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Formed over 75 million years ago in the far reaches of Xenu’s Galactic Confederacy, Super Colossal Motion Pictures is a super group of colossal proportions. Seeking to maintain the group’s firm grasp on the Tween-pop market, manager and creator Elron Pearlman instituted an unflinchingly rigid policy requiring all members to exit the group at the onset of sexual maturation. As such, Super Colossal Motion Pictures has seen a revolving door cast of characters since sometime around the bands arrival to Earth on board a ship of the Fifth Invader Force, in the year 6235 BCE. Now in its 100,648th incarnation, Super Colossal Motion Pictures features members of LAX Archivist, The Sugar Skulls, and 12 oz. Prophets.
Buck Digsby- A Native of Hong Kong, Connecticut, Digsby narrowly escaped the danger on his hometown streets to meet his destiny in Super Colossal Motion Pictures. Armed with an arsenal of luscious sonic back drops, undeniable sexy-time allure, and an unquenchable thirst for blood, he has quickly established himself as the greatest six-stringer to ever enter the halls of the Super C.
Benny Rodriguez- The loose cannon of the band, three time 100 meter Olympic Gold Medalist Benny “The Jet†Rodriguez is easily the hairiest member of Super Colossal Motion Pictures, a fact that has spawned much speculation as to his actual age and group-member-eligibility status. Of this enigmatic bad boy, scholars do not know much- though popular legend maintains that The Jet was spewed from the bowels of Hell (through a schism in a Nebraska Cornfield) some 46 years ago. Of one thing we can be certain, The Jet will seduce your eyes and ears and slam his way into your memory banks with his melodically quirky, yet menacingly powerful bass playing.
Knuckles Knorton- A deliciously tasteful drummer of a musician, Knorton is a fierce contender for the title of Hairiest Member. Knorton honed his drum skills in a past life while serving as Robo-Warden of a prison camp on the barren tundra of Trogdor 523, located on the tip of the Krembol Nebula. Knuckles Knorton brings to the band nearly 3 millennia of robot music experience, which is easily demonstrated by his smooth-as-tits beat keeping and relentless prowess on the dance floor.
Johnny Statutory- Johnny was born to an intergalactic-nomad-conquistador couple while they were vacationing in Minnesota. While his parents bathed themselves in the waters of Lake Minnetonka, Johnny was kidnapped by the Globo-Chem Corporation in an attempt to raise and perfect an ultimate soldier. His scalp infused with a row of razor-sharp quills, the infant was armed with a guitar and a dream and sent to infiltrate the music industry in the name of Corporate Globalization. Following the unexpected demise of Globo-Chem after a lengthy investigation by a Senate ethics committee, Johnny found himself a free agent, with no home and no monetary support of any kind. He admits he originally auditioned for the band for drug money, but quickly discovered he had become part of something larger than himself, an organization he could not deny… Super Colossal Motion Pictures.
DEMOS COMING SOON!
We edited our balls with a whales vagina
