someone who could help me get what i want from life, such as spending my life doing something that i wont look back on as a complete waste of time. I would be disappointed with myself if i was to allow a mixture of apathy, pessimism and laziness to condemn me to an empty form of existence. Also while i dont really believe in soul mates, i do however believe that love is an experience that is important to the soul. I could only be happy with someone who I respect (positive way of living etc), desire (Good body etc) and have a strong connection with on spiritual,emotional and intellectual levels. Whilst I am disappointed by certain aspects of myself, such as my idleness and rather unpredictable nerves, I am however very strong minded and am fiercly proud of my virtues, as i often find i have to defend myself from a barrage of criticisms etc from people who just dont get why I live my life in the way I do, such as my rejection of excessive hedonism. I consider my virtues to be my honesty, trustworthiness, empathy, self-respect and courage. These are the minimum values which i demand of myself and as a result i couldn't imagine being happy with a woman who did not live a life also reflecting such virtues. A PERFECT CIRCLE - IMAGINE. Self-resect is the biggest problem i encounter when looking for the right type of girl. In me i show my self-respect by looking after both my body and my mind, through exercising both to maintain at least a minimum level of good health and intelligence. I rarely binge drink, only drinking to levels which my body can cope with, i dont smoke, take drugs, i eat a healthy diet and i dont have casual sex.Such sacrifices i felt were necessary to make as i found when i did live a much more hedonistic life, the short term pleasures etc were out-weighed by physical pains, and depression. I brought myself to my knees in the past through such activities and i have no intention of returning to that way of living, i have now found relative peace of mind and a source of strength within myself, enough strength to ignore people who dont understand my views and to ensure i never sell my soul by giving in to peer pressures etc. If for example i did go back to drinking in the way i used to then how many of these 'friends' would be there offering me one of their kidneys if mine were ruined (a bit harsh maybe, but you only truly know who are your real friends in such circumstances), and other such examples. I've unfortunately learnt that the only person in your life who you can rely upon is yourself, so it makes perfect sense to me to be a great friend to my body and mind, rather than an enemy. I would never be able to find happiness with someone who was still more of an enemy to herself than a friend. I expect to be single for a long long time, but im strong enough and perhaps stubborn enough to accept that, i just couldnt live a life in which i felt that i had betrayed myself. I need a partner who feels the same way. KORN-4U