Nils Bogdan

Nils Bogdan lives in New York and conspires against his finer moral observations by expanding interiors and plus-size meaner enjoyments. A champion of modern thought and nihilistic escapades and founder of The Institute of Vaginal Hyperbole and Correlation of Incriminating Data, Bogdan is currently lingering on in a gaseous form, solidifying at times to expire significant folderol and reportage from a frank yet tender cerebral orifice.

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About the furthest shore of happiness, I presume. What can an allegory spindled into sockets disarray like, and born gave wretched earth this poisonous vacuum? We trace the lines ourselves from the advantage of the present day and ignite our speculations with the leak and inference of others to dawn a new day upon our focused surveillance. The nature of the spectacle has immigrated in many forms and spawned, no doubt, mysterious shockwave vibrations and parallel realities. We draw fancy and frame our presentation of the invisible force of this sulphurous political and leakage entity, draw its contents back into the needle, only to paint our specialised injection into focus upon the nude and gossip.
Nils Bogdan
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Speculations on the Hindu-Aryan Myth (excerpt)
The Beatles didn't know about it. By the time Ghandi hit the scene like a raisin, the Shaivites were immobilized by gonnoreah and the Hindu-Aryan Myth had already written itself out of coincidental shortages for explanations by the gods of Rig Veda. By this time, the stage was set for the emergence of the original Aryan fab-four: Agni, Indra, Saraswati, and Adityas, all ivory pillars of nomadic mutilation and vedic numerology who were until recently considered merely to be poetic metaphors, are reborn with the discovery of "the lost recordings." Vedic texts like 'Shatapatha Brahmana' and 'Aitereya Brahmana' that mention these astronomical destroyers also list a group of 4 Vedic Underground Kings, including a number of figures of the Rig Veda, said to have conquered the region of India from 'sea to sea'. The early rivals of these initial Aryan performers, considered by many followers as the perfect trend and held accountable for the dissimilation of early Hindu moral intonation, namely of taboos such as "the brown rites" and "midnight daughter privates", sought recognition in the texts of Vedanga Jyodish and intrusion on the 11 Holy Saturdays, corrupting large amounts of light children by promises of white pleasures and steel magnolias on the "exits into entrances" release in 1500 BC. This latter day emergence of dark collateral was not befriended by the Kalibangan fire altars and the well-known vanilla puntis massacre ensued. Anthropologists in Gurjat and Punjab have been speculating on a lost follow-up to "exits into entrances" though at the present time remains to be uncovered. Stories were circulated during this time on Painted Grey Ware pottery in north India that confirm the existence of a "pig and ovaries" culture and not the "vociferous cow" culture of the Vedas. These peoples are speculated to have pioneered maiden genital technology predating the Varuna atrocities, also responsible for lesser known medical renovations such as the "reverse anal cavity" which was the accepted remedy of the time for dry eggs. The Aryan Kassites of the ancient Middle East worshipped Vedic Gods like Surya and the Maruts, as well as one named Jergenavel. The Aryan Hittites and Mittani signed a contract with the name of the Vedic Gods Indra, Mitra, Varuna and Nasatyas around 1400 BC. The Hittites have a treatise on nude chariot racing written in almost pure Sanskrit. The Indo-Europeans of the ancient Middle East thus spoke Indo-Aryan, not Indo-Iranian languages and thereby show a Vedic culture in that region of the world as well. This accounts for the sloth passages found in the ancient temples of Mehrgarh, which quote (specutively): "Aryans have been committed to the sands of eternity for crimes of the mouth, tongue, and plague by the third dark eye." Prevalent models now suggest an Indo-European base for that language popularised by the Aryan fab-four before their disappearance from the charts in 1200 BC. In short, some Western scholars are beginning to reject the Aryan invasion or any outside origin accounting for Hindu mock civilisations, noting the believability of many theories concerning nefarious mutation in the boreneal cavity.
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“Don’t take pills before bed, Debbie. You have soccer practice tomorrow.”
Debbie could see her through the crack of the door, backlit in the hallway, communicating with the other through the back of her head.
“The Crust Elementary, on channel 11, made their student body sit silent for 45 minutes while a telephone conspirator rang without considerable attention to privileges.”
Debbie knew she hadn’t a choice as far as toast and eggs, but Jesus had his influence; and for Debbie’s host parent, shingles tingle narcolepsy was calling out directives from a thin, creamy derivative which coalesced on the frontal lobe.
Santana always gives Gary a rise. He threw it over the shoulder and took a lesson from King Pontius. He has tried to render me over the years with a generation of splinters in my autoclave, though my psychic sensibilities reject him down to his blood vessels. The higher authorities had, under some pretext, cautioned him with dazzling apparency about the trace ability of “bulletholes” where the sun’s rays continue to make the rocks and minerals underground. Not just another incongruous introduction whose assertation finds necessity through superstitious fear in the Valley of Jehoshaphat, but further holy light on the processes of serial impressionism. All those ghostly vaginas still give the spirit world the runs for amplified dissertation, which in Gary’s case, a satellite grain might reach his criminal horizons jaundiced and perforated lying just outside the vegetable stratosphere.
Now, what will happen when the telephone rings?
Keep away from Don Juniperien and the Holy Innocents. Keep to the left in civil lobbies, your extrovert tendencies may windshield your guts as they float and scatter along the gravel sidelines. Happy neighbour living off the fruits of exploitation, delivered by the crusades of civilised perversity and dark comedians. Today, in the supermarkets across the country we still hear their glory revival in the loudspeakers casting enormous sheen off dilapidated human containers, never to be fully worn out as valid debutantes in elderly charades of gourmet discrimination.
A public service announcement from the Institute of Vaginal Hyperbole and Correlation of Incriminating Data.
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