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1512978

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me

I was born two months premature. When I was one, I was dropped on the porch. When I was two, I had pneumonia. When I was three, I got the chicken pox. When I was four, I fell down the stairs and broke six ribs. When I was five, my uncle was decapitated by a watermelon. When I was six, my parents hit me in the head with a shovel. When I was seven, I lost my right index finger to my pet rat.When I was eight, my dog Spike got hit by a tractor. When I was nine, my mother lost her arm to a rabid cow. When I was ten, my sister was torn to bits by a pack of dogs. When I was eleven, my grandfather killed himself because I was ugly. When I was twelve, my grandmother killed herself because I was ugly. When I was thirteen, my father poked out his eyes with a pitchfork in a drunken stupor...because I was ugly.When I was fourteen, my brother lost his hand to a wallaby. When I was fifteen, my aunt choked to death on a chicken bone. When I was sixteen, I lost my cousin to a badger. When I was seventeen, I cut off my left big toe with a hoe. When I was eighteen, my father lost his right leg to the same tractor that killed my dog. When I was nineteen this strange fungus started growing on my testicles. When I was twenty I got penis cancer. When I was twenty one all the hair on my body migrated to by back. When I was twenty two my cat choked to death on a cheeto.But hey, gotta stay posative.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

You know when you feel the weight of sadness. You may feel anxious, exhausted, and hopeless. Whatever you do you feel lonely, and don't enjoy the things you once loved. Things just don't feel like they used to. The are some symptoms of fluff withdrawl, a serious medical condition affecting over 20 million Americans. While the cause is unknown, fluff withdrawl may be related to an imbalance of chemicals between nerve cells in the brain. Mr. Fluffy works to correct this imbalance. You just shoulden't have to feel this way anymore. Only Mr. Fluffy can diagnose fluff withdrawl. Mr. Fluffy is not for everyone. Side effects may include dry mouth, insomnia, sleepyness, headaches, muscle pain, restless leg syndrome, diarrhea, abdominal pain, sweating, vomiting, shakiness, constipation, compulsive gambling, sleep-walking, sleep-driving, extraordinary thinking, binge eating, excessive salivation, lactation, co-dependancy with cardboard boxes, telekenisis, Mormanisim, leprosy, lycanthropy, decapitation by watermelon, pyro-necro-danderphillia, chronic depression, terminal smile, abrubt change in gender, severe anal hemoraging, pregnancy, unconrtolable urge to sleep with roomates father, homelessness, multiple personality disorder, rapid toenail growth, "My skeleton is trying to claw it's way out of my flesh" syndrome, cough, nunny nose, fever, dizzyness, and a mild case of death. Mr. Fluffy is non-habit forming in give or take 99% of perscribed users. Talk to Mr. Fluffy about Mr. Fluffy; The number one perscribed brand of it's kind.

My Blog

For those out of the loop

The current state of affairs!After a two semister hiatus I'll be back in college at the end of the month, charging like a freight train from hell towards that BA in Sociology. Car is going fine, cats ...
Posted by on Sat, 01 Aug 2009 19:47:00 GMT

The worst advice you could ever heed

"You can't have your cake and eat it to"Oh bullshit!What good is a cake if you can't eat it? If you don't eat that cake of yours what happens to it? It sits there and looks pretty at first. You could ...
Posted by on Fri, 03 Jul 2009 21:43:00 GMT

Despite all his efforts, Mr. Fluffy cannot write a happy tune

But he sure can be a sarcastic SOB! I am the black in a sea of whiteI am the noise in the middle of the nightI am the ass that called your phoneI'll ring you up if I'm feeling aloneI am misery and I w...
Posted by on Sat, 11 Apr 2009 23:48:00 GMT

The Zen of Fluff

The hardest part of job applications has always been the questions 'What are your strengths?' and 'What are your weaknesses?'. This is something I've been thinking about a lot lately. I've always been...
Posted by on Thu, 18 Dec 2008 01:39:00 GMT

A lesson to be learned

Evan the most jaded soul must admit that an oak tree has a cretain majesty, even beauty to it. Yet you'll notice that nothing else grows near one. The leaves are acidic and the tree sheds them year ro...
Posted by on Fri, 29 Aug 2008 06:08:00 GMT

This blog has been moved, ect.

Damn, his must be the first post in here in over a year. Got on LiveJournal and forgot all about this. Serriously, the only times I'd come in is to accept some friend requests here and there. Think it...
Posted by on Sun, 21 Aug 2005 21:14:00 GMT