Im suppose to tell about me and whats going on in my life well here u go. Well things have gone from bad to worse. Im currently residing in a halfway house. Its not as glamorus as it may seem , im bunking up with john voight , and a guy who swears hes Ms.Cleo yes, advisor to the stars, this guys crazy as a box of shit but he can make mac and cheese so good it will make a fat baby fart. Ive kinda been forced into moving here just coming back from my second tour in nam. In which i was a p.o.w , i was held against my will for two years in a rice pattie. Those little yellow bastards really did a number on me. I lost my left leg, three fingers on my left hand and my right arm below my elbow,u try opening a can drink without hating on an asian, there were also mental scars as well. I cant stand being around loud noises, or anyone that looks like william hung, without pissing myself. Dont get much sleep either, im having the same reoccuring dream of a shark eating samuel jackson, the damn shark ate em. But i cant put all the blame on them after i was released i didnt sleep for 3 days because i went on a pcp binge with 2 korean midgets, which landed me in jail for two months, the cops said something about a rude sexual act that involved a goat and a one eyed hooker, but it doesnt sound like anything i would do. Since ive been back i havent really tried to give up any of my addictions, shooting up heroin is a daily thing. And i love chilling with lamont and one eye willy behind the bus station, they always have the coldest wild irish rose in town. Its like frosty the snowman is blowing sweet kisses down my throat. Im trying to hold down a steady job but wal-mart ant really paying what i want,and i hate sitting on the that little soap box they have for me , i feel like im a side show act, plus if i have to say welcome to wal-mart one more fucking time im going to kill me some damn body. Plus my boss wanted me to start up a soccer team for me and my co workers to boost morale , yeah asshole i have one leg. But seeing what i did at my last job to get fired , im happy to have one at all, who knew i couldnt use the bathroom to record a movie staring a blind gurl two german sheppards and alot of baby oil, fuck coronel sanders , ya dick. I have some side projects going but they ant really hitting on shit rite now. Im going to try to get back into tv or movies , before the war i was an extra on Saved By The Bell The College Years,and i was in the last episode of the Fall Guy and i did a Stove Top Stuffin commercial. But my manager says there wanting someone for a lead role as a midget in Gullivers Travels. So im keeping my fingers crossed, and just hoping for the best. Anyway im going to go get some new shoes today, they better give me them bitches half off or at leats two right ones. But all the bad things that have happened to me i ant bitter so if u see me walking by with a tear drop in my eye look away oh yes, baby look away
