machete profile picture

machete

Not everything is strippers and booze and buckets of blood.

About Me



Click Here For Myspace Layouts !
Or Get Myspace Comments Check out my greeting cards, buttons, t-shirts and other stuff at http://www.lemagasindesmorts.com "when there's no more room in Hell...the dead go shopping!"Graphic designer by day, dancer by night, psycho tous les jours. I love french things, karaoke, things involving blood and guts, and i could watch south park 24 hours a day and not get tired of it. I think that sums me up.When not watching south park or doing graphics, I love to dance! Do you need a burlesque performer for an event? contact me...

My Interests

Likes: dancing, arts and crafts, sewing, serial killers, toile, plaid, argyle, french country decor, mice, violent movies, nerds, lilly pulitzer, pirates, decorating christmas trees, crispin glover, south park, coke zero, rice pilaf from Jimmy's, karaoke, going to musicals, being in musicals, pink (the color), vivienne westwood, offensive humor, zombies (but who doesn't like zombies?), graphic design, squirrel humor, weapons, hello kitty, home goods...Dislikes: split levels, facial hair or long hair on guys (unless you are the Highlander), chick flicks, non-nerdy guys, coconut, julia roberts, pickles, sports, the outdoors--especially the beach, physical humor, when people sing billy joel songs at karaoke, my peach bathroom, dirty hippies, horses, forrest gump Your Language Arts Grade: 100%

Way to go! You know not to trust the MS Grammar Check and you know "no" from "know." Now, go forth and spread the good word (or at least, the proper use of apostrophes).

Are You Gooder at Grammar?
Make a Quiz

Music:

.. width="425" height="350" ..There's no reason to listen to any artist other than the man known as George... Take the quiz:
What Musical Are You?

A Chorus Line
You're A Chorus Line! You're wild, kinky, and love dance. Music is your life. You've had a dramatic past, but then again, who hasn't?

Quizzes by myYearbook.com -- the World's Biggest Yearbook!

Movies:

Fight Club, Bad Santa, American Psycho, Pirates of the Caribbean, Hedwig and the Angry Inch, Revenge of the Nerds, Bride of Chucky, Rush Hour

Television:

South Park, the Soup, Arrested Development, whatever is on HGTV or CourtTV, Blackadder, Strangers with Candy

Heroes:

Tyler Durden

My Blog

Go to HELL to see ME and Hemlok, Sept 19, Providence

Hemlok. Machete. Both can be lethal...and both of us can be seen at CLUB HELL September, 19 2007! 180 Richmond ST, Providence, Rhode Island 9:00pmCost : $5 If you haven't seen me perform b...
Posted by machete on Fri, 07 Sep 2007 02:29:00 PST

Queen for my (and Freddie’s) b-day Sept 5 in JP

Wednesday (sept 5) is my b-day. It is also Bob Newhart, Rose McGowan and Freddie Mercury's birthdays!  ..:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /> To celebrate ...
Posted by machete on Tue, 04 Sep 2007 04:29:00 PST

Come see me FRIDAY NIGHT (August 17) at CONEY ISLAND, NYC!!!

Come to Coney island on friday, august 17th to see me! and go on rides at Astroland before it closes! August 17, 2007 - JT and Cockabilly Records Present Cha Cha's on the Boardwalk's Big Burlesque Blo...
Posted by machete on Wed, 15 Aug 2007 03:42:00 PST

Friday, Aug 3rd...just when you thought it was safe to go back in the woods...

CAMP STEAMY JERKUS CIRCUS!!! I will be performing two--yes, TWO!--fabulous numbers in this show, so it is not to be missed...one includes a weapon (as did my last dance, come to think of it...but THIS...
Posted by machete on Tue, 31 Jul 2007 07:40:00 PST

Help bring happiness back into the heart of this little girl!

As many of you who know me know, not many things can bring a smile to my face (which is why I am often compared to Wednesday Addams).  A few of those things are squirrels, cutting people's faces ...
Posted by machete on Tue, 24 Jul 2007 03:17:00 PST

Next weekend! Jerkus Circus AND Cheap Thrills a Go Go!

Come see me next weekend, either at Jerkus Circus at Ralph's Diner in Worcester, MA on FRIDAY NIGHT (pirates!!!) or go-go dancing at Cheap Thrills A Go Go (no pirates) on Saturday night at the&n...
Posted by machete on Sun, 15 Jul 2007 03:28:00 PST

TraniWreck: Drag, Dissent and Decadence (and girls named after weapons)!

TraniWreck Returns July 8! Drag, Dissent and Decadence Sunday July 8, 2007 8pmTraniWreck: Drag, Dissent and Decadenceour Independence Day CelebrationThe Milky Way Lounge and Lanes 405 Centre Street ...
Posted by machete on Wed, 27 Jun 2007 03:47:00 PST

Come see me at Taste o' Burlesque July 3!

Come see me at Taste o' Burlesque on July 3rd at the Lucky Dog in Worcester, MA.   Dancing starts at 9:00. It's $8 cover, but bring more for tips!!! http://www.luckydogmusic.com/ I was going...
Posted by machete on Wed, 27 Jun 2007 03:36:00 PST

Come draw me at Dr. Sketchy's July 8th at Great Scott

Come see me model! I will have fabulous and bizarre costumes! Sunday July 8, 2007 2:30pmDr. Sketchy's Anti-Art School Cabaret Life Drawing ClassGreat Scott1222 Commonwealth Ave (corner of Harvard and ...
Posted by machete on Sat, 23 Jun 2007 05:11:00 PST

My Celebrity Look-alikes: i am a gilmore girl, i guess

I guess these folks really think i look like Alexis Bledel since I got her from both photos...either way, this was a great self-esteem boosting timekiller since i got matched up with a bunc...
Posted by machete on Mon, 04 Jun 2007 02:33:00 PST