Hawaiian Boy

I'd like to meet:

I'd like 2 meet 1 person... YO MAMA I'd like to see my girlfrindfamily guy futurama YO MAMA... Yo mama so fat, her belt size was equator Yo mama so fat she sits in two time zones Yo mama so fat, when she jumped in the air and got stuck Yo mama so fat, she causes a blackout when she sits Yo mama so fat, she step on a scale it says to be continued.... Yo mama so fat, people jogged the marathon around her Yo mama so fat, God couldn't light earth till she moved Yo mama so fat, she went on a date with high heels and came back with sandals Yo mama so fat, her beeper went off and people thought she was backing up Yo mama so fat she buys to airline tickets Yo mama so fat, her blood type is Ragu Yo mama so fat, she went bungee jumping and went straight to hell Yo mama so fat, we're in her right now Yo mama so fat, she lies on the beach and no one else gets any sun Yo mama so fat, that when she went to the movies she sat next to everyone Yo mama so fat, when you get on top of her, your ears pop Yo mama so fat, she put on lipstick with a paint roller Yo mama so fat, she broke her leg and gravy poured out Yo mama so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made skittles Yo mama so supid, he got hit by a parked car Yo mama so stupid she triped over a cordless phone Yo mama so stupid, she got locked in a grocery store and starved Yo mama so stupid, she put m&;m's in alphabetical order Yo mama so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund Yo mama so stupid, she sold her car for gasoline money Yo mama so stupid, she stole free bread from the baker Yo mama so stupid, it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 minuites Yo mama so stupid, she bought a silence car alarm Yo mama so stupid, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept Yo mama so stupid, she took the pepsi challenge and chose jif Yo mama so stupid, she thought Boyz || men was a day care center Yo mama so stupid, she stands up on an empty bus Yo mama so stupid, she went to Disneyworld and saw that sign Disneyworld left, so she went home Yo mama so stupid, when the computer said "press any key to continue" she could'nt find the any key Yo mama so stupid, she got a doughnut and returned it cause it got a hole in it YO MAMA SO FAT.... she fell in love...and broke it!!! she has to put on her belt with a boomarang! I have to take a train, a plane, and 2 buses to get on her good side! a picture of her fell off the wall! her tailor takes her measurements in light years! her picture takes two frames! her favorite blouse is a tent! her driver's license says "Picture continued on other side."! when she goes to a restaurant, she even orders the "Thank You, Come Again." ! even her shadow has stretch marks! when she gets on the scale it says "To be continued." ! her blood type is rocky-road! her blood type is Ragu! one day when she got in a fight and the person fighting her got lost in her! she could sell shade! she DJ's for the ice cream truck! she eats cereal out of a satellite dish! she has to keep pesos in one pocket and yen in the other! she has to iron her pants on the driveway! after she got off the carousel, the horse limped for a week! when she ran away they had to use all four sides of the milk carton! when the police showed her a picture of her feet, she couldn't identify them! when the cashier at KFC asked what size bucket she wanted, she said the one on the roof! she sweats Crisco! she uses bacon for Band-aids! when she goes to the drycleaners and hands in her underwear they say "sorry no parachutes accepted"! that if she weighed 5 more pounds she could get group insurance! when she went to the Rose Parade everyone thought she was a float! when she wears heels, they're flats by the afternoon! when she went to get a water bed, they put a blanket across the great lakes! when she wears a yellow raincoat, people run after her and call "Taxi!"! when she wears a yellow raincoat, kids line up behind her thinking she's the school bus! when she wears a red dress kids yell "Hey Kool-Aid Man."! when she was diagnosed with the flesh eating disease, the doctor gave her 7 years to live! when she was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks! she cut her leg and gravy dripped out! she can lay down or stand up and her height doesn't change! one day she was cleaning out her rolls and a car fell out! NASA orbits satellites around her! on a scale of 1 to 10, she's a 747! I've got to tell two snaps just to cover her fat ass! I saw her in New York, and when I told my friend in LA, he said he'd seen her too! I saw a picture of her in a magazine on page 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8! I ran around her twice and got lost! she got hit by a truck and asked "Who threw that rock?"! she goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu, and says "Okay."! she fell in the Grand Canyon and got stuck! she fell off a boat and the captain yelled "Land Ho!"! I gotta take 3 steps back just to see all of her! her belly button doesn't have lint, it has sweaters! her belly jiggle is the first ever perpetual motion machine! her belt size is the equator! even God couldn't raise her spirits! even Richard Simmons laughs at her! every time she wears high heels, she strikes oil! her car is made of spandex! her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard! her college graduation picture was an aerial! all of her clothes have to be custom made by a contractor! her skates went flat! she has to use sleeping bags for tube socks! she jumped for joy and got stuck! she jumped up in the air and got stuck! she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagen! she looks like the Stay-Puff marshmallow man on steroids! she made weight watchers go blind! she makes sumo wrestlers look anorexic! she pulls up a chair to an all-u-can-eat buffet! she puts mayonnaise on aspirin! she puts on her lipstick with a paint-roller! she don't know whether she's walking or rolling! at the zoo, the elephants started throwing her peanuts! when she turns around, people throw her a welcome back party! when she goes swimming she gives the pool streach marks! when she walks across the living room, the radio skips! when she went to the beach Greenpeace tried to haul her back into the ocean! you can pinch an inch on her forehead! when she travels, she's gotta make two trips! when she takes a shower, her feet don't get wet! when she walks in front of the T.V., you miss 5 minutes of your show! when she wears corduroy pants, the ridges don't show! you can't even see her legs, it just looks like she's gliding across the floor! when she steps on a scale, it says "One at a time, please."! when she saw a yellow bus going down the road she yelled "Hey! Stop that Twinkie."! when she played hide-n-go-seek, she hid behind a water tower! when she runs she makes the CD player skip... at the radio station! when she ordered a "My Size Meal" at McDonald's they gave her the key to the store! when she hauls ass, she has friends come help! when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips! when she ordered a "My Size Meal" at McDonald's they gave her a dinosaur! when she goes to the circus she sees the big top and asks "Where can I try that on?" ! when she goes to the beach, little kids yell "Free Willy, Free Willy."! when she goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate! when she gets in an elevator, it has to go down! YO MAMA SO STUPID... she orders a cheese burger from 'McDonalds' and says "hold the cheese"! she studied for a blood test and failed! she thought a lawsuit was something you wear to court. she thought meow mix was a record for cats. she took lessons for a player piano. she tried to wake up a sleeping bag. she spent 30 minutes lookin' at an orange juice box because it said 'concentrate'! at the bottom of an application where it says 'Sign Here' - she put Sagittarius! if you gave her a penny for her thoughts you'd get change she asked me, "What's the number for 911?"! she got hit by a cup and told the police that she got mugged! she put a ruler on her pillow to see how long she slept! she sold the car for gas money! she took a spoon to the Super Bowl! she tried to drown herself in a carpool! she tried to steal a free sample! she was on the corner giving out potato chips yellin' "Free Lays!" ! when she heard 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved! when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line, she put "O.K."! when she took you to the airport and a sign said "Airport Left," she turned around and went home! when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead! when I told her to "Take the trash out," she moved! you can tell when she's used the computer because there's White Out all over the screen! when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon! when she saw the "NC-17 (Under 17 Not Admitted)" sign, she went home and got 16 friends! she wouldn't know up from down if she had three guesses! they had to burn the school down to get her out of 3rd grade! when I said we were playing craps she went and got toilet paper! she thought Sherlock Holmes was a housing project! she thought Thailand was a men's clothing store! she thought the board of education was a piece of wood! she thinks Tiger Woods is a forest! she thinks Johnny Cash is a pay toilet! she asked me, "what's that letter after X" and I said Y she said "Cause I want to know"! she ordered her sushi well done! she died before the police arrived because she couldn't find the "11" button in "9-1-1"! if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless! it takes her an hour to cook minute rice! she got hit by a parked car! she sold the house to pay the mortgage! she tried to drown a fish! she tripped over a cordless phone! when she saw a "Wrong Way" sign in her rearview mirror, she turned around! she'd have to be twice as smart to become a half-wit! when the judge said "Order in the court," she said "I'll have a hamburger and a Coke."! when her husband lost his marbles she bought him new ones! when she worked at McDonald's and someone ordered small fries, she said "Hey Boss, all the small one's are gone."! she thinks Christmas Wrap is Snoop Dogg's holiday album! she thought asphalt was a skin disease! she sent me a fax with a stamp on it! she put on a coat to chew winterfresh gum! she couldn't tell which way an elevator was going if I gave her two guesses! if brains were dynamite, she wouldn't have enough to blow her nose! I saw her walking down the street yelling into an envelope, I asked what she was doing, and she said sending a voice mail! she went to the Gap to get her teeth fixed! she went to a Whalers game to see Shamu! she thought the Internet was something you catch fish with! she thought Boyz2Men was a daycare center! she asked for a price check at the dollar store! she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jiff! she got fired from the M&;M factory for throwing away all the W's! that under "Education" on her job application, she put "Hooked on Phonics."! she put a peephole in a glass door! she was locked in a grocery store and starved to death! she thought a quarterback was a refund! she went to a Clippers game to get a hair cut! when I gave her a dollar and asked for a quater back, she gave me Dan Marino! she thought she could get food stamps at the post office! she tried to kill a bird by throwing it off a cliff! she tried to mail a letter with food stamps! I saw her in the frozen food section with a fishing rod! it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes! she thought hamburger helper came with another person! I told her Christmas was just around the corner and she went looking for it! she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican Phone Company! she can't make Jello because she can't fit 2 quarts of water in the box! she called the 7-11 to see when they closed! when we drove past the YMCA she said "Hey look, they spelled macy's wrong!" she jumped off a building in attempt to fly because she thought her maxi pad had wings! the worst six years of her life were grade three! she got locked in a bathroom and peed her pants! YO MAMA SO UGLY... she didn't get hit with the ugly stick, she was beaten with the ugly log! kids dress up as her for Halloween! she makes blind children cry! you could stick her face in dough and it would make monster cookies! I took her to the zoo and the guy at the door said "Thanks for bringing her back."! if you looked up ugly in the dictionary her picture would be next to it! people hang her picture in their cars so their radios don't get stolen! people hang her picture in their basements to scare the rats away! she looked out the window and the police fined her for mooning! her shadow ran away from her! I took her to a haunted house and she came out with a job application! I took her to a haunted house and she came out with a pay check! people at the circus pay money not to see her! she looks like her face caught on fire and they put it out with a fork! that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects! that she went to an ugly contest and they said "sorry no professionals"! just after she was born, her mama said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."! her face is closed on weekends! her dentist treats her by mail-order! she threw a boomerang and it wouldn't even come back! the government moved Halloween to her birthday! when she looks in the mirror, the reflection ducks! when she was lying on the beach, the cat tried to bury her! that if ugly were an Olympic event, she would be the dream team! when she passes by a bathroom the toilet flushes! they put her face on box of Ex-Lax and sold it empty! she's never seen herself 'cause the mirrors keep breaking! she looks like she's been in a dryer filled with rocks! she looks like she got hit with a bag of "What the fuck?!?!"! she hurts my feelings! she gets 7 years bad luck when ever trying to look at herself in the mirror! Rice Krispies won't talk to her! even the elephant man paid to see her.! even the tide won't come back in! that if ugly were a crime, she'd get the electric chair! your dad takes her to work just so he doesn't have to kiss her good-bye! when she was born she was put in an incubator with tinted windows! they rub tree branches on her face to make ugly sticks! she has to trick or treat over the phone! she gives Freddy Kreuger nightmares! my dog took one look at her and ran away! her pillow cries at night! she has a sign in her yard that says "Beware of Dog."! that when she was a baby, her parents had to feed her with a slingshot! you're dad first met her at the pound! when she was born, the doctor slapped her and her parents! she tied a pork chop around her neck and the dog still wouldn't play with her! if she were a scarecrow, the corn would run away! it looks like she ran the 100 yard dash in a 90 yard gym! they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints! when she moved into the projects, all her neighbors chipped in for curtains! when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillance cameras! she has to creep up on water to get a drink! her mama had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dog to play with her! they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars! they know what time she was born, because her face stopped the clock! she practices birth control by leaving the lights on! we put her in the kennel when we go on vacation! the psychiatrist makes her lie face down! Greenpeace mistook her for an endangered elephant! her face is like a peice of modern art you can't tell what it is! Medusa is jealous! her picture is on the inside of a Roach Motel! she could scare the moss off a rock!! she has to creep up on her makeup! it looks like she's been bobbing for french fries! when she was born the doctor smacked everyone! when she walks in the kitchen, the rats jump on the table and start screaming! it looks like she fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down! YO MAM SO OLD... her memory is in black &; white! I told her to act her age, and she died! I asked to see her birth certificate, and she handed me a rock! she owes Fred Flintstone a food stamp! Jurassic Park brought back memories! the key on Ben Franklin's kite was to her apartment! she has all the apostles in her black book! she DJ'd at the Boston Tea Party! she needed a walker when Jesus was still in diapers! she went to an antique auction and three people bid on her! she walked into an antique store and they kept her! I've seen stale rasins with less wrinkles! she's got hieroglyphics on her driver's license! if she were a car it would be time to roll back her odometer! she drove a chariot to high school! she took her drivers test on a dinosaur! she used to baby-sit Yoda! vultures constantly circle her house! it looks like the Wrinkle Fairy tap-danced on her face! they ask to check her bags... and she's not carrying any luggage! YO MAMA SO POOR... I saw her kicking a can down the street, and when I asked her what she was doing she said "moving"! I saw her hanging the toilet paper out to dry! your family eats cereal with forks to save on milk! she can't afford to pay attention!her face is on the front of a foodstamp! when she goes to Kentucky Fried Chicken she has to lick other people's fingers! when I ring the doorbell she says,"DING!" she went to McDonald's and put a milkshake on layaway! she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning! she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, "What are you doing?" She said, "Buying luggage."! when I ring the doorbell I hear the toilet flush! YO MAMA SO SKINNY... she has to wear a belt with her spandex! she turned sideways and disappeared! you could blind-fold her with dental floss! she hula hoops with a cheerio! she can see out the peephole with both eyes! you can save her from drowning by tossing her a Cheerio! she had to stand in the same place twice to cast a shadow! she has to run around in the shower to get wet! I gave her a piece of popcorn and she went into a coma! instead of calling her your parent, you call her transparent! she swallowed a meatball and thought she was pregnant! she can dodge rain drops! she inspires crack whores to diet! she uses Chapstick for deodorant! her bra fits better backwards! if she had a yeast infection she'd be a Quarter Pounder with Cheese! OTHER Your mama's glasses are so thick, she can see into the future! Your mama's glasses are so thick, that when she looks on a map she can see people waving! Your mama's house is so dirty, she has to wipe her feet before she goes outside! Your mama's so clumsy, she got tangled up in a cordless phone! Your mama's so hairy, she looks like a Chia pet with a sweater on! Your mama's so nasty, she made right guard turn left! Your mama's so nasty, she made speed stick slow down! Your mama's so nasty, when she goes to a hair salon, she told the stylist to cut her hair and she opened up her shirt! Your mama's so hairy, she shaves with a weedwacker! Your mama's so hairy, she got a trim and lost 10 pounds! Your mama's so hairy, her armpits look like she has Don King in a head lock! Your mama's so hairy, they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower! Your mama's so hairy, Bigfoot took a picture of her! Your mama talks so much her mouth is like a convenience store, open 24 hours a day! Your mama's so lazy she doesn't walk in her sleep, she hitch hikes! Your mama's has so many vericose veins her body could double as a road map! Your mama's hair is so greasy you could fry a chiken in it! Your mama's nose is so big the last time I saw one like it, it was attached to an elephant! Your mama's feet are so big she could get a job helping Smokey the Bear stomp out forest fires! Your mama's feet are so stanky she should be charged with sock abuse! Your mama's mouth is so big it takes her an hour to put on her lipstick! Your mama's so short she needs a ladder to reack the curb! Yo Mama So Ugly 1. she put the Boogie man outta business. she make Michael Jackson look like Brad Pitt when she wobbles down the street in September, folk say, "Damn it, can't believe it's Halloween already..." when she applied for the ugly contest they told her 'NO Professionals' she looked out her window and was arrested for indecent exposure! miutes after she was born her Mother shouted 'What a treasure!" and her Poppa said "Yes, now let's go and bury her..." they push her face into the dough mixture when making Monster cookies. when they took her to the Beautician it took 10 hours....and that was just for the quote! yer Daddy takes her to work each day so he doesny have to kiss her goodbye... she put Marilyn Manson out of business. she was a guard at Snake Mountain they knew what time she was born cuz her face stopped the clock... even Harry Knowles refused to date her. they embalmed her face on a box of super-strength laxatives and sold it empty! she gets 364 extra days just to dress up for Halloween. Tony Blair moved Halloween to her birthday. you papa throws the ugly stick and she goes fetches it every time. she scared the stitching outta Frankenstein. we had to tie a steak round her neck so the dogs would play with her. I heard yer Father first met her at the Zoo. her shadow gave up. people at the Zoo pay cash so they DON't have to see her... her mom had to be Pissed drunk just to breast feed her. when born, the doctors had to fit her incubator with tinted windows. hotel managers use her picture to keep away the Rats. instead of round the ankles, they put the Bungee Jumping cord round her neck. they gave her a middle name...'accident'. she fell out of the Ugly Tree, hitting every branch on the way down. when she walked into the Haunted House, she came back out with a Job Application! even Slicky Willy Clinton refused to sleep with her... when she was born the Doc smacked her face. You Momma so Ugly that she's got her very own Crazy Pranks &; Hilarious Gags named after her... Yo Mama So Stupid 1. I told her drinks were on the house...so she went and got a ladder... she make Homer Simpson look like a Nobel Prize winner she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Cif. she noticed a sign reading 'Wet Floor'...so she just did! it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes. when you were born, she looked at your umbilical cord and said, "Wow, it comes with cable too!" she asked for a refund on a jigsaw puzzle complaining it was broken. she got locked in the Quickie Mart and nearly starved to death. she sold her Car for Petrol cash! she reckoned a Quarterback was a refund... she once attempted to commit suicide by jumping off a Kerb. she leaves tell tales signs she's been using my computer - white out (tipp ex) is on the screen. she took a job cutting grass on an Oil Rig. I found her peaking over a glass wall to see what was on the other side. it took her 2 days to make Microwaveable Pot Noodles. she invented a silent car alarm. that when you stand beside her you can actually hear the ocean she really thought the cinema was selling Free Willies... she watches The Three Stooges and takes notes. she was born on Halloween and can't remember her birthday. she thought Morning Dew was a New York radio station. she lost her shadow. she went to a Whalers game to see Kiko. she somehow got fired from a Blow-Job she thought Hot Meals were stolen food. she make Laurel and Hardy look like Nobel Prize winners. when I asked her to purchase me a Colour TV she asked me...'Which colour?' Your Mama So Fat 1. when she step on the Weight Scales it says...'to be continued'... she once went on a seafood diet...whenever she saw food she ate it! folk exercise by jogging around her! when she bends over, we enter Daylight Saving Time. she sat on a Nintendo Gamecube and it turned into a gameboy she make Kiko the Whale look like a Smartie NASA plan to use her to shore up the hole in the Ozone layer she was measured at 38-26-36 and that was just the left arm... small objects orbit her. she make olympic sumo wrestlers look anerixic. when I tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips. when she farted she launched herself into orbit. she lost a game at Hide&;Seek only cos I spotted her...behind Mount Everest. when I had to swerve to avoid hitting her on the road I ran out of Petrol! she could be the eighth continent. she nearly put Safeway out of business the only thing that's attracted to her is gravity. her Uni graduation photo was an aerial when she auditioned for a part in Raiders of the Lost Ark she got the part of the big Rolling Ball. she make Jabba the Hutt look anorexic. her fave food is seconds. her belt size is Equator. she eats Desert out of a Trash Can lid she wears an 'X' jacket and Copters attempt to land on her she shows up on radar. she needs a map to find her butt. she fell into the Grand Canyon....and got stuck! she wears an asteroid belt. her Passport photo says 'Picture is continued overleaf' she has TB ... 2 bellys. she's once, twice, three times a lady. she was in the Daily Record last week on page 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9. the circus use her as a trampoline stunt agencies use her as an air mattress when she opens the Fridge it says - 'I give up...' she got a new gig at the Cinema...she works as the screen she once told me 'I could eat a horse'...believe me, she wasn't kidding! she deep fries her toothpaste