I have a first AND last name!

About Me

I have usually had nothing but sarcastic rambling on this page and I don't really see any good reason to stop now. I never update this thing and I really never even visit myspace anymore but I figured that I would toss out at least a little something new. Even if there really isn't anything new to speak of.Ahem...so where do I start? Let's see. I'm still happy in love. I'm still happy with my cats. I'm still playing video games. I'm still about 150 pounds. I still have ten fingers and ten toes. I'm still smoking more than I should. It's been a little while since I've been drunk. I haven't been dancing in forever, but depending on who you ask that might be a great thing. I hate my job. I used to love it, but now I hate it. Well, hate is a strong word....Ok, yeah I hate it.There once was a time when you would be reading this page and at this point my irresistable charm would take over and I would list off all the wonderful things about myself. Well, that list has gotten shorter. Much, much shorter. Let me sum up all the good things about me as quickly as possible. Here goes.Carlie. My incredibly huge penis.Put those two together and that's all she wrote!

My Interests

My interests are few and far between.

I'd like to meet:

I think it be alright to hang out with that one guy. What's his name? Oh that's right...Jesus!

Music:

Music moves a whole lot of people. It touches them and by GOD they will swear by how important it is and how much it means to them. I'm not one of those people. Music's alright, but I could really care less about it. On one station I got strippers coming out of my ears. On the next someone's crying about how they are sad and misunderstood so they want to cut themselves and then on the rest of the stations they don't even speak English. And don't give me that shit about "Oh, well you have to go out and find good music. Don't listen to the radio." Yeah, no thanks. I'm not interested in finding much of anything. Give me everything before.....i'm really not sure.

Movies:

I'm sure there are some decent movies out there somewhere and we might even be able to talk about one or two of them, but I doubt it. In fact, if you want to talk about movies with me then maybe you should get a fish tank or something.

Television:

I like the Discovery Channel. And REBA!!! Wholly fuckin' shit man! I love that show! Listen to my profile song!

Books:

I don't know how to read.

Heroes:

My heroes have always been cowboys. And that's probably one of the reasons why I've never really made it anywhere in life.

My Blog

It will be done...

Well, that's it. I've had enough of it. I'm coming back home come Hell or high water. The thing is, I'm finally ready. I'm tired, I'm worn and I'm entirely too frustrated with ...
Posted by I have a first AND last name! on Thu, 31 Jul 2008 08:30:00 PST

Works 1 out of 100 times. Guaranteed!!!

I found myself sitting in a chair the other day. It was broken and I didn't know. Well, I found out. Yep. The easy way. Someone told me. That was really nice of the...
Posted by I have a first AND last name! on Mon, 07 May 2007 09:19:00 PST

Here we go...

There was something here just a minute or two ago. Something nice. Something soothing. Something insightful. It was just here, and now I've lost it. Where did it go, I wonder.&...
Posted by I have a first AND last name! on Fri, 04 May 2007 04:34:00 PST

Mediocrity

There are millions of people for whom mediocrity is an acceptable way of life. I would like to think I'm not one of them. My greatest fear is that I'm wrong. Some of those m...
Posted by I have a first AND last name! on Wed, 28 Mar 2007 09:41:00 PST

You know what's worse than having gonorrhea?

You know what's worse than having gonorrhea? Being an idealist. Because when you're an idealist, you stay an idealistit's not curable by antibiotics and not mitigated by whatever they mitigate gonorr...
Posted by I have a first AND last name! on Wed, 28 Mar 2007 09:36:00 PST

Just because

I sometimes like to type things out because it makes me feel like somehow and in [someway] I would be getting things off my chest. That's not the case here, because quite frankly I don't really ...
Posted by I have a first AND last name! on Sun, 25 Mar 2007 01:39:00 PST

Weekends are for pansies...

And no sooner had I wished it...the Austin winds grew heavy carrying off any layer of sheeps clothing that had been drifting about. The year has been normal, but hectic....the weekends loom clos...
Posted by I have a first AND last name! on Tue, 30 Jan 2007 11:05:00 PST

It's a Pre-Pa-two-za....as it were.

Oh sweet baby Jesus! I think I might have had just a little too much to drink last night. Then again, maybe I didn't have enough. And so it was. January 20, 2007. The "P...
Posted by I have a first AND last name! on Sun, 21 Jan 2007 02:35:00 PST

Another year gone by....and what?

And so here comes the new year. And here it comes with a vengeance. I have to level with you all. I'm really not too excited about '07. I'm not sure what it is or why I feel th...
Posted by I have a first AND last name! on Thu, 04 Jan 2007 06:11:00 PST

Give Me Good News

saying nothing leaves an awful mouthful often overshadows matters audible you know some things never change and i want it still though i know i have a lot to tell you thought of holding out for older...
Posted by I have a first AND last name! on Mon, 30 Oct 2006 08:07:00 PST