Against all my inclinations I took that one breath the moment when you breath right before it all happens what is to come you can only guess but what you hope to come you know with unmatched certainty As you hold your breath everything happens to fast it slips through your hands and you quickly realize you have no control you are at the mercy of life and the hands of the one you have decided to blindly trust the pain and hurt of those before quickly become faint whispers as you become obsessed with the future and in that one breath you begin to fall the warmth found in his arms the delicacy of his skin the calm you can now only reach with the touch of his lips the ecstasy he creates as he pulls me close holding me tight my body screams for him to explore ever crevice to awaken my senses and set my entire body on fire running my hands through his hair passionately locking our lips together a moment I beg to never end as if I have taken a bite of a poison apple how I wish I could have the peace that Snow White felt in a never-ending sleep but I continue to fall and now I must catch my breath I was hoping that I would finally exhale as I got lost in the beauty of his eyes but instead as if I have fallen from a building top as I hit the cold hard concrete with the sheer force that I wish would simply kill me the pain as cold as ice as if a stake has pieced my heart reality quickly kicks me as I am down my body scream out in agony begging me to finally exhale my anger can no longer be contained and I scream out releasing my every emotion as the oxygen fills my lungs my heart beats as if it will jump out of my chest I begin to blame myself for putting myself yet again in such a venerable state as I look up I realize that you pushed me you were scared you were confused and you were weak you pushed me away it was easier than being honest with yourself but I survived and now you are left alone on top of that building with only your demons and insecurities to haunt you and in you breaking me I was forced to heal myself to face my fears and confront my demons I have only grown and because of you I am now better prepared to handle what will be thrown at me next
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..Who am I... that is something I'm rediscovering. It's strange how you think you can really know yourself and yet life throughs you through a loop whole and you find yourself once again rediscovering life. I'm in a transitional period right now. Rediscovering who I am, what I what and were I'm going. Forget the 10 year plan... just living everyday as it comes.
