alfrida

I've never known a musician who regretted being one. Whatever deceptions life may have in store for you, music itself is not going to let you down.
I wish I had written this but the American composer Virgil Thomson was born in the late 18th century. I am for a tiny bit younger ...I think...
I can't believe that I spent couple of hours trying to put on the "electronic paper" something for you to read about me. Writing a master thesis would be much more easier project to complete, heehe... br>
Should I start from my early childhood or I can just skip that? I was just an ordinary kid from the block... nothing "extraordinaire" happened... hmmmm, except for one thing....I will tell you later
Unlike many professional musicians I am not born in a family of musicians which certainly does not mean that we, "The Others" do not listen to the music at home. Most people believe that’s the case (?!?!) Actually, I was very lucky to be surrounded with good music since my father was working in a radio station and had an extensive vinyl collection from the 50's 60's 70's...Yeah, in "my time" (which happens to be the last century) vinyls were spinning the world. Very soon many DJs found out that vinyls are more enjoyable toys for spinning them in an opposite direction, which on the other hand, is different from scratching them. This just shows that you can always make something good out of an old, worn thing. This was just a short digression from the main topic....
All kids I know like music. They simply posses that natural bodily rhythm, easily move to the beat, sing a song, bang on a can or other kitchen "multipurpose" utensils. My early music explorations proved to be worthwhile. At 4 and half I was already singing at a children festival. I won the second prize, but when they handed me the prize, a small oval-shaped ceramic plate with a nightingale engraved on it I just throw it away right there on the stage. Why? Because they didn't give me flowers. Who cares about something that sooner or later will be buried in a drawer? But flowers...Today I will most likely trade the flowers for books, good music and movies. I'm so sorry for not having a video of that. That was one of my rare rebellious "action-reaction" behaviors. Nevertheless, as a prospective and hopefully sufficiently smart, passionate and fullhearted musician, my parents enrolled me at the music school.
The first instrument I played was violin. I wanted piano but teachers said "You will play violin!" Period. End of story. I was crying. My mother too. We just bought a piano. True, you can always use it as a bookshelf though at that time having a "pianoshelf" in the house was quite fancy for my taste.
I must say that I did not enjoy violin 100%. Couple of years flew away when another instrument caught my ear - viola. It seemed so appealing and seducing instrument with its mellow, warm and rich sound. I decided to switch to viola and I am very happy for doing that but sometimes I wish I learned to play cello. We are never completely satisfied with what we have, haven’t we?
Elementary school, high-school, and finally Faculty of Music Arts. I was hungry for learning more, so I continued with graduate studies, specializing in "Culture and Arts Management" but very few people perceived the need of having educated managers in this area. It was so disappointing for me.... Did I mentioned that I am from the Republic of Macedonia? No? OK, I am saying it now so that you can create a mental image where all of the above was taking place. Macedonia - happy, jolly country. I am sure you can figure it out where it is. A hint: it is small, has three beautiful lakes, a tiny, tiny island, high and not-so-high mountains, good (more or less) 2 million people, ORGANIC and TASTEFULL vegetables and fruits, ajvar (spread of baked, red peppers), white cheese, drinking tap water... probably there are few more good things I can think of...
What else I wanted to say? If you are interrupting me every paragraph I won’t be able to finish the story!
It is quite normal that we, humans want to be better and more successful in every regard. Money doesn't have anything to do with our desire for never ending “upgrade”. Or, maybe...on a second thought...That is why we tend to invent daily exercises for our encephalon (or organ of thought if you prefer), we attend zillion workshops, certificate programs, professional trainings, internships, we volunteer here and there hoping that we will save the world from ignorance, make it better place where people will be happier and smarter, and everything around us will look brighter. Sounds to good to be true. But you have to believe that something will eventualy change...preferably in your lifetime...
So, why should I be different? I was doing all that. I was playing at youth chamber orchestras, at the Macedonian National Opera, at the Macedonian Philharmonic. I tried other things too: like being a music journalist, radio host, and work for the Skopje Jazz Festival, which is one of my favourite music-work related assignments. Thanks to SJF I had full access to a wonderful collection of music all over the world, as well as to performers such as Arto LIndsay, Henry Threadgill, Don Byron, Jan Garbarek, James Brown, John Zorn, Elliott Sharp, Ray Charles, Tito Puente, Eddie Palmieri, The Zavinul Syndicate, Herbie Hancock, Chick Corea, Oregon, John Macloughlin, Al Di Meola, John Abercromby, Mecoy Tayner, Dave Holland, Ahmad Jamal, Dave Douglas, Gotan Project, Nils Peter Molvaer, Kronos Quarter, Balanesku, Madredeus, Cecil Taylor, Kip Hanrahan, and many, many more....I was looking forward to those 4 or 5 days in October. Life was swinging and everything looked so easy and achievable.
One more very important encounter took place around this time of my life. Meeting Dorian and becoming a member of String Forces. What a challenge was my first rehearsal with them. Me, a classical trained violist was expected to play in the spur of the moment, without music sheets?!?!? It was so scary when you don't know how to translate the melodies in your head and place them onto your own instrument. But people in the band were very supportive, patient, cool. Above all we were respecting each other and any idea was encouraged and appreciated. The beauty of the band was that all of us had different background in terms of our professions, music we were listening to, books we were reading, people we admired to. We were learning one from another during the long rehearsals (too many to count), we were exchanging music, playing techniques, and valuable thoughts. We were close friends. That was (and still is) the bonding link of String Forces - rehearsals and recordings at our own studio Profundus, many friends eager to help with photo sessions, music video shooting, stage performances. You name it! A few CDs released, music videos, numerous live performances, well accepted by the audience and the media wherever we went. There was no money in all of these but we were so enthusiastic. How many bands can afford to play exclusively their OWN music not “covers”? I may say that we were initiators of couple of challenging things which were followed by other Macedonian bands too...
Finally, together with the Orchestra of traditional instruments "Pece Atanasovski" we worked on "Kaldrma" - a project aimed to bring new life and preserve the old (and almost forgotten) traditional Macedonian chalgia music... And that counts...
String Forces, SJF and number of other inspirational friends, musicians and non-musicians whom I crossed my path along the way extended and sharpened my musical taste, as well as my vision of not taking life so seriously and listen to my heart which, I must say, sometimes can be very confusing.
There were certain points when music became a hobby to me, not a profession. It seems that as we get older our ambitions get bigger. I was doing things that haven't had to do anything with music. In that period I got an overall insight of how government and non-government organizations function. And.....after couple of years I decided to take a few steps backwards and be a full-time musician, again. Far from that that I didn't like my non-music job assignments. I learned many good things, I met interesting people, I had a diplomatic passport (now I feel the downsize of not having one, ha,ha). Everything was OK but I had the feeling that something is missing, that I am not completely fulfilled and happy. That is why I left everything behind. At this point I can not say if I made the right decision but at least I had the courage to step out and do something about it, though it took me a lot of time to realise that "This is not a rehearsal of my life. This is my life!"
And, here I am in the USA. For many a country one can only dream of. I wonder if this country is part of my personal dream too. It's too early to say ... I am lucky to be surrounded with wonderful people over here, a few friends from my home country, and many new friends from different parts of the world. I like that mix. I think I can function better in such "multi" setting. We understand each other well, we don't have prejudices about certain issues, we are all foreigners trying to adjust to the new environment while still keeping our traditional values and beliefs...With most of them I communicate through the music. Music itself is a language. Speak my music!
I am just exploring the possibilities around, hoping to find what I am looking for. If something doesn't work well I can always pack my instrument and leave, right? Where? Most likelly Brazil or Nepal. Why not? Music is everywhere. Nothing else really matters...
Here is a list of some of the releases that I was a part of:
Tristâme "Unraveling Horizons" (USA)
Pannonian Wave "Current" (USA)
Almost Lucille "Feeling Red" (USA)
CIA Mambembrincantes - "Mesedina" (Brazil)
String Forces - "Silky Way" (Macedonia)
Kaldrma - "Macedonian Chalgia Music" (Macedonia)
String Forces - "Zavedeni" Soundtrack (Macedonia)
String Forces - "Izohronija" (Macedonia)
String Forces - "String Forces" (Macedonia)
Mizar - "Terrible Beauty is Born" (Macedonia)
Dejan Spasovic & Krume Stefanovski - "Grasshoppers" short documentary film (Macedonia)
Ajvar - "Epten Zivo", Traditional Macedonian Music (Macedonia)
Kokan Dimusevski - "Obscure Music" Babylonia CD (Macedonia)
Other music making projects, performances, and demo recordings:
Panonian Wave / Carla Bosnjak and Christofer Lovrin "Beneath the Waves", LaMaMa Theatre (USA)
Panonian Wave / Kim Ima & Onni Johnson “Food for Thoughts” , LaMaMa Theatre (USA)
Panonian Wave / Betty Marisol Garcia "Lola", short documentary film / Monkeyscorpio Production & Coco Pictures (USA)
La Strada (USA)
Scot Magri and The Rubber Band (USA)
VED - "Traditional Folk Music from the Balkans" (Serbia)
Aco and Agua (Brazil)
Bodan Arsovski - "Ethno Music Project" (Macedonia)