I'm Rick James, bitch! - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I was born in Romania, the son of a gypsy king and an Italian prostitute. I spent my early years travelling the world, making televisions out of sticks whenever i needed money to support my drug habit. In the 1980's, I was the voice of KITT, the car out of Knight Rider. It was on set where i met my girlfriend Kerry, we moved to Australia, and now we have three kids, Ruby, Olivia and Cassidy. Three goats, two dogs, one chook and one cat. I'm one of the worlds greatest drivers on super nintendo mario cart and 64. In times of stress, i've been known to wear socks with sandals, tip turtles upside down and eat lettuce with sugar on it. Don't judge me...lest ye be judged yourself ..

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

the person who killed me in my previous life. I was only 24, running my own business, i had the world at my fingertips, as they say...it was most disappointing

My Blog

Stuff and things

If a mute kid signed a swear word, would his mum make him wash his hands? And how does a blind person know when they've finished wiping their bum?
Posted by on Sun, 12 Aug 2007 21:25:00 GMT

Connect Four

I'm going to share with you something that i feel is equal, if not better, than anything that anybody has ever done. I can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves...and if that's not enough, i'...
Posted by on Wed, 08 Aug 2007 21:00:00 GMT

Muslim birthday party

I just got home from my first muslim birthday party. Musical chairs was a bit slow, but pass the parcel was intense!
Posted by on Mon, 06 Aug 2007 01:53:00 GMT

Ducks, the funniest of all animals

It is has been statistically proven that if you include a duck in any animal joke, it will be funny. I'll prove my point, what is the difference between a duck? One of it's legs is both the same... Se...
Posted by on Fri, 03 Aug 2007 02:57:00 GMT

Homeless people and the environment, according to Dan

According to former U.S Vice President Dan Quayle, a person is not homeless if they are sleeping on the streets of their home town...he also stated that "it isn't pollution that's harming the environm...
Posted by on Thu, 28 Jun 2007 18:05:00 GMT

Albino goldfish

Did you know that if you leave a goldfish in a dark room, after a few days it will begin to turn white...
Posted by on Fri, 22 Jun 2007 03:58:00 GMT

Stephen Hawking

I'd like to meet Stephen Hawking. We could argue about what is inside a black hole and the space/time continium. Whoever wins an arm wrestle at the end of the night, shall be deemed the Super Brain of...
Posted by on Mon, 14 May 2007 19:59:00 GMT

threesomes

Here's some observational humour for you. Don't you hate it when you're having a threesome, and the least attractive girl whispers in your ear, 'save it all for me...'
Posted by on Wed, 02 May 2007 00:37:00 GMT

Growing old?

To prolong the effects of ageing, I have taken to spending four hours a day in a meat freezer. I recommend wearing gloves and thick socks also...
Posted by on Thu, 26 Apr 2007 22:17:00 GMT

You, my dear reader...

Who are you? Am i just wasting my time with this blog? Is it worth looking at? Why don't you leave comments? 314 views, 3 comments. That's less than 1%...lift your game people
Posted by on Tue, 17 Apr 2007 23:21:00 GMT