Irish Virus (the) - ProfilesArchive

About Me

born: 1947, Samsung, Germany. my mother was a car dealer, and my father was a whiffle ball. We'd have family drinking nights on Friday. Whoever won would have to catch dinner. Good thing there were no rules, therefore, nobody won, nobody ate, and everybody starved to death. Except for me, who moved to America in 1931 to pursue a lustrious career as a hip-hop star. By the age of negative 7, I was on the road to happiness. But the road made me fork over my sense of direction and I ended up stuck in the rotary of misery. By the time I reached the ripe old age of zero and a half, I had capitalized the market on ritualistic psychological emu torture and was on a number of infomercials in the 1840's, wearing a polka dotted fig leaf. Anyways, to make a short story long, I shall keep going. At the age of aquarius I adopted an airport and named it Amtrack. Now it reads cat's milk and lives with it roommate, Mukluk, in the last carpeted closet available in Ol' Jersey.

My Interests

Music:

Member Since: 05/02/2007
Band Website: www.purevolume.com/irishvirusthe
Band Members: Have any of you ever had to break a rock, all day, every day, for no reason, with chains on your legs?
Influences: The Roots, Cake, Les Claypool, Last Emperor, Louis Logic, Brother Ali, Tom Waits, Apathy, Dream Theater, Jedi Mind Tricks, Dispatch, Necro, Maceo Parker, Mike Patton, Nas, Rakim, Zappa
Sounds Like: a yawn during a BM
Record Label: Fart on my Fucking Face Records
Type of Label: Major

My Blog

Fuck Forks, Finger Your Food

As you may already be aware of, I was mugged last weekend by a gorilla wearing a man-dressed-up-in-a-gorilla costume and was stabbed repeatedly in the penis. He also threw piping hot vegetable soup at...
Posted by on Wed, 24 Sep 2008 23:49:00 GMT

My Movie Idea

This is something I've been pitching around the big-wigs, but no bites so far: Ok, so&a mother goes into her third trimester and finds out some terrible news, there appears to be a large, hopefully be...
Posted by on Fri, 29 Feb 2008 20:47:00 GMT

My First Vasectamy

So...my roommate was watching an episode of Jay Leno's variety show last night and happened to catch a glimpse of Satan (according to him) standing behind the bassist in the band. Satan...
Posted by on Thu, 31 Jan 2008 09:48:00 GMT

Warning, Please Do Not Read This. VERY PRIVATE.

Yesterday, while walking to work, I shit in my pants. Accidentally. I had had too many apple streusels, and I was zoned out listening to my headphones, so I didn't realize that my bowels had loosened....
Posted by on Fri, 06 Apr 2007 14:07:00 GMT