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Who am I, you ask? Let's try to elaborate further. I am me. Myself. I. Someone to be...experienced. Not described, though I'll give it a shot anyway. I'm a tall girl, full of shortcomings. I fear failure more than I fear death. I sleep too few hours in the night, and I act irresponsibly when I have one drink too many. I'm a laugh a minute, but a shoulder to cry on. I'm stronger than I'll ever let myself believe, and I have been through more than anyone would ever imagine. I am a student, a teacher, a felon, a judge, a dreamer, a realist, a pessimist, an optimist, and a bundle of contradictions. I value honesty more than anything else in this world. I love listening to gossip, but don't care to share. I'm quick to argue, but I'll back down when I'm wrong. I have a loud mouth, and a quick wit. I enjoy the sound of silence while experiencing a good book. I don't like to eat breakfast. I don't listen to advice unless I've requested it. I love tattoos and piercings. I dance like a buffoon just to get my kicks. I live in hooded sweatshirts. I write poetry that nobody wants to read. I'm a published photographer, a published writer, and a pre-med student questioning her path. I might end up taking another road and becoming a psychologist, a zoologist, a veternarian, or a Latin teacher. Who knows? Learning new things excites me. I devour books. I paint when nobody's looking. I crave success, but I'm far too impatient to wait for it. I love to drive. I love too much. I am tenacious. I cry far too easily. I'm a rough exterior on an easily pained interior. My heart has a lot of dents, cracks, and bruises. I beat my head against walls in an attempt to break them down. I don't get the hint. I don't understand myself. You probably won't understand me either. I'm irrational, but I search for the logic in things. I work my ass off. I have no free time, and when I do find a moment for myself, it's usually spent doing something for somebody else. I have a large ego that's very easily deflated. I generally do a good job of deflating said ego all by myself. I smoke Marlboro Lights, but I hate smoke in my face. I prefer reality TV, Discovery, NatGeo, and how-to programs over bullshit sitcoms. I like going out to clubs for the music, but I hate the scenes. Crowds terrify and excite me all at the same time. I've likely served hundreds of thousands of people while wenching, thanks to my overly-long tenure. When I get comfortable, I tend to grow stagnant. I like to build things with my hands, but don't trust myself with powertools. I like complicated things. I dream big. I'm creative, but have no faith in what I create. I'm a limelight seeker who hates to find it. I drink Jack and Cokes, Coors Light, Smirnoff Ice, and Vodka. I like the blue drinks. I subsist on Pepsi and Doritos. I'm allergic to alcohol, changes in temperature, and band-aids, but I still drink, weather the storms, and patch myself up when it's all said and done. I am a bundle of contradictions, wrapped up in a package of confusion. Love me, hate me, leave me. It's all the same to me anyway...
Livejournal: oneoftheabove
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All other information must be acquired directly from me...
If nothing's ventured,
nothing's gained
so I must seize the day.
And fighting time so hard I pray
that this moment lasts forever
. And will the world stay standing still, at least for me?
VNV Nation, Standing
its made up of lonely moments
there was always a moment there when i knew
you always gave installments
i always knew you concentrated and grew
and i believe in reinventions
do you believe that life is holding the clue
take away all the lonely moments
give me full communication with you
do you believe in reinvention?
do you believe that life is holding the clue?
anyway it defeats the silence...
anyway it defeats the pain that kills you
-Syntax, Pride
Among my own I was alone through my own doing.
All the years I walked unknown
behind the faces I assumed.
Give me time I will be clear.
Given time you'll understand
What possesses me to right what you have suffered.
There is no faith in which to hide.
Even truth is filled with lies.
I'm in this mood because of scorn.
I'm in a mood for total war.
I'd only come here seeking peace. I'd only come here seeking me.
It seems I came to leave.
VNV Nation, Darkangel
and you said
you would find me
even in death
and you said
and you said
you'd find me
but i can't see new york
as i'm, circling down
through white cloud
falling out
and i know
his lips are warm
but i can't seem
to find my way out
of this hunting ground...
Tori Amos, I Can't See New York
Dennis Collins, 9*17*47 - 1*27*2003
You know how much I love you Daddy...I miss you more than ever before.
