Randy (Lamb of God) and Matt (Trivium) and also Lee Evans and Jimi Carr...
THERES SOMETHINGS THAT WE WILL LEARN THAT CAN NEVER BE CHANGED
- Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but set him on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life...
- Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car...
- It's your god. They're your rules. *You* go to hell...
- War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left...
- I once prayed to god for a bike, but quickly found out he didnt work that way...so I stole a bike and prayed for his forgiveness...
- If pro is opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress?
- My god carries a hammer. Your god died nailed to a tree. Any questions?
- Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them...
- If you think things can't get worse it's probably only because you lack sufficient imagination...
12. A train station is where the train stops. A bus station is where the bus stops. On my desk, I have a work station...
- You can't be late until you show up...
- Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up...
- Knowledge is realizing that the street is one-way, wisdom is looking both directions anyway...
- Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian...
- The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources...
- Books have knowledge, knowledge is power, power corrupts, corruption is a crime, and crime doesn't pay..so if you keep reading, you'll go broke...
- A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic...
- Optimism: Waiting for a ship to come in when you haven't sent one out...
- Never interrupt your opponent while he's making a mistake...
- You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard...
- Evolutionists have proof without any certainty. Creationists have certainty without any proof...
- You never learn anything by doing it right...
- Friendships last when each friend thinks he has a slight superiority over the other...
- I come from a small town whose population never changed. Each time a woman got pregnant, someone left town...
- It may look like I'm doing nothing, but I'm actively waiting for my problems to go away...
- It only takes 20 years for a liberal to become a conservative without changing a single idea...
- Anyone who uses the phrase "easy as taking candy from a baby" has never tried taking candy from a baby...
- The shortest distance between two points is under construction...
- Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing...
- Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place...
- Confessions may be good for the soul, but they are bad for the reputation...
- If the grass is greener on the other side, you can bet the water bill is higher...
- An American's a person who isn't afraid to criticize the president but is always polite to traffic cops...
- In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him...
- It's amazing how nice people are to you when they know you're going away...
- I am erotic. You are kinky. They are perverts. We protect. Our allies enforce. Our enemies oppress. Congress appropriates. Microsoft lobbies. Citizens steal...
- Suicide is the most sincere form of self-criticism...
- Love is staying up all night with a sick child, or a healthy adult...
- The old believe everything, the middle- aged suspect everything, the young know everything...
- Delusions are often functional. A mother's opinions about her children's beauty, intelligence, goodness, et cetera ad nauseam, keep her from drowning them at birth...
- To appreciate heaven well, it's good for a person to have some fifteen minutes of hell...
- Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed...
- You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
Yo momma so fat her nickname is "damn"...
Yo momma so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept...
Yo momma so poor burglars break into her home and leave money...
Yo momma like a vacuum cleaner she sucks, slurps than gets laid in the closet...
Yo mamma so stupid she tired to put "m and m's" in alphabetical order...
yo mamma so poor you walk in her front door and trip over her back fence...
Yo momma so poor that your family ate Cornflakes with a fork to save milk...
Yo momma so stupid when I asked her to purchase me a color TV she asked me "Which color"...
Yo mamma so nasty she takes crabs to the beach...
Yo momma so poor she hangs the toilet paper out to dry...
Yo momma so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out...
Yo momma so stupid I told her drinks were on the house so she went and got a ladder...
Yo momma so stupid she asked you "What is the number for 911" ...
Yo mamma so stupid she though that quaterbacks were a refund...
Adema - Do You Hear Me
Adema - Los Angeles
August Burns Red - Redemption
August Burns Red - Composure
Avril Lavigne - Slipped Away
Despised Icon - Furtive Monolgue
Eminem - Sing For The Moment
Lamb Of God- Forgotten (Lost Angels)
Necrophagist - Stabwound
Trivium - My Hatred