DisembAudio is the word famous synthesized voice behind RiffTrax's Patented "Perfect Synch Technology." He has long been a player in the world of synthesized voices, and has worked in all areas of the industry.
Originally thrust into the world of RiffTrax due to fluke circumstances, (mainly due to the fact that DisembAudio's voice was the absolute, rock bottom, cheapest one available), he has since become a beloved institution of the RiffTrax universe. He boasts an army of followers, "DisembAudio's Squadio," which has been compared to the "Claymates" of former American Idol Clay Aiken, in both their numbers and their tendency to be comprised of mostly middle aged house wives and gay men.
DisembAudio entered the world of Voice Synthesis against the wishes of his parents. His father was one of those toy monkeys that bangs cymbals together and his mother was a dumpy level, an instrument used for surveying.
They had hoped that DisembAudio would choose a more respectable career, such as the button you press before you cross the street, but for a young child with posters of the voice of KITT and Dr. Sbaitso on his wall, such a boring career would not do. DisembAudio left home in the middle of the night and hitchhiked to Hollywood, serving as a CB Radio companion to lonely truckers in order to pay his way. To this day he becomes misty eyed whenever he hears the theme from "Convoy" playing on a bar jukebox (he is currently soliciting suggestions for better bars to hang out in.)
Upon arrival in Hollywood, DisembAudio set to work synthesizing his voice for anyone who was willing to listen. He worked as the movie announcer for MuveeFön, a direct competitor to MovieFone which was unfortunately impossible for consumers to remember how to spell and went bankrupt in a week and a half. He announced understudies for a sixth grade production of "The Pied Piper of Hamlin", but he was only paid in lukewarm punch. He attempted to work as the announcer for the LA Subway system, but his voice was too easy to understand, and he was quickly fired. In a final act of desperation, he attempted to rob a bank. This debacle led to his arrest and the brief popularity of the catch phrase "You can't rob a bank with no hands."
Having hit rock bottom, DisembAudio vowed to never end up in prison again. He changed his work ethic, briefly sobered up and most importantly, lowered his asking price to well under half the rate of his nearest competitor. Soon the work was rolling in. Appearances on pop albums led DisembAudio to be the first artist since the Beatles to appear on seven of the top ten hits at one time. He landed a job as Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger's personal vocal navigation system in his Hummer. And of course, he met up with Mike Nelson at the RiffTrax studio.
DisembAudio is excited to be part of the RiffTrax team, and hopes that future movies feature more robots. He also would like to synch lines for foreign language films and musicals, in order to show off his synthesized vocal talents. He would like to work with a Speak 'n Spell as a guest syncher.
A response to the haters drawn by one of the devoted members of DisembAudio's Squadio
To hear me at work, please visit www.rifftrax.com