Lifting weights, eating healthy, fantasy sports, New York Mets, New Jersey Devils, New York Giants, New York Knicks, music, books, and sleep.
Fake people who are really into small talk and ask a shit load of idiotic questions.
The Big Lebowski, Rain Man, The Departed, Bowling for Columbine, Rounders, Super Size Me, Fahrenheit 9/11, Amelie, Office Space, Zoolander, Groundhog Day, Meet the Parents, Super Troopers, Old School, Freddy Got Fingered, Airplane, Christmas Vacation, Fletch, Death Wish, Taxi Driver, Trainspotting, Goldmember, Secretary, Ronin, PCU, Team America: World Police, all Steven Seagal movies.
Seinfeld, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Sportscenter, PTI, The Simpsons, UFC/Pride fighting, Da Ali G Show, Jeopardy!
Dan Brown, Kurt Vonnegut, Chuck Palahniuk, Noam Chomsky, Howard Zinn, The Contortionist's Handbook, A Million Little Pieces, My Friend Leonard, Me Talk Pretty One Day, The Kite Runner, Turn of the Screw, On the Road, Animal Farm, 1984, Fahrenheit 451, Marabou Stork Nightmares, The Great Gatsby, Post Office, Broken Summers, Zen Meditation Plain and Simple, anything by Poe, Webster's Dictionary, medical dictionaries.
My parents, John Lennon, Fugazi, Larry David, all my close friends, anyone who makes something out of nothing.