Martin Andres

Droid214821912
I'm starting something new. And building up a defense that even the pentagon would want. I'm closing the doors to my fort and letting only the minimal few in. I've given up on yesterday's misfortunes and am now continuing onto the brighter tomorrow. My name is Martin Andres Campos, I am a boy of fifteen. My mind meets a dimension of thought within it's own space and time. With loud techno music blazing through my ear drums and a heart made of glass, I am going to take the future in a new direction, one scene at a time. I make up my own law. I have my own odd style. And I have my own standards to live by. Cause I am no robot, I am a human.
I like to make a difference when I can, and be helpful when I am needed. I'm definitely someone who likes to make a ruckus, and a force to be reckoned with. I'm no longer the scared little boy hiding under the covers, I've grown slightly and learned to arm myself. I am who I am and I play with who I want. Another's person's opinions won't stop me from being the only boy who is holding another boys hand. I'm the type of guy who will gladly lay on the table and let you cut me open, cause what's life without being picked apart piece by piece, organ by organ.
I would love to meet someone who could have a constructive conversation with me and isn't afraid to speak what's on there mind. Someone who is open minded and would talk to me about anything that comes out of my mouth.
I can sometimes be hopeless romantic, if your the right guy. I like to cuddle and just get to know someone. I want to be in a relationship were the boundaries are tore down and there is nothing hidden between us. Cause Isn't that what true love is made of? Isn't it when you are completely unafraid to speak what your feeling? When you know that no matter what you can say whats on your mind and feel free to express it in anyway you feel fit? I think that's what it is, but I guess everyone can describe it differently to them selfs. But I'm still young and "true love" isn't something that really has my focus.
"im a slut because i'll wear shorts and a tanktop im anorexic because i eat as much as i want and dont gain weight im a bitch because i dont let you push me around im a liar because i wont tell you everything im stupid because sometimes im wrong im ugly because my face isnt perfect im a whore because i like boys im annoying because im not chill enough im a loser because im not friends with your group i use people because i do whats best for me im fake because most of the time im happy im weird because im not like you im controlling because i get mad sometimes im clingy because i like to be around people im greedy because i like to be satisfied im neive because im younger than you im conceited because im proud of who i am im rude because my manners arent perfect im unnapreciative because i dont praise you Dont try to tell me who i am because i already know"-Unkown
You should know by now that what other people think of you doesn't matter, and that the people you around should accept you for who you are because if not then they shouldn't be the people standing next to you. Life is built up for anything and almost everything to happen, and you need to grab life and make it your bitch. Squeeze it until there is nothing left but the drips of its juices. Act as if your a painter. Your are born, that is the starting of the painting, and throughout your life you make different mistakes, which are the different colors that form your final work of art. At the end your painting can either end up being a vibrant piece of art or a blank canvas that express nothing more then a scared soul. You need to take your differences and throw them out to the world, make a ruckus, make the crowd stare. You were built with them to be something new, not the blended colors of society.
Truly my life is like a domino effect about to hit light speed with absolutely no intent of slowing down to give me the time to think or even a moment to breathe. It's so terrible that my life is more stress filled and drama taken then most teenagers that live life in the limelight. On top of my own personal worries I have to deal with what she feels and what he wants, or what my mother feels I am doing wrong and what my stepfather feels is right. It seems as if I am never going to balance out my life in and Zen Ying-Yang style. And it's more along the lines that I won't even accept that probably I draw the chaos on myself by doing the things I do. And I thrive for attention without even knowing it. I am expected to once again act a faggot over the top daily, because that's who everyone at my school knows me as. My fault entirely, I let them see me first as that because I was afraid of what I would become if I wasn't known. I guess I let the fight for popularity control my mind into bending and twisting myself into something that doesn't even come close to who I really am. I'm not really if quite clear on who I am myself. I have this foggy mist covering my thoughts and so many fears of what others think of me. I am strong and I really don't care what people think, but what scares me the most is what may happen. I mean just today someone yelled out in the halls "Jeffree Star" and they were referring to me. I truly have turned myself plastic to the public, and solid to my closed gate. But isn't that what your suppose to do? I'm so confused on whats wrong and whats right in life that it's tearing me apart limb by limb. I really just wish someone could cut me open and show me what I'm suppose to do and be. Cause I really feel that by being opened up to the society you live in you gain so much more knowledge. Who I am is so much a blank in my mind. I mean am I a boy, am I a girl, am I a "Jeffree Star". I don't know. And I am very sad to admit I am scared of what the outcome will be.