Kissing Is A Habit
Fucking Is A Game
Guys Get All The Pleasure
Girls Get All The Pain
10 Minutes Of Pleasure
9 Months Of Pain
3 Days In The Hospital
A Baby Without A Name
The Father Is A Bastard The Mother Is A Whore
This Woulda Never Happend If The Rubber Hadn't Tore!!
Syny's Poetry Corner
Added:
March 16th
Forgotten and Abandoned Cinderella
Forgotten and Abandoned Cinderella
She pray's to those above, to not let him forget her..
She hopes with all her might that he still cares enough to give her that.
She knows he may not love her, but she's tired of being forgotten.
She may have told him time and time again,
"Your bound to forget about me, everyone does."
but he's the one she wished it would never come true.
He's the one she hoped to god would never abandon her..
He's the one she wanted more then anything, to just be with.
Sometimes she wishes he could have been her knight in shinning armor,
not just her fake in tin foil..
sometimes she wishes he would have slayed dragons for her,
and fought wizards and warlocks for her safty..
Sometimes she thinks he should have faught for her,
and proved to her his love..
but then she realizes...
he had no love for her..
Sometimes she wishes, he would have protected her from evil,
and ridden her off into the sunset on his trusty steed...
sometimes she wishes she wasnt asking to be Cinderella....
She never wanted to be Cinderella..
Never wanted to be alone in a dusty celler waiting on someone who would never come...
She never wanted to be like someone waiting to be rescued.
She would have rather rescued herself..
why now..............
why now did she want so bad to be Cinderella???
Was it because she knew that she herself would soon be locked away in the celler and forgotten???
That she knew she was about to be abandoned again, by the one she wished would never do it??
was it because she knew her fate?????????????????????
Added:
November 24th
How She Feels
She hear's him say the words,
She see's the look on his face,
She feel's the knife pierce her heart,
As she watches him walk away.
He walks away,
Not once did he look back,
Tear's filled her eyes,
As he got further and further away.
She wishes she knew what to say,
She raced thru her mind,
Trying to find something that might make him stay.
But she know's the truth of the situation..
And know's nothing will make him stay.
As he walks away, she just want's to fall,
Fall to her knees to the ground,
Fall and let it all out.
Fall and curl up in a ball,
Fall and rock herself, cry herself to sleep.
She feel's her knees shake,
Her legs turn to Jello,
Her tear's tempararally blinding her,
Her sobes cloging her ears,
She doesnt know if she can go on,
Without him by her side,
She doesnt want to live her life,
with the mistakes she has made.
She remember's a time when life was so much easier,
When hights and spiders had been her only fear's.
She missed how she once was,
Never fearing anything,
Having no regrets.
Living life to it's fullest,
Instead of fearing life itself.
But now, She feared every little thing.
She feared love, in fear of being hurt again.
There isnt much she doesnt fear.
She watches him, until he's out of site,
Knowing that he's just walked from her life,
Knowing that he's gone for good.
Knowing she's just lost the very thing,
That if only for a short time,
made her forget all her fears..
But now she stand's in the road,
broken and exposed
all of her fears start flooding back.
She wishes He would turn around,
go back and wrap his arms around her.
She wanted to feel safe again,
She wanted this all to be a dream,
But she knew the realitiy of the situation,
Knew that wasnt going to happen.
Added:
November 23rd
Beautiful Killa
She's known as Beautiful Killa, She's the Ninja of your dreams.
She didnt get her nickname for no reason, She's the most beautiful thing you've ever seen.
All the Ninja's wanna be her, and all the Juggalo's wanna make her there own.
She's the talk of the town, the hottest Ninja you've ever seen.
But looks are only skin deep.
Pain and scares stab at her heart, tear at her soul.
She looks happy as can be, but actions speak louder then words.
Inside, she feel's broken and Brused,
Torn and confused,
Twisted and used.
No body see's her for who she is,
They just see her beauty.
Juggalo's call her Hott, or Fine,
but what she wants to hear is that she's beautiful,
After all, her nickname IS Beautiful Killa.
She's not seen for her mind and knowlage,
Nobody even know's she's smart.
In there mind, a Ninja cant be Beautiful and Smart,
there's no such thing as a package Deal, it's either one or the other.
She acts as if nothing is wrong,
As if nothing bothers her.
She wear's her tight revealing clothes,
But all she wants to do is cover up.
She hate's who she's become,
Hate's what she's expected to be.
She wishes she could be seen as more then just some hott Ninja..
Wishes she could be known for her brain, not her look's.
She walks the hall's of her highschool, blaring ICP in her ears,
She feels the gaze of all the guys follow her as she moves.
She wishes they saw her as more then just a piece of ass.
Wishes someone would actually care..
She's popular at school, friends with all the Juggalo's and Ninja's,
Her grade's are low, she cant be an over achever, noone expects her to be smart.
She know's the answers, wishes she'd tell, but no one, not even the teachers know she's smart.
So she must keep her grades low, and live down to there low expectations.
After school, she's known as the local booty call.
All the Juggalo's see her as an easy hit.
They get her high, they get her drunk, and they get her in bed, then they're gone.
She wishes she could change the life she's expected to live.
She wishes she could tell them, she's not just some one night stand.
They treat her like a dog. Treat her like she's nothing.
In her heart, she know's she's more
But in her head, they've left there impression.
With every new day, she believes more of being nothing.
With every day, her mask gets thicker.
She's known as Beautiful Killa,
But she feel's as ugly as can be.
She feels as if she's not ment for anything.
As if she's nothing more then some Juggalo's play thing.
She pulls more and more away, locking her emotions up tight where they will never be known.
But she cant take it anymore.
She cant take being nothing to anyone.
She longs to feel wanted and loved.
She only see's one way out from here.
The one way she knew people would expect her to go.
She fishes threw her medicain cabnet, grabbing what ever her hands feel.
She turns the sink on, and opens bottle after bottle.
She reaches for a cup and holds it under the cold running water.
She empy's bottle after bottle of pills and empty's them in her hand.
She throws her head back, shoving the pills in her mouth and takes a big gulp of water.
and now, she waits.
Beautiful Killa was found on her bathroom floor,
Next to her lifeless body, lay a note writen in her hand.
It read "dont let beautiful girl's be held back because of there looks.
Dont let Beautiful girls end up like me.
Dont let Beautiful girls Hide who they are.
Dont let beautiful girls let people tell them they cant be smart.
Fore if you do, there bowned to end up like me."
When news spread of Beautiful Killa's suicide, Juggalo's knew who's fault it had been.
They knew in there hearts she was more then what they thought her to be.
She deserved more respect then they had given her.
But there words had done there damage, and there was no going back
No changing what they had done.
Beautiful Killa left an impression on the Ninja's in that town.
Through her death, she tought them not to hide.
Showed them what was bowened to happen if they let Juggalo's tell them what they were.
With her death, She showed people who she was.
Showed people she had a brain and had emotions and felt the pain everyone thought she couldnt.
Beautiful Killa was more then just a pretty face,
Beautiful Killa was more then just a sexy body,
Beautiful Killa was human.
She felt all the same pain everyone does.
It just took people to long to notice that
By the time they had, it was to late.
Beautiful Killa let them deside who she was.
Beautiful Killa let them take her life....
She Still Love's Him, But He Doesnt Love Her...
She Still Loves Him.. But He Doesnt Love Her.... And she cant get him out of her mind.... She doesnt know what to do, or who to trust anymore... She love's him, but He doesnt love her......
She alway's hear's his voice in her head, saying things she'd only wished he would have said.. She see's his face every time she closes her eye's... She's kept up at night, wondering what could have been.... Her mind is flooded with memories of the way thing's once were... She hear's him beg, plead with her to go back to the way they were, but he doesnt understand she cant... She cant just stop loving him.. Cant go back to being just friends..... She sees how much her pushing him away hurts him, but she cant stop it... no matter how hard she tries, she cant bring herself to.. She Love's him.. but he doesnt love her....
She remember's how happy she would get when her phone rang, and his name came across the screen... She remember's how her mood would change from upset to estatic every time she talked to him..... She remember's how the sound of his laugh would alway's bring a smile to her face...... She misses those day's, but now that he know's, she cant go back... She love's him.. but he doesnt love her...
She love's talking to him, but it ripps her heart out every time she does.... She love's the sound of his voice, but it kill's her every time she hear's it.... She love's seeing him, but she feel's like killing herself every time she does..... She hear's him when he says what she does is hurting him, but he doesnt understand how much it killes her just the same...... She agrees with him when he say's her not talking to him tear's his heart out..... She know's exactly how he feel's.. Know's exactly what he's saying... Every time he says he loved her, her heart stop's beating... She cant breath... She sit's completly still staring at the computer screen.... Unable to move.. She still love's him... but he gave up on her............................
I'd like to meet:
Damn fuckin right!
Let me get your ear
I'm gonna make myself clear
Its the L family
Juggalos right here
You can take away my mike
You can take away this life
But the love that we got
It ain't never gonna stop
Were eternal
Past the servant bullshit
Dogs on another level
Can you feel this
It's twisted Blaze and ICP
And if your fucking with my dogs
Boy you D I E.
Music:
SOME OF THE BEST FRIENDS A GIRL COULD ASK FOR Mike
He's my most recent ex, and one I will Alway's love... No matter what, nothing will change that.. But he doesnt want me in his life anymore... or atleast thats how he makes me feel.. But oh well.. I fucked things up between us so its my fault. I dont deserve to stay in his life... I dont deserve his friendship.. But he deserves the best he could ever possibly get.. Which Deff not me... But I hope he get's what he's looking for. And I hope he know's that I'll never stop loving him, and never stop thinking about him.. I will alway's love you, Mike... Always...
Kelsey
Kelsey's one of my best friends. She has been for a few years now. She's always been there for me and always willing to help me out no matter what.. She's also CONSTANTLY trying to hook me up!!! lmao! But it's all good. I love her anyway! I think of her like a sister to me. I've known her since sixth grade. Back then we wernt the best of friends, we just delt with each other because we shared our friend, Stacey. But now we're like sister, I think anyway.. I was heart broken when I found out she moved to mass :'(.. but yeah, I LOVE YOU, KELSEY!!!!!!!!!
April
She's an all around nice person. She's the one i can talk to about anything and not have to worry about her judging me. We can sit down and talk for hours of meaningless things to most people, but the most important things to us. She's a great friend Kyle
Kyle's been like a brother to me for as long as I can remember. He's taken on the Brother name and has tried to protect me from all that he can. He's the protective type who wants to alway's make sure his baby sister is safe. lol, He's a great guy with a caring heart. Him and his wife had there first son, Drake, on March 5th.. Which also happends to be my mom's birthday.. lol, But Drake is an adorable little bugga..
Darren
Darren's my smexy English man!! haha, He's from England but recently moved to south Cali.. I lost contact with him for a while but one day he randomly IMed me and was like 'HEY! I KNO YOU!' lol, I was like 'um.. and who are you???' lol, but I remember him now and Im glad he got back into contact with me.. I missed my Smexy Englishman!!!!! lmao!!
Gary
Gary's a good friend of mine.. haha, He may be wearing a Yankee's hat, but he's not a Yankee's fan. or at least if he is, he's lying to me, and I'll kick his ass, haha. Supposably it was a bet and he lost, haha, sucks for him. This pic is kinda old, a few years, but I like it. It's a good pic of him.. along with the only pic I've ever seen of him.. haha. But he's a good friend of mine. He's been there for me when I've needed someone to talk to, and I've tried to do the same with him.. :P Love you, Gary!
Spencer
Spencer's one of my Ex's whom I still have major ass feelings for.. And he know's that.. I still love him, and he kno's that. I was stupid to have left him, but I had good reason's too which Im not about to say on here. But he was an amazing boyfriend, he is an amazing friend, and an amazing person. who deserves nothing less then the best... LOVE YOU, SPENCE!!!!!!!
Mike
he's a great friend. He's there when I need to talk to someone, he'd lend a shoulder to cry on if he could. He's caring and loving when he wants to be. He may act like an ass at times, but he's got a heart of gold. He may laugh when I get hurt, but inside he wonders if I'm okay. He's the kind of guy I know, but sometimes wish I didnt. The kind of guy I can fight with, but still know he's there for me if I need him. He's the one I could call at 12 am just to talk. He's the one I could call at 3am cuz I had a bad dream, and know he'll repeat the phase "it was only a dream" while laughing soft enough so I cant hear his giggles. He's the one that lives 7 hours away and still know he's just a click of a mouse or a phonecall away. He's the kind of guy I love, even if he doesnt love me..
Kyle
He's a great guy all around. He's been there for me thru thick and thin. once again, I love him, even if he doesnt love me. He's the kind of guy that will think of me as a little sister at times, but still be able to see me as a friend.. The kind of guy that will do what ever it takes to keep me safe.. I love you, Kyle!!!!!!!!
Josh
He's my Big Brother.. If you wanna know hero, he's one.. litterally.. He was in Iraq.. He protects me from what others can not. He looks out for me when he can... He's the best brother a girl could ask for.. LOVE YOU, JOSH!!!
And Im sorry for everything I did to you... Im sorry about all the problem's I've caused.. Sorry we even met.. Nothing would have ever happend, if we had never met.... And everything wouldnt be all my fault..... But Im used to it... Everything's ALWAYS all my fault... Goodbye, Josh... you were a great friend, and an amazing brother.... I'll alway's love you.. just wont be here to show you..
Tim
I asked Tim before I put this up about him, But Tim is a great friend. He's been a good close friend of mine for a while now, and it takes a lot for me to say I trust someone and mean it, but I mean it to the full extent with Tim. He's a great guy. The picture of Tim on here, is him showin his Juggalo side after a party.. I begged him to send me the pics.. lol. His paint doesnt scare me like Mike's does.. lol.. but yeah. Tim deserves a girl that will treat him right..
Corie
He's the best guy ever. He's my Cor-Cor. He's my cousin, and he's the best cousin ever! He is a former Marine that was in Iraq 3 times, and was offered the Purple Heart Twice.. He turned them both down. He IS my hero.. And he know's that! LOVE YOU, COR-COR!!!
Anthony
Anthony is an amazing guy. He know's more about me, then most people here. He's a great guy, but sometimes does stupid things... But mostly with good intentions. He's a great friend, and he's alway's been there for me.. He's a great guy, who deserves great things..
Michael
He's been my best friend for years.. Ever since he moved here our 7th grade year. And he's been a crush for about just as long. But I've come to turms with the fact that we're never going to get together. He deserves the best. Deserves a girl that will treat him right, cuz he will treat her right. He's the sweetest guy I know, and needs to find a sweet girl. He's the best friend a girl, or anyone, could ever ask for.
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Heroes:
MY HERO, BRADLEY GRANT THOMAS ANDRESS
IN LOVING MEMORY OF TABITHA
