. Ali Farka Tour. AIH. Why?. Heart. Zap Mama. Groove Armada. Slayer.

Movies:

Lately, anything in the comedy genre. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Lost in translation. Little Miss Sunshine. Goodbye Lenin. The Royal Tenenbaums. Rushmore. Man in the Moon. SLC Punk. Uncle Buck. Documentaries of all shapes and sizes.

Television:

The Wire. Discovery Channel. Black Books.

Books:

The Zanzibar Chest. The Year of Magical Thinking. Consilience. The Future of Life. Under the Banner of Heaven. The Mystery of Capital. The Wealth of Nations. Hegemony or Survival. The Journals of Dan Eldon, The Journey is the Destination. Capital Losses. Maus. Collapse. Lonely Planet guidebooks.

Heroes:

My parents. Al Gore. Joan Didion. Eddie O. Crossing Guards. The charming gardeners of my soul. Jacques Brugnon. Gaspard-Gustave de Coriolis. Henri Jean Cochet. Hernando de Magallanes. Jean Borotra. Rene Lacoste. Whoever makes snow fall and sun shine.

My Blog

When I bite into a York Peppermint Patty...

sometimes I get the cooling sensation that all this candy I've been eating my whole life is going to rot my teeth and I'm going to end up like that dirty old man on Family Guy that tries to molest Chr...
Posted by average bear on Wed, 16 Jul 2008 10:25:00 PST

On Artomatic (Quickly)

Brock and I did an article on Artomatic.  Read it here... Artomatic Article Leave a comment after you read it!...
Posted by average bear on Thu, 12 Jun 2008 12:24:00 PST

On Aphex Twin

Everyone should have a favourite Aphex Twin video. Like a favourite color or a favorite Spice Girl (I like Scary). Now there are a lot of people who are going to come at me with Windowlicker. Yeah,...
Posted by average bear on Tue, 15 Jan 2008 09:59:00 PST

On Halloween Costumes

You just wish you would have thought of it first.  I'm going to be the same thing next year, just improve on it.  Get it down to a science.  Any girls out there want to go as my sexy 'w...
Posted by average bear on Thu, 01 Nov 2007 03:43:00 PST

Superman Dat Ho!

So I was flipping through the radio stations yesterday and I landed on some lame hip hop station. There was a song that I didn't really understand with some lyrics that said something about supermanni...
Posted by average bear on Wed, 24 Oct 2007 01:00:00 PST

Hey Lama, how about a little something, you know, for the effort.

I saw the Dalai Lama this weekend in New York.  Read about it here... Me and My Lama Lama Caddyshack Clip ...
Posted by average bear on Wed, 17 Oct 2007 01:32:00 PST

Jumping out of an Airplane.

Here's the scoop: Skydiving on BYT. ...
Posted by average bear on Wed, 26 Sep 2007 12:35:00 PST

Jones (updated).

What a great dog.  I remember whenever we'd go for a walk I'd always leave the door open, just a crack.  When we'd get in the hallway of my building, Jones would run at the door and do a div...
Posted by average bear on Tue, 28 Aug 2007 03:41:00 PST

Its not a party unless the neighbors complain

Friday:  party in a limo for Ashley May's 21st Birthday.  Happy Birthday, Ashley. Saturday: party at Michael's house with a Great Gatsby theme.  Sunday: party at my house.  It see...
Posted by average bear on Tue, 28 Aug 2007 09:41:00 PST

un(fair) treatment

In retrospect, I should have just walked the extra half mile, paid the seven bucks and joined the rest of our crew at the Demolition Derby.  Yet the fence was too low.  I haven't hopped over...
Posted by average bear on Tue, 21 Aug 2007 01:09:00 PST