PAT FACTSPatrick Bigland has infra-red vision.
Patrick Bigland has diplomatic immunity for all his sexual actions.
Patrick Bigland has a 720 degree feild of vision.
Patrick Bigland rained down a marranding killing spree on the french in a blimp because he hates france.
Patrick Bigland refuses to acknowledge the clour pink, instead he calls it "very light red".
Patrick Bigland is embroiled in a never ending war with the indigeonous people of wales.
Patrick Bigland sweets a 50/50 mixture of testosterone and sarin gas.
Patrick Bigland is unable to remember or pronounce the word "fear".
The sovereign state of Bigland exists exactly 3 meters, outward in all directions from Patrick Biglands center of mass. There is only one rule in this state; No pacifism.
Patrick Bigland operates at 110% efficency.
Patrick Bigland is the only Biological organism that knows the interuterine device functions
Patrick Bigland Invented spain
Patrick Bigland is invulnerable to kryptonite
Whilst fighting with the mujahadeen in Afghanistan, Patrick Bigland single handedly defeated the soviet troops in one continuous week long battle, that resulted in the russians retreating from Afghanistan.
Patrick Bigland can assimilate himself into any piece of technology for combat purposes
Patrick Bigland invented gravity
Patrick Bigland can see through certian metal alloys. including thoes used to build tanks
In 1999 the "bigland accord" stated that Patrick Bigland will never engage in warfare with earth, but will retaliate if provoked into conflict.
Patrick Bigland invented all form of self-defence, including Karate and smo wrestling.
Patrick Bigland is actually a cyborg sent back in time from the year 3010. His purpose is unknown but many belive that the fate of the solor system rests on his sholders.
Patrick Bigland is a time lord
Patrick Bigland has mastered the ability of levitation for combat purposes.
Patrick Bigland uses the terms pyjamas, or jammies but refuses to call them PJ's as it is affitiated with americn culture which is an offence to the queen.
