The name is Kevin aka KD Fiction, the writer, the photographer, the director, the counselor, the musician. I grew up in the small town of Aberdeen and ended up getting my degree in Psychology from the University of Maryland. I spent the last couple of years living in LA and now am back in the greater Northwest.
I am into the outdoors, hiking, camping, kayaking, maybe even a little rock climbing. I could spend all day watching ESPN, but I could also spend all day on the basketball court making it rain threes on some hoes.
I have a great, tight circle of friends who are damn near like family to me, most of them I would actually call brothers.
I never answer my phone, so I prefer if you send me an email or a myspace or a text message. I don’t know why, but for whatever reason I prefer it that way. And if I do answer my phone when you do call, then consider yourself pretty special, because I don’t do that for everyone.
And for reference since there is no spot available for favorite sports teams, here are mine. Philadelphia Eagles for the NFL, UW and the NBA is absolutely dead to me right now. I feel so fucking lied to and betrayed, also by the city I call my home now, as my girlfriend says I need to get over it, but there needs to be healing time, then in the English Premier League I’m pretty torn between Aston Villa and Chelsea. Oh yeah and for MLB and NHL it’s the Mariners or Canucks.
And if you want to know anything else, you know what to do.
Favorite Quotes:
"No regrets, that's my motto... that and everyone Wang Chung tonight."
"I will take your mother out to a nice seafood dinner and NEVER call her again!"
"I don't mean to stare. We don't have to breed. We can plant a house or we can build a tree. I don't even care, we can do all three. She said."
"And Shepherds we shall be. For thee, my Lord, for thee. Power hath descended forth from Thy hand Our feet may swiftly carry out Thy commands. So we shall flow a river forth to Thee And teeming with souls shall it ever be. In Nomeni Patri Et Fili Spiritus Sancti"
"We could kill everybody."
"There'll be banana hammocks everywhere!"
"Dude, I don't know if we can trust road signs anymore, they all seem to lie to us... They just want us to fucking run out of gas!"
"Man, you can't fuck a hamster."
"They play D like a 5 year old girl plays tea party."
"Oh yes, it's a onesie."
"the only actions, thoughts, and desires you have any influence over are your own. As long as you act in such a way that you can be proud of, it doesn't matter what another person thinks - you did the right thing, and you should find solace in that."
"She will be mine again, oh yes, she will be mine again."
"Every man at some point in his life is going to lose a battle. He's going to fight, and he's going to lose. But what makes him a man is that in the midst of that battle, he does not lose himself."
"Hell yeah. I never lived with a white person before. Dude it will be awesome cause then my credit will get better, I can be as loud as I want and no one will complain cause I have a white guy that lives with me and that makes it ok. Dude I’ll even get to ride in the carpool lane now."
"That is the nicest thing a beer induced hallucination has ever said to me... let us be chums."
"How about I get some dong bags and we can knock boots later?"
"I only have a few years left to live... I don't want to spend them dead."
"Well I have to admit I've had that one in my back pocket for some time. FINALLY someone has compared me to the Atlanta Hawks! Years of planning have finally paid off!"
"So I woke up at 8 AM this morning and I don't know why. I want to know why I woke up at 8 o'clock and why I woke up in a phone booth. So I called my wife and asked her why I woke up in a phone booth. She said I was an alcoholic... then the bitch hung up on me."
"The amount of liquor I drank last night would have killed a small- to medium-sized Asian family."
"Children are like TV sets. When they start acting weird, whack them across the head with a big rubber basketball shoe."
"And I said, 'Hey Lama, how 'bout a little something, you know, for the effort?' And he says, 'There won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed you will receive total consciousness.' So I got that going for me ... which is nice."
"I have three rules which I live by: Never get less than 12 hours sleep, never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city, and never go near a lady with a tattoo of a dagger on her hand. Now you stick with that, and everything else is cream cheese."
"On this Father's Day, we'd like to wish all you fathers out here a happy birthday."
"Just when they think they got all the answers, I change the questions."
"The only time I want to talk to a woman when I'm naked is if I'm on top of her or she's on top of me."
"Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son."
"Freaking Mormons, totally undependable!"
"In 2024, President Eli Manning will live at the Wal-Mart House, Presented by Home Depot."
"Ask a deeply religious Christian if he’d rather live next to a bearded Muslim that may or may not be plotting a terror attack, or an atheist that may or may not show him how to set up a wireless network in his house. On the scale of prejudice, atheists don’t seem so bad lately."
"When you encounter seemingly good advice that contradicts other seemingly good advice, ignore them both."
"I wonder if in the porn industry they use the saying "it's all fun and games until someone loses an eye!" I wonder if that's ever happened? Or atleast gone blind? We should do a survey."
"Excess on occasion is exhilarating. It prevents moderation from acquiring the deadening effect of a habit."
"Every person you meet or talk to, everything you do, ever decision completely changes your entire future. Fate exists to some extent, it intervenes when needed. But for the most part there is point A and point B. A is birth. B is death. Life is the just the entangled string of being in the middle of it all."
"I have a rock garden. Last week three of them died."
"Don't you hate when you screw up calling someone else stupid?"
"You forgot to add the silent izzle."
"Turning left off an elevator is wrong, you're supposed to go right. Going left is just morally wrong."
"If your not going to succeed at what you're doing, then you might as well have unattainable goals"
"No more sprinkles because they get in my cleavage and my keyboard."
"I like being black, it's like being white, but with disadvantages."
