Vanity Smurf profile picture

Vanity Smurf

I would rather live in a world where life is surrounded by mystery, than live in a world so small th

About Me

I realized recently that I love stories. I love to listen to older people's tales from their past; I love movies with a great story line; I love songs that tell me something about how people live. I get along with all different types of people. When I worked at Commander's Palace, I could accompany the social elite to events and then go have a beer with the dishwashers from the 3rd ward. I suppose I just love people, period. I moved to Tallahassee from New Orleans two years ago. I miss New Orleans every day, but understand that I am suppose to be where I am right now. I feel that life should be lived to the fullest and you should never be afraid to take a risk. "If a person forswears pleasure in order to avoid misery, what has she gained? How can you admire a human who consciously embraces the bland, the mediocre, and the safe rather than risk the suffering that disappointments can bring?" [Jitterbug Perfume] I take that to mean, follow your heart and as long as you learn something, you can never make a wrong choice in life. I love nature, but I have to admit that small towns scare me. I plan on seeing a lot more of this tiny marble and living in a handful of different places before all is said and done. I also like big pimpin, spendin Gs, and saving the world from imminent peril.
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My Interests

the beach, the south, the sun, reading, activism, dogs, celebrity gossip, non-racist and pro-choice people, the color ORANGE, painting, interior design, jigsaw puzzles, clean sheets, Vogue magazine, wild animal sightings, crosswords, bourbon, rain storms, the little legs at the bottom of a bag of animal crackers, the nolia clap, traveling, drinking wine, sushi, abbrevs, diet coke (esp. with bourbon or orange juice), green tea, writing snail mail to my friends around the world, dancing, trivia, droppin it like its hot, discovering new bars, spanish moss, micro brews and interesting foreign beers, npr, ebay, your mom

I'd like to meet:

I have a core group of pals; they are mostly geeks, gays, or sassy ladies. I consider them to be my urban family and I love them all very much. If I believed in being 'blessed' I would say that I am, but I like to stick to 'fortunate' and 'lucky' instead. Seeing all the people who traversed the globe, literally, to share in my special weekend has never made me so happy and teary all at once. I adore my little chef husband at home who makes me laugh everyday. Who would I like to meet beyond these wonderful people I already know? Bottomline, you have to be funny, smart, and know how to drink. I didn't live in Nawlins fo nuthin! Oh, and I would also like to meet George Clinton at the drugstore while he is buying something banal, cuz I hear he lives in TLH and this is now my new goal: stalk and rub up on the King of Funk.Get Your Own! | View Slideshow
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Create a Free Slideshow What character from 'Will & Grace' are you?
You are Karen!

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Quizilla | Join| Make A Quiz | More Quizzes | Grab Code What Star Wars character are you?
You are Han Solo, unscrupulous scoundrel with a winning smile. You live by your own rules, but tend to get pulled in for good causes. Your selfishness is easily put aside for those you love.
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Brian Griffin
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Quizilla | Join| Make A Quiz | More Quizzes | Grab Code Arrested Development: Which Bluth Are You?
You are Lucille. Your tough exterior makes you seem uncaring at times but when your loved ones need you, you're more than happy to make their problems disappear. Have a drink, you deserve it.
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Your Passion is Orange
Your sex life is driven by your wild fantasies. For you, sex is a dramatic performance where you are the star. And you love putting on a wild act for your lover, trying to top last night's show. Whether you enjoy the actual sex is irrelevant... it's all about putting on a good act! What Color Is Your Passion?
Your Hair Should Be Orange
Expressive, deep, and one of a kind.
You pull off "weird" well - hardly anyone notices. What's Your Funky Inner Hair Color?
..
adopt your own virtual pet!
You're Brigitte Bardot!

What Classic Pin-Up Are You?
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You Are a Bloody Mary
You're a fairly serious drinker, who's experimented a lot with different drinks.
You're a drunk, but a stable drunk. You don't ever let your drinking get out of control. What Mixed Drink Are You? I wanna be an Igor's Bloody Mary, damnit!!!!!
How You Life Your Life
You have a good sense of self control and hate to show weakness.
You tend to avoid confrontation and stay away from sticky situations.
Your friends tend to be a as quirky as you are - which is saying a lot!
You tend to always dream of things within reach - and you usually get them. How Do You Live Your Life?

'Why are you going to hell?' at QuizGalaxy.com

You are LaFawnduh. Why are you so sweaty?

Which Napoleon Dynamite character are you?
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OMG my friends make me the best mix tapes!
Your Heart Is Orange
Love equals unbridled happiness for you. You enjoy the wild ride of falling in love.
And while the ride is fun for a while, you always get off once the thrill is gone.

Your flirting style: Hyper

Your lucky first date: Anything you need your passport for!

Your dream lover: Is both daring and well grounded

What you bring to relationships: Energy What Color Heart Do You Have?
Your Career Type: Social
You are helpful, friendly, and trustworthy.
Your talents lie in teaching, nursing, giving information, and solving social problems.

You would make an excellent:

Counselor - Dental Hygienist - Librarian
Nurse - Parole Officer - Personal Trainer
Physical Therapist - Social Worker - Teacher

The worst career options for your are realistic careers, like truck driver or farmer. What's Your Ideal Career?
You Are an Orange Martini
Everyone's favorite drunk, you're fun, flirty, and charming.
Unfortunately, you often spark jealousy - and unintentionally start bar fights.

You should never: Drink and dial. You'll just end up with multiple booty calls at your door!

Your ideal party: Is huge and lively. You love to work a crowd.

Your drinking soulmates: those with a Blueberry Martini personality

Your drinking rivals: those with a Dirty Martini personality What Flavor Martini Are You?

Smurf Name


Your Smurf Name is
Drunken Smurf
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jocelyne's lame-ass excuse to break up:

"I just think we would be better as enemies."

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I scored a 88% on the "How New Orleans are You?" Quizie! What about you?

Music:

lil wayne, the gossip, kylie, fischerspooner, scissor sisters, elkland, phoenix, world leader pretend, outkast, juve, big tymers, TI, mjg & eightball, bounce and southern rap, the roots, dizzy rascal,lady sovereign, g love, rebirth brass band, early michael jackson, earth wind and fire, peaches & herb... anything disco really, our lady peace, sonic youth, grateful dead, morphine, tribe, common, fat boy slim, guided by voices, dylan, mystikal, BT, morcheeba, tupac, perfect circle, manson, tori amos, depeche mode, sunny day real estate, Madonna, buffalo tom, bjork, early pumpkins, ekoostic hookah, tool, nine inch nails, deftones, pj harvey, pink flyod, van halen, duran duran, DANCE, second line music, 80's 80's 80's!, anything in Tre's deck...

Movies:

All the Muppet Movies, 300, Black Snake Moan, Napoleon Dynamite, gosh!, Office Space, Hustle and Flow, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Time Bandits, The Big Lebowski, The Doors, The Jerk, Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, Heathers, Blow, Snatch, Total Recall, Friday, Half Baked, Donnie Darko, Lost in Translation, Saturday Night Fever, Ghostbusters, Rushmore, Trainspotting, 200 Cigs, Run Lola Run, Troop Beverly Hills, Willy Wonka, Evil Dead series ("this is my boomstick!"), Star Wars (all of 'em, don't hate on 1 & 2, 'kay?), Judy Garland movies (Harvey Girls is my favorite- Ohio gal doing it for herself in the Wild West), Lord of the Rings, Hitchcock, Jawbreaker, Sideways, The Boondock Saints (hot guys with hard-ons for social justice? Yes please!), The 40 Year Old Virgin, The Warriors, Beetlejuice, Waking Life, A Scanner Darkly, Harry Potters, Solaris, The Man Who Fell To Earth, Supermans, Batmans, Sin City, Lakawanna Blues, Crash, The Prestige, Borat, Pirates of the Carribean-o, The Great Race, most musicals and older movies. Does ANYONE remember The Point narrated by Ringo Starr? Makes a great social statement and has some of the trippiest cartooning. One of my favorite actors and the only man who can rock a moustache and make it work:

Television:

Veronica Mars, Deadwood, Adult Swim, Cartoon Network, Boom Cartoon Channel, Surreal Life, The Office- from both sides of the Atlantic, Reno 911, Entourage, Arrested Development, Family Guy, A&E reality TV (Howzit Brah?), Seinfeld, Project Runway, Kids in the Hall (Girl Drink Drunk), BBC comedies (Are You Being Served?, My Family, Keeping Up Appearance, The Smoking Room, 'Allo 'Allo, Little Britain), any home makeover/decorating show (I was part of one!), Spongebob, Roseanne, News Radio, Conan, Golden Girls, Sex and the City, Pimp my Ride, Will and Grace, 106 and Park, Frasier, Star Trek. I would SO have been a Star Trek cast groupie.... Why Captain, what a big gun you have...

Books:

Anything by Tom Robbins, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, David Sedaris, Alice Walker, Chuck Palahniuk, Jack Kerouac, Anthony Bordain (met him), Anne Rice, Michael Moore, Bill Bryson, C.S. Lewis, Ray Bradbury, Pamela Anderson, all of the Dune series, Lord of the Rings and other fantasy stuff, Harry Potter!, A Confederacy of Dunces, The Poison Wood Bible, The Lovely Bones, The Little Prince, The Giving Tree, anything with a feminist bent, all kinds of science fiction

Heroes:


My best friend, confidant and hot lov-ah: Brian.
My sister for always putting up with me and my many moods and neuroses.
The lady who looked after me as if I was her own and who I call my second Mom: Marie.

I have many heros. Basically, anyone who is willing to put someone else before themselves and who avoids making others feel small or unimportant. The people who fight passionately for human rights in this country and around the world. Those who take a stand for the environment and all things natural. The people who are rebuilding my favorite city: the N.O. fa sho!

My Blog

My PostSecret is that Im Vain....hey wait a minute..

I am finally getting around to writing about last weekend, even as the next weekend fastly approaches.  Read on for the one evening I was more famous than my husband... Just a little background:&...
Posted by Vanity Smurf on Thu, 20 Sep 2007 02:43:00 PST

Birthdays, Beer, and Bundt Cakes

Birthday recap time!  First off let me preface the following account by saying that I had the best birthday weekend of my life.  I've had amazing birthdays in the past (French Quarter limo r...
Posted by Vanity Smurf on Mon, 20 Aug 2007 10:56:00 PST

we've been walkin it out since the dawn of man

...
Posted by Vanity Smurf on Sun, 08 Jul 2007 10:29:00 PST

Philadelphia Freedom!

I have been procrastinating on writing a blog about my recent trip to Philly.  I think it's because there were certain part that I wanted to keep private, but also didn't want to not mention why ...
Posted by Vanity Smurf on Thu, 05 Jul 2007 10:27:00 PST

Pistachios from California are Little Love Notes from God

It's midnight.  The fireworks are over.  The vodka-soaked watermelon has been eaten.  The bourbon has been put away and my best friend is safely back on the west coast.  I have jus...
Posted by Vanity Smurf on Thu, 05 Jul 2007 09:15:00 PST

Some Things Of Which I Am Thinking

1. Sometimes I sincerely feel bad for people who aren't Leos. And then I feel better because I realize it makes me more exclusive. And then I think, what the fuck am I talking about?2.  There...
Posted by Vanity Smurf on Wed, 27 Jun 2007 12:28:00 PST

Who Isssss It? : The T Party

I had planned on this past weekend being busy and of course I only ended up doing half of what I intended.  I'm almost glad it's over because I get too excited about things like this and it makes...
Posted by Vanity Smurf on Tue, 12 Jun 2007 09:37:00 PST

it's so easy, being mean

Often times at night as I lie back on my bed with my dog and husband and feel the warm Florida breeze coming in though the windows, I feel calm and an overall sense of peace and forgiveness.  And...
Posted by Vanity Smurf on Wed, 06 Jun 2007 12:46:00 PST

What a Difference A Gnome Makes

I am feeling toasty lately. NOT BURNT OUT.  I refuse to get burnt out.  I have been warned by others in the social services field to watch for warning signs, but I have enacted measures to c...
Posted by Vanity Smurf on Thu, 31 May 2007 08:10:00 PST

my girl likes to party all the time

Thursdays are my favorite night of the week to go out, because no matter how inebriated you get you only have one day at work to deal with the after effects.  Thursdays really get a weekend start...
Posted by Vanity Smurf on Fri, 18 May 2007 07:59:00 PST