About Me
A Bio Of A Happy Band.We make music. We like it a lot. We make it very loud so that we are sure you can hear it too. We do this with instruments. We like them a lot, too. Some of them cost a lot of money, that’s how much we like them.
Sometimes we all get angry and yell at each other. This makes everybody sad, especially Matt. He’s happiest when he’s muttering stuff to himself, but when he’s mad he mutters REALLY hard. But then we remind him and ourselves that we have instruments and, something even more fun, amplifiers. So we use them and make a song and it makes us all happy again.Sometimes we make bad choices. Like the time Corissa decided to date that suburban Buddhist who wound up screaming at people for talking while he played guitar and later tried to throw people off of buildings. When stuff like that happens, sometimes Corissa lets her hormones really get the best of her. But then we remind her to write a song about it, and she does and we play it and it leaves us all feeling happy.Sometimes we get really nervous, too. Like the time we played at the Deep Fried Chicken Shack after none of us had slept for almost a week and there was someone back at home destroying the house, or one of the times Chris came to shows without parts of his drum set. Times like that is when Chris gets more nervous than you would think a person could. His eye starts to twitch real funny and he talks about stuff like “purveyors of Doom coming down to smite our righteous visage with the entanglements of bondage†and all this Old Testament sounding stuff. Then we just stare at him and he remembers that he has to make the beat so we can play a song, and that makes him happy, so we all are.Sometimes we get quiet. This happens a lot if a few of us are really angry with a few others. For some reason, when that happens Parker starts making noises that no human being should possibly be able to make. Sometimes there’s a rhythm to it, but usually not. The only real consistent factor is that his eyes bug out at times. This is good cause it helps him see the rest of us looking at him like we might hurt him. He doesn’t show it anymore, but he gets really scared, so he gets us to play a song, and then we’re all happy again.Sometimes we all get angry at other people, like the sound guy who left two songs into our set to go use cocaine that one time, or the guy who we let stay at our house after our show and then he said mean things about us on the net. When this happens you have to watch out for J-Guy, cause he gets REALLY mad, and he starts talking about this magic thing that only he understands. He calls it “Litigation†and he usually says it REALLY loud. But then one of us reminds him that he’d be happier playing bass than filing paper work, so we play a song and we’re all happy again. But it’s good to know he’s there.We work really really hard to make good songs so you can be happy like we are. It’s not always fun, and it’s rarely ever easy, but it’s what we do. And it’s what we’re going to keep on doing so that you know that whenever Corissa & The Priapists come to your town, you can come see us, have a great time, and go home with a smile on your face and a song in your heart. And fuck something.I edited my profile with Thomas' Myspace Editor V4.4
