The Hittites
The Hittites burst out of Anatolia around four thousand years ago with their revolutionary iron technology and new-fangled Indo-European language. After a promising start, they were smitten by Yahweh along with the Jebusites, Ammonites and Vegemites to make way for the Israelites, featuring Joshua son of Nun, Abimelech son of Jerubbaal and Desmond Dekker. They bounced back with remarkable tenacity, however, adopting modern instruments such as the banshaw and Buschmann's patented aura. They can be found in the sleepy seaside town of Aberystwyth, chasing donkeys, eating ice cream and scaring passers by with their own brand of hillbilly pop music. The most famous Hittites are Uriah who survived being killed in 2 Samuel 11 to form a rubbish heavy metal band in the 1970s, and Dave who once snogged Will Young's sister.
Yr Hethiaid
Ymledodd yr Hethiaid o Anatolia tua phedair mil o flynyddoedd yn ôl gyda'u technoleg haearn chwyldroadol a'u hiaith Indo-Ewropeaidd newydd sbon. Ar ôl dechreuad addawol, cosbwyd nhw gan Iahwe, ynghyd â'r Jebusiaid, yr Ammoniaid, y Thatcheriaid a Morusiaid Môn er budd yr Israeliaid a gynhwysai Josua ap Nun, Abimelech ap Jerubbaal a Desmond Dekker. Daethant yn ôl gyda dygnwch clodwiw, gan fabwysiadu offerynnau modern megis y 'banshaw' ac 'aura' Buschmann. Deuir ar eu traws yn y dref lan y môr gysglyd honno Aberystwyth, yn siaso asynnod, bwyta hufen iâ a chodi ofn ar bobl yn mynd heibio gyda'u cerddoriaeth bop hilbili. Yr Hethiaid enwocaf yw Uriah a oroesodd gael ei ladd yn 1 Samuel 11 i ffurfio band metel trwm ofnadwy yn y 1970au a Dêf a gusanodd chwaer Will Young unwaith.
