About me huh . . .Part OneYoung Jacob Bagdasarian Bentley was born on a Frosty July morning, in the year of our Lord, 1985. His parents loved him with a fervor and intensity reserved for Olympic Athletes and small rabid animals . . . until the age of three when they got bored of him and his cuteness started to wear off a bit, they got a puppy. They loved that puppy . . . but then realized you have to walk and feed that puppy daily, they turned their attention back to young Jake, 5 years old now, who could crap on his own, feed himself, and had already found himself a steady job as personal assistant to Sesame Street personality Elmo.Elmo was a cold hearted bastard but he taught Jake some important life lessons he'll never forget, like watchout everyone's trying to stab you in the back and just because you pee sitting down dosen't make you a girl. They had a Father-Son relationship until Elmo stabbed Jake in the back . . . literally. You see Elmo was having an affair with Bert, which Jake found out about and Elmo attempted to kill him to keep Jake from telling Ernie and various tabloid magazines . . . Long story short Elmo was aquitted and Jake moved on to a singing careerPart 2 . . . Coming Soon!
Myspace Layouts - Image Hosting - Comments
