Bathroom Ballerina . Bedroom Rockstar . Collingwood Supporter . Fangirl . Guru/Enthusiast . Mullet Head . Muso . Nerd. Netballer . Personal Assistant . Showjumper . Supafriend .
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Eats too much crap. Drinks too much. Sings very badly. Stays up too late. Thinks too much. Talks out of turn. Plays music too loud. Dances like nobody is looking. So rock n roll so corporate suit…
Just like Jem, Laura is truly outrageous. Truly, truly , truly, truly, truly outrageous. Her best friend once told her she was Lily Alen's twin. Because she also has a big mouth and hates men (in the hetrosexual way). At the best of times she can shut up and go all giggly. This has been known to happen in the presence of people of the male variety, particularly those who are appealing to her. Laura plays netball and also enjoys a run along the Yarra River. After Laura recovers from knee reconstructive surgery she will, again, run along said River. Until then she is forced to swim, which she is insanely bad at. Laura is a Collingwood supporter. See that little cross up there? The red one. Yep to the right...if you have a problem with Collingwood supporters, yep click that one. SometimesLauradoesn'tlikeusingthespacebar. The dumbest thing Laura ever did was put a soldering iron on her thumbnail to test if it would hurt. Derh! Laura’s hair is forever changing. Once she had a mullet with bright red through it. But after she got a job with the litigators right up high in the CBD she decided it would probably be best to perhaps go for a more ‘corporate’ look, rather than the ‘80’s really never ended’ look. There is an additional hole through her stomach as well as in various other places. But, like the tattoo on her upper right thigh, you'll probably never see them (unlessyougetherreallydrunkshelikesvodkabytheway). Laura is fairly HTML and computer illiterate. So do not expect much more than a bit of bolding here and there. She also has no desire to learn. So do not attempt to teach. Laura's world pretty much revolves around her two horses and riding them and jumping over insanely large things with them, playing netball, watching football and yelling at the TV, drinking too much then chundering and missing the band, swooning over buff men, chilling with her chums in the hood and listening to the rad tunes. Laura works with the litigators. So don’t piss her off. Laura has a serious problem with the amount of work on her desk. It is because of all this work that Laura drinks so much. She wonders if Workcover will cover her new liver when she eventually needs one. Laura is an unreal cook (just ask her...or her housemates...or her friends who she uses as guinea pigs for new recipes). Laura once discovered she has no desire to become a farmer's wife. The farmers can stay single for all she cares...they should be chasing somebody their own age, anyways. Chris Cheney makes her squee. Go on, test it. Jane is an emo camera whore. Laura gets in the way of all the emo photos. Even when Jane isn't in them. Laura loves teh Melbourne. And the bright lights and the late nights. One of these days Laura will get off her arse and go to University and learn to become The Man so she can take over the world (MUA HA HA). Laura's favourite song is 'Gloria'. Laura likes to put things in asterisks *like this* sometimes she forgets that she is talking and not emailing people when she should be working and speaks like she is putting things *in asterisks*. At Starbucks Laura often goes by the name Billie. Her two best chums will be closely behind. Their alter-egos are Benji and Brian. They are great friends. In time to come they will look back on this moment with much fondness. Laura's car is red and is named Gunta. He once took them to rAdelaide *chortles*. Laura likes to make her musical pal Becc put words into songs. Such as: Origami, Malleable, Bovis, Recumbent and many more. Bovis sits next to Vectis in the rudest word, evah stakes. Laura has magnets on her fridge that say "Rectify Languid Bovis" which is meant as a direction, not a statement. Laura generally likes to obey said statement. Laura has the best bed hair in the world. You're probably jealous of it, too. Laura's favourite movie is Anchorman. Do not try to out-Anchorman quote her. If you do; prepare to lose. Laura dislikes bad grammar and incorrectly constructed sentences. She feels the need to correct them. Always. The sprinkler is the best dance of all time. Cheeseburgers with fries in them is the best hangover cure and whoever invented it needs a medal. Do not attempt to wake Laura before the hour of 11. Even if you come bearing coffee and cigarettes, you may not live to enjoy them. Laura dislikes the smell of fake tan, but is covered in it several times per week. Laura has also developed an addiction to acrylic nails and is attending weekly meetings to combat this addiction. Laura spends 98% of her income on shoes and the other 2% on alcohol. Laura likes shoes. Laura sometimes wishes she had more feet so she could wear more than one pair of shoes at once. Laura gets much enjoyment of talking in the third person...
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Laura
Birthday: 2 January
Birthplace: Carlton, Melbourne.
Current Location: Brunswick, Melbourne.
Eye Color: Bluey-Green. Something inbetween.
Hair Color: Blond. But to you it's black.
Height: 5'5"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Depends on what I'm doing...I mean...right...*shifty eyes*
Your Heritage: Scottish and German.
The Shoes You Wore Today: White Havianas.
Your Weakness: Chocolate and boys. In that Order.
Your Fears: Snakes, spiders and death. Probably not in that order.
Your Perfect Pizza: B-B-Q chicken with stuffed crust, no mushrooms. NOW!
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Quit smoking for good.
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: "Tee-he-he"
Thoughts First Waking Up: "How many sick days do I have left?"
Your Best Physical Feature: Um...
Your Bedtime: When I get there.
Your Most Missed Memory: I have a lot.
Pepsi or Coke: Coke. Pepsi tastes like flyspray.
MacDonalds or Burger King: Donnies. Cheeseburger. Longtime.
Single or Group Dates: Single. It's not a date if the whole world tags along.
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: What's C?
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate. Duh.
Cappuccino or Coffee: Cappuccino is coffee, you moron.
Do you Smoke: I try not to.
Do you Swear: A lot.
Do you Sing: Really badly.
Do you Shower Daily: Who doesn't?
Have you Been in Love: Yep.
Do you want to go to College: Maybe.
Do you want to get Married: I do.
Do you belive in yourself: Sometimes.
Do you get Motion Sickness: Yes. Badly.
Do you think you are Attractive: Not the slightest.
Are you a Health Freak: Fuck no!
Do you get along with your Parents: They go alright for a couple of oldies.
Do you like Thunderstorms: Only when I have somebody to hide behind.
Do you play an Instrument: I dabble. Clarinet, piano and bass.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Yes. And worn it too. Asshat!
In the past month have you Smoked: Yep.
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Nothing illegal.
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Yep.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Bourke Street. What else is one supposed to do on a lunch break?
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: I don't think I've ever had one Oreo. Sheltered life, I know.
In the past month have you eaten Pussy: No. But, thanks for asking.
Have you been on Stage: Yep. I kinda like the attention.
In the past month have you been Dumped: Nope.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: Nup.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Nope.
Ever been Drunk: What kind of question is that?
Ever been called a Tease: Yep. They didn't know what they were talking about.
Ever been Beaten up: Not seriously.
Ever Shoplifted: When I was a badass.
How do you want to Die: I don't.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: A grown up.
What country would you most like to Visit: Germany.
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: As long as they have eyes I'm happy.
Favourite Hair Color: Whatever.
Short or Long Hair: Scruffy. But I don't really care.
Height: Taller than me.
Weight: Like I care.
Best Clothing Style: Wear whatever you want.
Number of Drugs I have taken: Enough to know better.
Number of CDs I own: Eleventy Billion.
Number of Piercings: Six.
Number of Tattoos: One.
Number of things in my Past I Regret: One.
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