~LoNeLy~

° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° °i hAvE LiVeD iN soLiTuDe fOr 17 yEaRs. pEopLe aSk mE wHy aM i sO iLLoGiCaL, tHe rEaSoN wAs nO oNe tRiEd tO uNdErStAnD mE. i wAs nEvEr iNtErEsTeD iN aNyOnE's LiFe, i jUsT diDn'T wAnT tO gEt iNvoLvEd. tHeY wiLL onLy cOmpLiCaTe mY LiFe.i hAvE fOrGoTtEn hOw tO LoVe, onLy mEmOriEs oF hAtE. tHe cLaNdEsTiNe cHRoNicLeS oF mY LiFe aRe fiLLeD wiTh sOrRoW. tHe oNeS i rEaLLy LoVeD bEtRaYeD mY tRuSt, tHuS mEtAmOrPhOsiS tOoK pLaCe, cHaNgiNg mY LoVe iNtO hAtE.sEeiNg hUmAnS diE rEmiNdEd oF mY oWn mOrTaLiTy. i LeAd a mAcAbRe LiFe, fAcInG dEaThS oFtEn. i sEnSe nO hOpE iN mY LiFe, iT's pRoBabLy gOiNg tO eNd sOoN. i wAs aN oUtCaSt, fOr mY mOrBiD pErSoNaLiTy. bUt i dOn'T miNd.. siNcE tHiS wiLL aLL eNd. i'M nOt aFrAiD oF dEaTh, bUt i aM sCaReD nO oNe wiLL hAvE mEmOriEs oF mE. aM i wOrThY eNoUgH oF bEiNg rEmEmBeReD?i aM oFtEn caLLeD a "wiFe oF jUdAs" oR "hErEtiC", dEsPiSeD bY fELLoW cHriStiAnS, jUsT bEcAuSe oF mY aTTiTuDe.i hAvE bEeN hiDiNg tHiS dEmOnS...diDn'T wAnT aNyoNe tO kNoW. bUt nOw... i dOn'T cArE aNyMoRe. wHaT cAn tHoSe pAtHeTiC iMbEciLeS dO tO mE? nO oNe cAn jUdGe mE, OnLy GoD aNd onLy mY beLoVeD oNeS hAvE tHe riGhT tO.i aM a pRiSoNeR oF dEaTh. tHe sHaCkLeS, tHe cHaiNs... onLy 'hE' cAn fReE mE. tHe tiMe oF hOpE hAs cOme. gRaNt mE fReEdOm, reLeAsE mE fRoM tHeSe meLaNcHoLy mEmOriEs.iF yOu LoVe sOmEoNe, yOu hAvE tO bE aBLe tO pRoTeCt tHeM. bUt i cOuLdN't... i hAtE mYseLf fOr bEiNg sO wEaK, sO wOrThLeSs.i wAsN't tHeRe fOr hiM wHeN hE nEeDeD mE, i aM sOrRy. mEmOriEs aRe tO bE fOrGoTtEn & tEaRs tO bE fOrGiVeNnOw iN fRoNt oF yOu,i cAn fiNaLLy diE. i'M tHrOuGh rEgEtTiNg tHe pAsT. eVeR siNcE tHy LeFt mY siDe,i wAs tRueLy aLiVe nOr dEaD. bUt sOoN...sOoN tHiS wiLL fiNaLLy aLL eNd.hOw mUcH mOrE mUsT i wiTnEsS aLL tHiS bLoOdShEd? i wiLL nOt aLLoW tHiS pAiN aNd aNxiEtY tO pAsS oN tO yEt aNoThEr gEnErAtiOn. aLL tHiS wAs tO pUt aN eNd tO cHaOs!nOw mY LyF hAs cHaNgEd To wHaT i WaNtEd iT tO bE.. mY fAmiLy hErE.. mY fRiEnDz.. mY LoVed oNeS..tHaNk yOu....m/ rOcK oN!!