Rachel profile picture

Rachel

To become a butterfly, you must want to fly so much that you are willing to give up being a caterpil

About Me

I believe our country is fighting a war we cannot possibly win, even if we are successful at defeating the "enemy".
I work hard to pay my own way through life because nothing comes offered on a silver platter.
I figure no race is without ignorant individuals, and as long as you're open-minded, friendly and are able to speak somewhat intelligently, you're OK in my book.
I'm an extremely deep person ... Moreso than anyone in the world knows or realizes.
I LOATHE liars, more than I can put into words … and "two-facers" are next on my list.
I'm emotionally unstable for many reasons and choose to express myself through writings that seem odd and excentric to those who don't understand. (Though I am not crazy, nor am I seeking attention.)
I worship Jenna Jameson. (If I were a "closet lesbian"--as many like to imply--I would not admit to my infatuation.)
As a child, I wished for lifetime love and fairy tales that ended happily. Now, I presume love to be no more than a series of events in which certain people will impact your future, either for better or worse. Forever is just a word in the dictionary.
I rarely go "out", but when I do, I usually party too hard and have no self-control as to how much alcohol I consume. (My *true* friends have been kind enough to tolerate this imperfection without contributing to any "talk".)
I don't think America is a free country, despite the fact that I've never been outside its borders, and will argue my point to the death.
My conspiracy theories are intriguing, and great conversational topics. (In my opinion, at least.)
Great sex only goes so far in a relationship. After "the honeymoon period" has worn off, great communication is a necessity two lovers cannot live without.
I don't like to argue, and therefore usually bottle things up inside until they frustrate me so much, I cry.
I ruined half my life worrying about how others perceived me. Now … if you're not paying my bills or a compliment, you can eat shit.

My Interests

In no particular order: The Miami Dolphins & Heat; Playing Raquetball; Painting; The color pink; Karaoke; Scented candles; Snowglobes; The Playboy Bunny; Movies; Forensics; Reading; Writing; Poetry; Music; Porn (lol); Board/Video Games; Cooking; Dining out; Concerts; Dancing (even though I stink at it!); Pool; Poker ...

I'd like to meet:

People who are mind-stimulating and know how to have a good conversation. I've reached the point in my life in which I'd like to surround myself with some other [at least semi] responsible adults who do more than party 7 days a week.

A raquetball partner, even though I'm not the best at it.

Jenna Jameson ... My idol for many reasons ... (If you don't know who she is, please educate yourself before initiating contact with me.)

Audrey Hepburn would've been cool. She's one of my favorite actresses.

Music:

Anything GOOD ... New/classic rock, goth, 80s, country, SOME R&B, pop ... Depends on my mood. (H.I.M. is amazing, so is The Cure ... Metal Reign, Dutch, The Cranberries ... But Heart tops my charts.)

Movies:

Just about anything ... Comedies, dramas, actions, chick flicks, thrillers, horror, kid's movies, documentaries ... I like a lot of the classics, as well - especially anything starring Audrey Hepburn or Cary Grant.

Television:

Law & Order, baby!!!!; Monk; Heroes; Alias; Lost; Desperate Housewives; Psych; Seinfeld; The Sopranos; Without A Trace; House ... I don't watch much TV these days - mostly rent the series once they're out on DVD, so I'm usually behind. (No commercials though ... Two thumbs up!) ... And then, of course, there's football, basketball the WPT and at times, golf.

Books:

Self-help books, cause I somehow believe they'll mold me into a better person ... I do much more writing.

Heroes:

My mother ... A single parent who worked 2 jobs for over 20 years to raise her 2 kids ... I love her to death. She's my best friend.

My late step-father, Luke, for being a hard-working, (and in his own way) loving provider for a family that never had to be his responsibility.

Jenna Jameson - aside from the fact that she's smoking hot, she's also a marketing genius.

My Blog

The Morning After

Regret. I'm not sure I feel any. (Okay, maybe a little ... but not nearly as much as I probably should.) Does that make me a bad person? Last night I became something I promised myself I never would -...
Posted by Rachel on Mon, 26 Mar 2007 06:45:00 PST

The Reflection ... Part II

"Am I crazy?" She stared me square in the eye, arching a thin brown as the odd question was proposed. "Perhaps ... Though, isn't everyone a bit crazy?" There was a long pause, and no respon...
Posted by Rachel on Tue, 06 Feb 2007 10:50:00 PST

Dear God ...

I know I'm not perfect--far from I'd imagine. I've been living a life full of booze, drugs and passion. I'm not nearly as kind as you'd like me to be, And though I try to change, this is it ... this i...
Posted by Rachel on Tue, 06 Feb 2007 10:50:00 PST

Suicide

"It's too late," I told them all as they gathered round the base of the waterfall. "She's been under there for twenty minutes!" There were at least fifty tourists now, most of whom had been snapp...
Posted by Rachel on Tue, 06 Feb 2007 10:48:00 PST

The Reflection

"I'm scared," she told me, her eyes wide and glossy. I tried to console her and offer words of comfort, but she didn't care to hear any of it - just kept talking."I've hit the rockiest road of my...
Posted by Rachel on Tue, 06 Feb 2007 10:47:00 PST