I'm Jake Rockafeller and I'm the man.
I live in the sensuous jungles of South Africa, with my African-bong brothers. I own many leather-bound books, and my treehouse smells of rich mahogany. My days consist of usually one thing, P-Tag... she/he is my "bitch." That's all I have to say about that. Yes, now that the fact is out, I am indeed homosexual. Despite that, the ladies seem to love me as do the men. It feels like I never get a break from the attention.
In my spare time, I prance about leaving little presents in peoples slippers. I also collect milkbones, but not the teeth-staining orange ones. There is nothing more that I hate than fake people. Wouldn't you just love to have the nerve to state their name instead of subtly wanting to "cut that bitch you hate?" I know I sure would...
Well, that's plenty enough about me, now let's talk about you...
