Bill

I can try new things. I read books while riding public transportation. I began reading to my kids when they were babies; they now read far above grade level. I brag about my children. I like to draw. I can parallel park and look you in the eye (just not at the same time). I can touch my toes and do 60 push-ups. I have lots of opinions but I know when to keep them to myself. I like board games. I can name all the presidents, but am bad with phone numbers. I like wearing ties, but rarely have a reason to. If I give it some thought, I can be spontaneous. I'd rather print than type. I like to build things and have installed lights and a faucet. I can follow a recipe. I like sarcasm and irony. Really. No kidding.

I have visited six countries (big deal). I can figure stuff out and can patiently wait in line. I don't smoke cigarettes, but smoke adds something to a nightclub, does it not? I don't know why so many politicians don't see the big picture, and lack a knowledge of history. I mourn the decline of vinyl, because I dug the LP covers. But vinyl is coming back! Motown was once the best record label, but Factory had the best record covers. I have been fortunate to meet Ray Davies, Bruce Springsteen, David Letterman, the Edge, Chrissie Hynde, Joe Strummer, R.E.M., Johnny Depp, Stan Lee and Jack Kirby, Exene, two Ramones, three Byrds, Mary Weiss, Lou Reed, Martha Reeves, Kurt Cobain, Joan Jett, Carl Yastrzemski, the Bangles, Henry Rollins, Fiona Apple and lots of fine people no one has ever heard of. Most of those people are (or were) shorter than you think. Joe Jackson and Thurston Moore are taller. When I was a kid, I shook hands with a vice president of the United States, and a few years later with James Brown. I chatted with Ted Nugent once, but didn't tell him that when I was nine, I really did have cat scratch fever, which I got from an iguana. I am OK now.
I have a dog, named Charlie. He once ate my glasses. I drove cross-country by myself, and would like to do it again, but not by myself. The best Bob Dylan show I ever saw was on the "born again" tour. Smallest audience too. I want musicians to be honest, elusive, witty, stubborn and daring. Even bad pizza is OK, but great pizza is sublime. Chicago pizza is the best. I like barbecue too much to be a vegetarian. I need coffee. I put off writing this for a month.