♥ Mookz ™ iz {BTU}Bitches profile picture

♥ Mookz ™ iz {BTU}Bitches

I am here for Dating

About Me

Life isn't simple, it's full of ups and downs and surprises that often catch you off guard. I've been through it all, so you won't surprise me with anything you want to bring up to the plate. I can be a complicated person, but give me time and you'll see the real me. I can be a grouch when I'm a) SLEEPY b) HUNGRY c) BROKE, so if you aren't patient please stay away. I dont sugarcoat things, I'm the realest person you'll ever meet. I'll tell you like it is no matter what, if you can't deal with it then that's your problem. If you see me in the street, I most likely won't say hi, but I'll greet you with a smile if you flash one on me. Some people say I'm a good friend, I tend to believe it. My family and friends are the most important thing in my life. I have a beautiful puppy, who I treat as my own daughter. (So, yes, she's spoiled, I give her anything she wants). I'm a Cancer, so I'm very sensitive; however, I dont give a shit what people think of me, because in my opinion no one is better than me. Yes, I'm FAT, BIG, HUGE whatever you want to call it, but guess what FUCK YOU, I'm happy. If a guy doesn't like me for me, then guess what, it's his loss. I'm confident in myself and in my skill, so your approval/opinions aren't needed, but if you feel like you have to waste your time then go ahead. Despite being fat, I don't think a skinny girl can outbeat me. I'm smart and I think atleast pretty, so I really can't complain. And for those who think fat girls can't FUCK, then let me explain to everyone being good at sex is a skill you are either born with or born without and yup yup, I'm blessed. (Don't think I'm a ho or in anyway easy, but we live in perverted times, my friends, and its just something that has to be said). I love playing games and just be warned I always win arguments. When I'm right, I'm right and when I'm wrong, I'm still right... LOL. I'm a fun person to hang out with and I tend to be really funny, I've heard. I don't know why but fat people usually are funny. I've recently realized that I haven't really done enough crazy things in my life, so in this new year I promise myself to cut loose and do me. Plain and simple, I just love life and even when life can be a bitch I suck it up and continue.

My Interests

100 things about myself: compliments of mookz. 1. i have never broken any bone in my body. 2. i have never had more than 3 zits on my face at once. 3. i am largely built, and have always wished i were smaller. 4. i am a Christian, and i love the Lord. 5. i barely ever capitalize my i's. 6. when i was in 4th grade i was obsessed with spiders. i had a collection. they had babies. they went everywhere in our classroom. it was awesome. 7. even though i am not british, i always spell colour, favour and theatre like that. even though my teachers count off for it in papers. 8. i love hermit crabs 9. i always wear either socks or shoes. 10. i hate when my feet are dirty, and i have to clean them before i go to bed. 11. i get on myspace and facebook way too much. 12. i love photography. 13. i hate little kids, not babies but the stage when they talk back. 14. i don't babysit 15. i always correct people's grammar and or spelling. 16. i love learning new words 17. i chew orbit citrus gum way too much 18. i'm ALWAYS chewing on something 19. i don't like chocolate ice cream or plain chocolate cake. 20. i think so much out of the box it's crazy. 21. last year i wanted to be an astronaut and daydreamed about going to the moon every free second i had. 22. i can pop almost everything in my body. 23. i have really bad back problems. 24. i am actually a pretty good driver 25. i am what you call crazy… 26. yes i saw the notebook and no i did not cry, yet i cried in transformers. 27. i am completely in love with Eat Pray Love 28. i am terrible at algebra, yet good at geometry 29. i LOVE popping zits. especially really big blackheads. 30. i am can’t wait for marriage. . 31. i have contacts, but i only wear them when i wanna 32. i have a fetish for hoodies and converse 33. i can't settle on a hair colour 34. i sit on my roof sometimes and stare at the sky. 35. daydreaming is what keeps me sane. 36. i find farts and burps extremely funny. Hey I grew up with two nasty little brothers 37. i have terrible table manners. TERRIBLE. 38. my hair has always been short, everytime it grows long I end up cutting it. 39. when i was a toddler i was terribly scared of cotton balls. (my parents would taunt me with them) 40. lalalala 41. i dream in bright, vivid colours and remember every detail in my dreams. 42. i love the dead language of latin 43. i have a secret obsession with canadians. 44. I am terrified of public speaking 45. i am probably one of the most creative person you could find. 46. i have 2 birds and their names are Sampson and Delilah 47. that's enough about that 48. when it's raining i am happy 49. sometimes i am grouped at school in the 'emo' group. 50. my nails are always painted. 51. last year at the beach i was swimming in the ocean (south carolina) and a pack of dolphins surfaced 10 yards in front of me and jumped in the air. it was amazing. i think i cried. 52. when i listen to music, i go into a trance that is only broken when the cd stops. 53. i like to sleep more than 8 hours a night 54. i intend to become an psychology major 55. i beat guitar hero 1 and 2 on expert. 56. i met one of my good friends on myspace. i still haven't met her in real life. her name is nicole. she lives in ohio. i have known her for 3 years. 57. my facebook and myspace is practically my life. 58. i like to be alone. i don't like socializing with adults and would rather be alone than hang with friends. (usually) 59. i hate change 60. i am in love with a complete stranger lol...he's a guy, no worries 61. hyper is an understatement for me when i get going 62. my friends say i have the best laugh ever 63. i eat granny smith apple almost everyday for snack. 64. i have never been kissed 65. never had a boyfriend, or a guy tell me he likes me. 66. he doesnt love me back 67. i say i love you, and i mean it. 68. icelandic is the most beautiful language 69. one hundred facts about myself is kinda hard to do 70. i still check under my bed before i go to bed. 71. a gay best friend are the best friends to have… 72. i haven't been ok in years…. 73. i can fall asleep with my eyes open…I think lol 74. sometimes i sleep with my leg over the side of the bed 75. i'm a sucker for a guy with baby face features 76. i love art and could not live without it. 77. if you see it green, i see it purple. i view the world with different eyes. 78. i love translating 79. i hate killing things 80. i listen to music all the time. 81. in class, you might find me with headphones going up my shirt with one earphone in listening to the music instead of the professor 82. i can't stand fake people. if you're going to be fake with me, i will give you the cold shoulder. 83. i LOVE drawings of raindrops and umbrellas and lightning. 84. i own a bunch of paramore shirts. 85. i am getting sleepy 86. i sleep in sweatshirts in the winter. 87. i miss old cartoons. 88. i wish i lived in italy 89. i love street art and handmade clothes. 90. i am only twenty three going on twenty four in june 91. i hate pictures of flowers. 92. the best time of my life so far was when I went to south Carolina with Dickie and other friends it was Awesome 93. i am always cold. 94. i wish i had a vampire that looked over me like edward does in twilight... 95. i am always thirsty. 96. i am quite lazy. 97. i never stop thinking. 98. i think i am in love with…(wait why am I gonna spill that fact). 99. actually, i KNOW i am in love with…..you guess 100. my favourite word is andvari, and i have no idea what it means.

I'd like to meet:

Confessions of a fat girl: I used to think beer goggles made me look good. Maybe men were just embarrased to be attracted to me and alcohol gave them an excuse. Society doesn't approve. Regardless, they were or so I thought. I was told this weekend I just seem like the kind of girl who likes to have fun. I think you get what he meant. My theory was wrong.No one has ever said they love me - minus family and friends. I've never had a real relationship in my life. I'm gonna be turning 24. I spent two years in a "relationship" with a man who never called me anything more than a bitch. We spent Christmas with my family though, acted like the perfect couple, though never in public. I'm naive, I'm lonely, I'm desperate for attention. I'm jealous of my best friend. She's beautiful, funny, smart and talented. When she walks in a room, I disappear. I've been physically knocked over to get to her. I don't resent her at all, I resent me...and the men who can't see me. Somedays it's hard to go out with her. They all fall in love. I can't blame them. She wouldn't be my best friend if she wasn't so great.I'm funny in a crowd or a group of people. Really funny. I can keep them laughing for hours. I never laugh alone. I'm not that funny. Fat girls are just supposed to be funny. I'm one of the guys, I tell my girlfriends what guys really meant. I'm usually on the guys side in a fight though not always. I like sports, I can fix things around the house, I'm used to being independent. I talk too loud. Give me an hour and a few drinks and I'll make an ass of myself. My breast arent perfect, I have ripples and dimples where I shouldn't. I'm creeped out by most men who like only big women. I don't want to be anyone's fetish. Don't tell me I look good in a thong. I know I don't! Men have told me I'm cute. Only one has said beautiful. Women aren't like men. Well, some. Some women judge me, some snicker, some whisper. Some tell me I'm beautiful. In my head, I don't look like me. Most women look in a mirror and see themselves different than they really are. Most see themselves worse than they are. I see better. I'm always somehow shocked and horrified when I see pictures. I didn't think I looked like that! I remember looking good that night. I wonder if people are embarassed of me...to introduce me. I wonder if a man would ever walk down the street holding my hand. I wonder what people would say. I wonder what they would whisper. I wonder why women always try to fix me up with fat men. Like we are a breed that needs to stick together. I'd like to live one day in a different body. I'd love to take the self portraits I picture in my mind, without the limitations of hiding a double chin, or a roll, or a dimple. Maybe today is the day. Then again, maybe it'll take baby steps….

Books:

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Heroes:


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My Blog

I’m determined

I’ve been determined to do a nude self-portrait. Not anything pornographic, but something. Why? Because I’m not a perfect size 0. I’m not a skinny girl. I have a big ass and cellulit...
Posted by ♥ Mookz ™ iz {BTU}Bitches on Mon, 07 Apr 2008 10:03:00 PST

Something Happened.....

Something happened........that has never happened to me before. A lot is going on in my life right now. I am full of emotions......and so maybe this is just the part of my healing process.I was talkin...
Posted by ♥ Mookz ™ iz {BTU}Bitches on Thu, 27 Mar 2008 07:21:00 PST

Waiting to Love.

Most people are waiting to love...Most of us are waiting to give our deepest gifts to each other and the world.Why?To love without waiting is to jump open as life -- without knowing what's going to ha...
Posted by ♥ Mookz ™ iz {BTU}Bitches on Mon, 11 Feb 2008 09:54:00 PST

Distance is a State of Mind

 It can be a tunnel or a sweeping vista, it's simply a point of view.I close my eyes and my internal dialogue kicks in. It sounds like the ramblings of a madman. Flitting from sullen murmurs to s...
Posted by ♥ Mookz ™ iz {BTU}Bitches on Mon, 11 Feb 2008 09:45:00 PST

Revelations.

In every minute there are nearly 60 blink . So if I could never close my eyes I would have a lot of seconds more to see the beauty . I had always heard your entire life flashes in front of your eyes t...
Posted by ♥ Mookz ™ iz {BTU}Bitches on Wed, 23 Jan 2008 09:12:00 PST

Please...Tell Me How To Stop...Please

u ruinedthe songs that i used to likecoz now everything and its meaningall remind me that ur notwhat they made me feel u wereu ruinedthe spirit i once had insideby breaking every thought of puritykind...
Posted by ♥ Mookz ™ iz {BTU}Bitches on Tue, 18 Dec 2007 06:01:00 PST

I Just Couldnt Go On.

Take meMake meGive meI dream behind closed eyes.Imagining your face.Your touchYour feel.You inspire me to write like birds fly.See youBe youLove you.Tasting the sweetness of your lips.My body gets chi...
Posted by ♥ Mookz ™ iz {BTU}Bitches on Tue, 18 Dec 2007 05:57:00 PST

Day by Day

As I try to breathe, I laugh a little. It's harder and harder to breathe these days. And it's harder to force myself to eat. It's harder to wake up, except when I have the possibility of a smoke, or a...
Posted by ♥ Mookz ™ iz {BTU}Bitches on Tue, 11 Dec 2007 05:55:00 PST

Just Venting

Well I guess that I have learned a few things in the past few months and that is that I cannot and probably will not trust anything for some time to come. It seems to be that every time I begin to ope...
Posted by ♥ Mookz ™ iz {BTU}Bitches on Fri, 05 Oct 2007 09:53:00 PST

ALIVE

I had an essay for English..The topic: What Matters.Closing my eyes, I racked my brain for an answer. Friends ... family ... love. No, all those were too obvious. I took a deep breath and thought some...
Posted by ♥ Mookz ™ iz {BTU}Bitches on Thu, 13 Sep 2007 11:31:00 PST