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Na

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me

my name is naomi and when i was 13, i had a crush on a 21 year old boy called jonno. and i actually believed i had a chance. at a party, i noticed he had a badge on his jeans that said “namoi river”. but i misread it. i gave him a coy look and said, “why do you have my name embroidered on your bum?”


i used to want to be either a ballerina or a princess but i couldn’t cut the mustard at either, so i decided to become a writer instead. i wrote my first book when i was seven. it’s called “how the seahorse lost his rider” and i illustrated it too. you can buy it here .
i never really stopped writing, and i’m lucky enough to make a (kind of) living out of it. right now i have a novella called “airmail” about to come out, and i’m working on a new novel that requires me to research wine. a lot.
here are a few of my recent articles:
* confessions of a couture junkie
* tequila: beauty & brutality, bottled
* in love with star wars
* tv nostalgia #1: wonder woman
when i was 16 my parents moved to the bush. we lived in a caravan while my dad built the house, and we had no electricity, no running water, no phone and no idea. i wrote a book about it, called "seventeen summers". you can read it here .
i have an unfortunate addiction to good wine, fabulous shoes, beautiful works of art and ridiculous outfits for my dog. i therefore also have a credit card debt. so i do a lot of journalism and copy writing, and produce the odd tvc or documentary, when pressed. if you want to read some of my more serious work you can find it here .
my corporate clients kept asking me how to write (i don't think they wanted to pay me to do it anymore) so i wrote a workbook to teach them how. it's called "talk without being interrupted", and you can order it here .
and no, i'm not really 68. but i'm a lady, so i'm not going to tell you my real age.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

most people are great. i'd like to meet anyone who wants to meet me, famous, anonymous, dead or alive. that said, there are some people i wouldn't want to meet more than once, and a few (you know who you are, crazy dictators, racists and people who hurt puppies) to whom i couldn't promise to be particularly polite.

oh and dear cyber-weirdos: no, i don't want to marry you so that you can live in my country; i'm not interested in writing you 'sweets words'; and i'm definitely not in the mood to spank you. but thanks for asking.

My Blog

Circumcise your Facebook status

I'm all for social media, and blogging, and vlogging, and status updates, and tweets and however the hell you god damn want to express yourself. Go for it, people. I do! But I think I possibly reached...
Posted by on Sat, 27 Jun 2009 06:12:00 GMT

Conversations in a diner

The sign said Best Ribs in Colorado and there was a sculpture of a giant bear on the roof so that clinched it: we went inside for a meal. My new friend and I sat opposite one another across the pl...
Posted by on Thu, 25 Jun 2009 15:00:00 GMT

Up where the air is rare

I walked home through a cottonwood blizzard today. Thats what Nancy called it and she should know, she has lived in Aspen most of her life. Balls of cottonwood the size of fists whirled in gusts so...
Posted by on Wed, 24 Jun 2009 14:59:00 GMT

Lima: a gay old time

Oh no way! cried Jill when we got back to the hotel. You guys went and had lunch at a cute little outdoor café without me?Outdoor, yes. Not exactly cute. More like someone dropped a bomb on the ...
Posted by on Tue, 12 May 2009 11:14:00 GMT

Challenge no.18: rice cream

When I was little, I remember my parents having food arguments. My French-heritage father loved it all: snails, frogs legs, foie gras, tripe& But my mother would reply Darling, not in my house.Th...
Posted by on Sun, 19 Apr 2009 16:58:00 GMT

Seasons in the City

I never really understood the turning of the seasons until I lived in New York. Strange that I had to move to one of the most urban landscapes in the world to finally connect with Mother Natures most...
Posted by on Thu, 19 Mar 2009 16:49:00 GMT

What I do know

New York in July: it's hot, it's smelly, it's dirty, and within five minutes of leaving home the humidity has your hair sticking to your neck in damp swathes. Then you descend the subway steps into a ...
Posted by on Mon, 21 Jul 2008 11:58:00 GMT

A challenge, a quest, a scavenger hunt

NYC has NEVER seen anything like this!New York is a big city, right? I'm a writer from Australia and when I decided to up and move to Manhattan exactly two weeks ago today, I figured I'd have a lot of...
Posted by on Thu, 17 Jul 2008 13:06:00 GMT

Last day at the pub

So... 10 days before I left Sydney for New York, I moved out of my apartment and was technically homeless. Where does one go to live in these circumstances? Why, the Excelsior Pub, of course. This is ...
Posted by on Wed, 02 Jul 2008 08:04:00 GMT

Days Seven & Eight at the pub

So... 10 days before I left Sydney for New York, I moved out of my apartment and was technically homeless. Where does one go to live in these circumstances? Why, the Excelsior Pub, of course. This is ...
Posted by on Sun, 29 Jun 2008 07:45:00 GMT