You!
Well, provided that you're not any of the following:
-an agent of the IRS
-an assassin (Russian or otherwise)
-a three-toed sloth
-a bicycle
-me, but with a goatee, as that would make you mirror-me and hence evil
-that TSA guy that confiscated my Arthur Bryant's barbeque sauce. :(
-Cryptocaryon
-a mosquito, as I appear to be your favored enemy