Liz smiles n lives lucid - ProfilesArchive

About Me

[IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v89/lizzieloocid/DSC0 3701.jpg[/IMG] I don't know what you'd think of me if you really knew me (and some of you do) but there seems to be this general misconception that I'm consistently sad. I've faced a lot of loss recently, close friends that simply died because of terrible circumstances...so this has put me in a place where I'm inwardly very guarded. I do happen to be rather outgoing and am told that I'm good with people, but rarely do I share much of myself. I write. I don't ever say that I'm a writer because that sometimes leads people to think that I'm an author by trade. I'm not. I've been published in several magazines and anthologies but I certainly don't make a living of it. I work at Starbucks as an assistant manager in the busiest store in Jersey. It's hectic and crazy and I often find that it suites me, though I rarely admit it. But anyway, I write. More and more often lately. I carry notebooks in my car. Every scrap peice of paper in my car has become a template for my often scattered ponderings. I've recently discovered what I truly want from my life in the next few years and I've been taking steps to make a concerted effort to attain them. I've slowly become less sad and more even and traquil. I love to observe and watch the world around me because it's simply incredible that each person is so UNIQUE but we are a human race with the same end goal, to procreate and perpetuate the species. Our behaviors are repetitive and always evolving.Instinct. I believe in intuition and instict rather than religion. Why should some man assign my faith? Why must I conform and follow the same rules as these congregations? This is not worship, those types of mental restraints are sadistic. I believe that the earth is so incredibly special that time could begin with it's presence. Our eco-system is so terribly fragile and complete and yet we destroy it with our need for lives of luxury. That's where my faith truly is. Maybe it makes me sound like a hippie...but can't you see this delicate planet is it's own miracle? Not acklowledging it is almost disrespectful to yourselves since you're part of it. Anyway, I'm getting really off track. The whole point of this was that I wanted to get a fresh crack at my "about me" section because my life is going under major construction involving a new home and new life. I'm good.

My Interests

guitars and cigarettes*laying about*the right music makes me cum*writing bad poetry*enjoying the company of a certain 5 year old*sometimes photography*not getting killed*singing*playing guitar (in private as to not bother anyone)*singing*giggling uncontrollably with mr. steve dumas and company*finding my way out of raging black holes*journaling*people with really blue eyes. i love your blue eyes*collecting t-shirts*smoking (it's cool and u know it!)*text messaging*protesting against things that i truly believe are wrong (ahem...war in iraq)*cats*hacky sack (setimental throw back)*driving around aimlessly*overthinking things* the village at 2am, smoke shops, hanging with the boys, did i mention laying about?

I'd like to meet:

Anyone who can put up with my residual teenage angst....and....Sideshow [email protected]
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Music:

occasionally soft and sweet. mostly hard and fast. I'm basically still stuck in the early 90's when it comes to music. im a grunge addict. civ, violet cage, lucid-a, r.e.m, nirvana, pegleg, mudhoney, tori amos, fiona apple, kt tunstall, THE WHO, sex pistols, pearl jam, old school butthole surfers, the melvins, ani d'franko, porno for pyros, Live, FLAW, joni mitchell, the offspring, Hole, nin, janes addiction, cat stevens, springsteen, Ella Fitzgerald......and the sound of tempered glass breaking....

Movies:

anything witty or political. Monty Python's Search for the Holy Grail,Michael Moore flicks (ROGER AND ME, BOWLING FOR COLUMBINE, THE BIG ONE, 911) Waynes World is in the top ten, Saving Silverman, Office Space, Austin Powers, Spaceballs, Blazing Saddles, Robin Hood Men in Tights, Princess Bride, One Flew Over the Cukoos Nest, Raging Bull, Scarface, Anything with Leslie Neilsen, Rocky Horror, The Elf, Ghostbusters, Army of Darkness,Some Like it Hot, Singing in the Rain, M, The Rope, Being There, ALL the Pink Panther flicks (Peter Sellars is a GOD), Psycho (the original, sorry vince vaughn), Anything with Crispin Glover, Unforgiven...so many. i wont even get started on all my favorite indie films...well maybe a little...The Tic Code, My Life Without Me, ect. but excuse me...what's the big deal about Lost In Translation???

Television:

The Awful Truth, Fawlty Towers, The Tom Green Show (the original), Law and Order, The West Wing, Crank Yankers, Who's Line Is It Anyway?, That 70's Show, The Daily Show, Real Time with Bill Maher...did I mention Fawlty Towers?...and THE AWFUL TRUTH which got cancelled by every network it was on cause Michael Moore is so fucking cool that he doesn't give a FUCK about pissing off his sponsors...i own em all on dvd anyway so i can watch em whenever i want. take that corporate america. suck my clit.

Books:

You are Being Lied To, Everything You Know Is Wrong, The Ralph Nader Reader, When You Ride Alone You Ride With Bin Laden, The Indespensible Chomsky, Abuse Your Illusions, Derailing Democracy, The Great Unraveling, anything Ginsberg. The Far Side, Calvin and Hobbes, Weird NJ, Heavier than Heaven...and im addicted to unauthorized biographies of random people. And magazines...i love magazines...doesn't matter what magazine (tho my favorite has always been The New Yorker). I'm constantly sitting in waiting rooms of doctors offices or the like so i find myself reading a lot of crap...i used to read the sunday paper front to back every week, but i barely have time to read the headlines now.

Heroes:

Anyone who excersizes their right to vote, one djf, the guy who invented post its-cause i swear to you, i use them EVERY damn day, my biological mother, anyone who plays a musical instrument. anyone who rocks hard. anyone who can deal with me. cause i know it's hard. and i love you for it.**my daughter...cause she smiles for no reason and that's the most admirable thing in the world cause it's the hardest thing to do, and most importantly, Dane Cook. SUFI!!

My Blog

love/lost/find/expel.......

lately, been feeling that itch to up and disappear. really go far cuz maybe it aint happenin in jurz. course, i love it here but i can't seem to feel settled right now.i'm kinda in this limbo stage......
Posted by Liz smiles n lives lucid on Thu, 07 Jun 2007 06:16:00 PST

relieving nothing

it's all been in hyperdrive lately...not sleeping, working too hard, and smoking too hard. all these things that make me numb leave me completely washed out. i've been trying to come out of my cyclica...
Posted by Liz smiles n lives lucid on Fri, 16 Feb 2007 12:26:00 PST

loyal subjects

staved off thoughts that tend to entangle my brain to surrender my smile to you.i've disappeared too much in these seconds. i've breathed (then been breathless) between your words. and we can't help b...
Posted by Liz smiles n lives lucid on Tue, 02 Jan 2007 05:32:00 PST

this thought is over now.

though i'm always uncertain in my footing, it wasn't much concern of yours as you descended down my stairway., (dark and unclear of a destination). i would never have asked you to stay if i hadn't bee...
Posted by Liz smiles n lives lucid on Wed, 13 Dec 2006 12:51:00 PST

head on collision

head on collision your speed was intense as you swept me up into your crash (flat and scared to walk). i've poured myself from this car before...yet never lacked my livelihood when i needed stone...
Posted by Liz smiles n lives lucid on Mon, 11 Dec 2006 02:40:00 PST

if i was an African American peacemaker (in america)

i had a dream of likeness to your own. you had shared with me upon slipping back into your slumber. lead me to acknowledge the impact you've made in my existence. tender pressure from your gentle hand...
Posted by Liz smiles n lives lucid on Wed, 06 Dec 2006 06:29:00 PST

a whole heap o' nothin.

It's been a week now since I made my TRUE decision to end my marriage. I'd been wavering for a few months, really thinking about it. Thinking about the ramifications for Doris and what the c...
Posted by Liz smiles n lives lucid on Mon, 23 Oct 2006 01:45:00 PST

got my ass handed to me out there...

so i decided that i was gonna come home and go to sleep after work this morning, but after an impromtu boxing lesson from one of my baristas, i was all energetic and decided that i would come home, ge...
Posted by Liz smiles n lives lucid on Wed, 11 Oct 2006 04:53:00 PST

i lost my keys. it SUCKS.

i lost my keys.
Posted by Liz smiles n lives lucid on Mon, 02 Oct 2006 06:17:00 PST

i love felix...my guitar.

i think i just came in my pants. i was feeling major frustrated about my lack of time to...breathe...and so i FINALLY took felix (my yummy guitar) out of hiding and to do some damage control and apolo...
Posted by Liz smiles n lives lucid on Tue, 19 Sep 2006 05:14:00 PST