Melanie

I'd like to meet:

Given the recent unusually disturbing content of my inbox and IM's, I feel it necessary to establish some guidelines:

1) If I can take the time to write my profile, you can take the time to read it before sending me a message. I'm married. It says so in my profile. Don't act all surprised. I am not looking to "hook up."

2) If you are a young male who feels the need to use the term "MILF" while communicating with me, then you are too young to be my friend. Don't waste your time or mine. We will not be hooking up.

3) Thanks for the left-handed compliment, but I am not "attractive, hot, a hottie for my age." I am "attractive, hot, a hottie." Leave it at that. Charm will get you everywhere. But we will still not be hooking up.

4) If you are a male in your twenties suffering from the delusion that I am somehow desperate to have sex with you: Get over yourself. I'm not. Sex didn't end for me the day I turned thirty. I have two kids to prove it. You and I will not be hooking up.

5) If you expect me to take you at your word regarding your "incredible hotness," and you don't post a pic. . . Are you kidding? And besides, I probably know your wife. . . You and I will not be hooking up.

6) If you are a sociopath, then you and I have probably already dated at some point in my lifetime. Move on. You and I will not be hooking up.

7) If you meet all of the above guidelines, but you are not John Cusack, understand that we will not be hooking up.

8) If you are offended by my guidelines, go ahead and waste your time sending me your tirade, but don't expect a response. I enjoy the god-like power of the "delete" button.

If you pass my screening, go ahead and send me a friend request or message. I'd love to hear from you.

Music:

Really and truly all over the map, but lately:

Elvis Costello: Tears, Tears, and More Tears and Nearer to You from The River in Reverse Album

and revisiting some fav's from my college days:

Elvis Costello's Album: Blood & Chocolate which contains the most raw, honest, dissonant and psychopathic love song ever written: I Want You

and his album: My Aim is True

Graham Parker's songs: Temporary Beauty and his cover of I Want You Back

Marshall Crenshaw's songs: Cynical Girl and There She Goes Again

Click here to visit www.dottunes.net

Movies:

Identity

Grosse Pointe Blank "I'm not a psychopath! Psychopaths kill for no reason. . . I kill for money!"

Say Anything: "I gave her my heart and she gave me a pen"

Television:

Buffy the Vampire Slayer ("She saved the world - a lot")

Books:

Gavin De Becker: The Gift of Fear and Other Survival Signals That Protect Us From Violence

Heroes:

Buffy Summers (of course!)