" 1. Eighteen through twenty-five women age like cheese, men age like wine."
2. My expectations of ugly people aren't very high.
3. American women need to go to a foreign country and learn how they're supposed to be treated and maybe they'll come home and act right.
4. Every woman is a whore until she becomes your girl. Then it's all good.
5. If you wake up one morning and there are tampons where your razor and q-tips used to be you know somethings gone drastically wrong in your life.
6. Why does ugly and fat always come together?
7. Married men no longer have an opinion, they're lucky to get the ass once a month and if they don't shut the fuck up they won't even get that.
8. Monkey, the worst thing to happen to man. See Jay Z Kingdom Come track 5.
9. Never buy your girl a watch there's a clock already on the stove.
HI MY NAME IS JOE BROWN AND BITCHES LOVE ME. I HAVE A LOT TO SAY AND ONE DAY I WILL HAVE MY OWN REALITY SHOW AND EVERYONE WILL KNOW WHO I AM. I BELIEVE IN TAKING CARE OF MY BODY SO I STRIVE TO BE A VEGETARIAN ON THE DAYS THAT I AM NOT THAT HUNGRY. I BELIEVE THAT ALL WOMEN HAVE A SELL BY DATE AND IT'S 30. SO IF YOU FIND YOURSELF AT THIS AGE YOU'VE ALREADY SPOILED. SORRY.
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