About Me
Was it their Physicality that drove you mad, was it his/her smell that aroused you? You had no control over your clitoris swelling, the blood rushing towards your penis, pumping your bible. Your palms are sweating, your heart is racing, your loins are moistened as it prepares to receive a pure spirit, energy force. Instantly you know you’ll climax. No question as to whether that person will get you there. The mere thought of that person excites you. You have no thoughts of your committed love , if you
do, your thoughts are fleeting, unstable, flashes if you will.Your committed love doesent defeat this alien feeling. Its kinda like pushing the envelope with danger, your afraid and yet excited and invigorated. In the heat of the moment you choose to follow your heart. Leaving everything to chance. Whatever, who cares, fuckit, you only live once, or do you? Why fight your innate urge to love when moved to do so? Is it right that we fight it? Are we merely confusing what is? Some say the ultimate sacrifice is the
commitment to one person, God, divine order, universal love. Could ones commitment to another be a commitment to a mirrored image of self?Ultimately, by committing to another you contribute to your own development as a being, you can say its an extended session with a pyshco therapist. Constantly facing your demons per your partner’s perception of you. Can you with stand the truth of your partners view of you? Do you learn to move forward with, or do you simply change your ways, habits, thoughts, belief system and or understandings of you for the sake of the relationship? Appeasing, believing, pleasing whom?Imagine for a second, you are happy, in love, living your so called dream, ignorant to all that surrounds you, blissful and serene in content and texture. Suddenly, without a moments notice you are struck in your soul your core being like nothing you’ve ever experienced. That man that woman walking down the street. Penetrates your eyes, says the right thing at the right frequency.Without missing a beat, all that you thought you wouldn’t do, you will do. All that you thought you were you aren’t. Now you stand naked for all to see as you have been catapulted in the moment the movement of possibilities. Eyes eventually shying a way, only to find themselves systematically stealing glances as you come to know stillness. Your heart, your mind and your soul unearths crumbling planes of now. Your sense of practicalities, common sense and knowing, challenges your shadows of being, forcing real player time and the understanding of here and now. Slowly possibilities reveal its precence.Just when you’ve crossed the road, just when you were
beginning to soar, just when you were, just when you understood, I AM. The sense of being complacent and a slow heaviness invades the knowing of I AM. Conjuring visits of commitment, belonging to and being spoken for. Forcing you to choose the word “commitment†as your reasoning for why you cant, Mind you, your attraction is not just physical but its something else, lucent, non tangible, something in their eyes, their smell something that draws you but because you are conditioned, your defined reality creeps in your veins, seeping into the flow of your blood convincing your brain of your committed love.Blocking your spirit soul’s chance to explore infinite possibilities. Conceding to the rules of engagement. you said you were committed to him/her. You confessed your love, your soul for the rest of your journey on this planet. Are we simply fooling ourselves? Have our rules of
love contained us? Are we truly able to grow? Have we been halted? Are we to love, leave, let go or move on as inspired? How do we get to the ultimate unconditioned love? Can we really love blindly and adhere to the rules of commitment?RENNIE HARRIS
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