i'm just an old man with a hot young girlfriend, whom i love very much. i am also an ex semi-rockstar who played the guitar for the amazing O.C. ska band, jeffries fan club. i was captain of the valencia high school drum line. i did two tours in NAM with my friend chris rush (we were lucky to make it out alive...ask him about it if you ever have the chance). i majored in visual communication (graphic design) yet i am an accountant for a failing mortgage company....ummmm keep your comments to yourself. Anyways, i updated the useless facts section, i kept my favorites and added some new ones...so enjoy.
an office desk has 400 times more bacteria than a toilet. (come on kids. stop pooping on the desk)
it’s estimated that at any one time, around 0.7% of the world’s population is drunk. (just so you know, thats about 42,000,000 people at one time...stay off the roads damn alcoholics).
during the female orgasm, endorphines are released, which are powerful painkillers. so headaches are in fact a bad excuse not to have sex.
if you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die. If you keep your eyes open by force, they can pop out. (DON’T TRY IT, DUMBASS)
if you put a drop of liquor on a scorpion, it will instantly go mad and sting itself to death. (let me tell you i've been stung by one of those bastards and this little fact would have been nice to know).
every day, the average person swallows about a quart of snot. (1 US quart = 32 US fluid ounces... thats about 2.5 cans of soda)
a sneeze can travel as fast as one hundred miles per hour.
approximately 1-2 calorie are burned a minute while watching T.V.
tobacco kills more Americans each year than alcohol, cocaine, crack, heroin, homicide, suicide, car accidents, fire and AIDS combined.
children who are breast fed tend to have an IQ seven points higher than children who are not. Suddenly I'm thirsty. Waiter, another round of boobies please.
an ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated. (who is giving the ants alcohol????).
and last but not least...a person uses approximately fifty-seven sheets of toilet paper each day. (some more than others)