IRAQ, YOU BREAK
i used to finish my sentences but now i....
Stasticly, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape
"a witty saying proves nothing" - some guy
I think I have a lot to offer.
Yet, I think I have no one to offer it too.
And still, I think only one of those statements is false.
But can't decide which.
rain is like rape... if its inevitable just lay back and enjoy it
use drugs as a bridge, not a road
~~~~~She was so pretty I wanted to hit her with a hammer~~~~
do you smell what barack is cookin??
[Trespassers will be violated]
I LIKE MY WOMEN LIKE I LIKE MY SCOTCH - THIRTEEN YEARS OLD AND STORED IN A BASEMENT!!!!!!!!!!!
i tried to find salvation in a booth, but the phone was dead
Suck my drunk, i'm dick
"I" before "E," except in Budwieser
"shit me, im kiss-faced"
im coin-operated
a wise man once told me:
you be jesus.
ill be roman.
and ill nail the shit outta ya.
~~~~~>DRAFT BEER, NOT PEOPLE<~~~~~
--
(its latin)
'''Ich bin ein party animal'''
and i really like riding in the passenger seat of girls cars that don't know how much i like them.
one foot in the hole, one foot getting deeper.
Never cry over spilt milk. It could've been whiskey.
all LIFE really is is a series of organized lines. and LOVE is basically a a few straight lines with a circle in the middle. woo.
"My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle"
Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love ~ woody allen
MEIN SCHWANZ IST AM KLEINSTEN
i use every psychological defense mechanism in the book! fun stuff.
Just because your neighbor can build a better mouse-trap than you and builds his house in the forest doesn't mean that a cat will soon pave its way to your front doorstep.
1stly:
Super Perfundo on the Early Eve of Your Day
alright, who can figure it out???:
Well I'm here and I'm alive. And thats about it I guess. When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
Well, I have a video camera too. Check it out:
http://www.youtube.coma/results?search_query=muzal
heres what we do:
.. >.. ..>
WHAT EVERYONE SHOULD DO ON CHRISTMAS:
(my fav video we've ever made)
PRICELESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i like the color green.
Golden Ripe Boneless Bananas: 39 cents a pound
"No matter how hard you try, you just can't baptize cats." - Psalms 7:28
"Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened."
or here's a good one:
"Not all who wander are lost"
I was just thinking: Serendipity is a pretty cool word. I like it.
"Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional"
Uh, the usual. I have several things...
including hobbies.
I guess you'll just have to find out.
I kinda like eastern philosophy and stuff.
I enjoy arguing with people and things.
also, i need a haircut, but thats a different story.
"How far apart are we supposed to stand
Before we're too uncomfortable to breathe?"
think of this the next time you wash your hair:
Have you found jesus?
Look Here
or Here
I love burning man!!!!
"i think i love you, wont you tell me your name???"
"hello, im good for nothing will you love. me. just. the. same."
If you like the following video (I KNOW I DO) I would seriously consider going HERE
Theres tons of high speed video clips that are fun to watch.
SOUTH KOREA'S GOT SEOUL!!!
KENYA DIG IT?!?!?
The coolest birthday billboard ever:
CLICK TO SEE THE BEST BIRTHDAY GIFT
Mrs. Lisa was so happy.
"Birthdays are good for you; the more you have, the longer you live."
PHRASES OF WISDOM:
Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.
Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.
~It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
~Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
the world is all around us, not just in front of us.
And my two favorites:
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.
Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
and some childhood advice:
"You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk."
Lets get something straight:
WHAT THE HELL
WHAT THE HELL 2
If want to TRAUMATIZE yourself, click here (although i woundn't recomend it) Seriuosly, it's fucking disgusting. You've been warned.
The below image came to me in a dream. And i hereby patent and copyright the following phrase.
Fuck creamy. Creamy sucks.
the pun is mightier than the sword
MYSPACE THE MOVIE!
check it out
Betty Crocker is a racist bitch:
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