ian

sometimes people ask me, "ian, what is it about you that makes you so fucking sweet all the time?" and i'm like, "well timmy, have you ever wondered what the combined dream of a thousand dreaming kittens would look like? that's right, just like my incredibly good looking face timmy, exactly like it." but that's not the only thing that makes me so unbelievably awesome all of the time every second of every day. you see that magical dancing light behind my pool like beautiful blue eyes? that's the light kisses, and hugs and unicorn wishes makes. do you have that light behind your eyes timmy? no you don't, i didn't think you did but i just wanted to establish decisively that i have that light and you don't. are we clear? good. i'm like a melting creamsicle being eaten by a doe eyed bunny in a woodland clearing bespeckled by the afternoon sunshine, and the bunny is wearing a hand sewn bonnet with little ribbons and what not sewn willy nilly all over it. i smell like roses and new love. my soft voice is like a million chipmunk whispers carried along the trade winds of the gulf to caress the ear lobe of a sun bathing greek goddess on the coast of the sea. i'm like 12 pounds of sweetness in a 3 pound bag. sometimes i wish i was a little less freaking sweet, it's like a burden. it weighs me down, and at times it almost crushes me. but then i sit up and i say to myself, i say to myself, "ian", i say, "if you can't carry this load who will?" so i pull myself up and i friggin do it. i fucking carry that fucking huge load of fucking awesomeness and i fucking carry it all day long. Home | Browse | Search | Invite | Film | Mail | Blog | Favorites | Forum | Groups | Events | Videos | Music | Comedy | Classifieds