SIR ANDREW CROCKER profile picture

SIR ANDREW CROCKER

I am here for Friends

About Me

Ok ok ok humans, listen thus now, he's about to say something very clever and witty and profound, something so divisive and jazzy that you will all most certainly explode back into the oblivion from whence you once sprang and when he is finished he will bla bla bla fucking bla until the bla is all turned into bla, and the gog and magog of the theoretical world will be bla'd and behold, bla will still most certainly equal bla........ And don't you know that I and you and he and they and we and every single entity in the nonsense molecular three-dimensional paradigm called reeeeeeeeeeeeeee ality is all just the work of dirt and piss and vinegar and the pen strokes of a few bearded men that are all now buried in the ground and rotting into the shit they fed the world while they were still living...no but surely not sayeth the multitude...Don't you know that my prayers to the otherworld afford me and my pious self far more convenient parking than you and your pitty parallels and parodies of the world and its origins proper?...Ah fine be that way, pearls to swine and swine off the cliffside. Go on creating heaven and I'll go on recreating earth and you'll go on with your holy war and me will be going on with my unholy peace and all will be well until of course all is not well again....war war war...peace peace peace....that man can speak is his greatest curse of all time but only because he has so many things to say and surely the most farthest reaching spire of this tragic irony is that while he speaks there is not a single ear which hears him........ Don't care don't care don't care don't care I'm just gonna smash my wine glass down on the earth of men and scream at the death of god and the birth of man BLA BLA BLA FUCKING BLA knowing that tomorrow I die and into the ground they will lower me, and there I will rot slowly back into the dirt I fed people while I was still alive. To hell with heaven and to hell with hell and to hell with the man that says TO HELL WITH HEAVEN AND HELL because the only thing that any of us will remember when each of our ends catches up to us is the raw tune of the raw soul of the raw flesh that is raw to the rawest of raw and the tune is BLA BLA BLA FUCKING BLA.......

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My Interests

I play guitar, I read, and I write and I'm perfectly crap at at all three....................................................... ............................................................ ............................................................ ......

Movies:

RICHARD DAWKINSNORMA JEAN...THE SHOTGUN MESSAGETELESCOPIC EVOLUTIONEXISTENTIALISMLANGUAGESUPERSONICOASIS IN 94OASIS....STAND BY ME (ACOUSTIC)KEROUAC READS "ON THE ROAD"...BUKOWSKI

Television:

SOUTH PARK. amen.

Books:

THUS SPOKE ZARATHUSTRA (Nietzsche)...On the Road (Kerouac)...The Influence of Sea Power upon History (Mahan)...Atlas Shrugged (Rand)...East of Eden (Steinbeck)...A People's History of the United States (Zinn)...Don Quixote (Cervantes)...The Bible (bearded dudes)...The Iliad and The Odyssey (Homer)...The Communist Manifesto (Marx and Engels)...Mein Kampf (Hitler)...Yes, amen, there is more but I feel really obnoxious writing out like a thousand titles.....

Heroes:

R. Crocker...Nietzsche...Dawkins...Dr. Adaimak...Dr. Baker...Dr. Law...Mrs. Peters...Dr. Maxwell...Z...Leaf sometimes...T. Roosevelt...B. Dylan...J. Kerouac...L. and N. Gallagher...Jagger...Jesus sometimes...M. Stone and T. Parker...Kera the Girl...This guy at Seven Eleven who makes me want to be nice to people...

My Blog

DOPE THE PLANET

Once had this theory that the world continued to be the way that it was because people were trying to reason with human nature and apply topical remedies like church and group therapy sessions and str...
Posted by SIR ANDREW CROCKER on Sat, 09 Feb 2008 03:31:00 PST

To Lucas B., my brother in Christ......

Man, it's been a long time bra. I haven't seen you since I came by your house in my old Honda Accord. Had somebody with me then but I don't remember who it was. I wasn't dating anybody then becau...
Posted by SIR ANDREW CROCKER on Fri, 08 Feb 2008 08:14:00 PST

Roll them fuckin dice........

Feel so irreverent and unholy. Sooooooo good. Feel like driving to Colorado because I have never seen Colorado because when I was a kid my parents were obsessed with Arkansas and Missouri and Texas an...
Posted by SIR ANDREW CROCKER on Fri, 08 Feb 2008 07:55:00 PST

The women that I have slept with......

The women that I have slept with are all still alive and walking around on the earth somewhere, buying groceries and getting frustrated at life and singing out loud in the car when they're by themselv...
Posted by SIR ANDREW CROCKER on Fri, 08 Feb 2008 07:00:00 PST

Muslims want blood and I want pudding.........

First let me say Praise be unto Allah, the beneficient and the merciful, for without His mighty guidance and manifold blessings which He hath so bountifully bestowed upon us none would be the avenue i...
Posted by SIR ANDREW CROCKER on Fri, 08 Feb 2008 06:47:00 PST

Animal like human like possum.....

I hate doing this friends, but I have to share with you that hatred I feel for the sun in the sky after a long night on the rockin' roustabout....... It's like I'm up all night and into the day and ...
Posted by SIR ANDREW CROCKER on Sun, 17 Jun 2007 03:15:00 PST

Home from UNI and elbow to elbow with whining me....

Ah now this is great.....this is real great..... I'm home for Spring Break and ideal head-bound still frames of me coming home from UNI all slim and buffed and learned and read and ripped and railin...
Posted by SIR ANDREW CROCKER on Mon, 19 Mar 2007 08:23:00 PST

Fuck Shakespeare......Praise Urgency....

WEE LITTLE EARTH SHATTERING TRUTH...... GLOBE TOPPLING NUGGET O'KNOWLEDGE.......... It's the same wherever you go no matter where you go and no matter what rung of the big giant whatever the 'you' or...
Posted by SIR ANDREW CROCKER on Fri, 09 Mar 2007 02:10:00 PST