For being a wealthy young success story, I'm excessively modest, but only when I am talking about myself. I once tried selling food stamps on eBay for gambling money. I would rather spend Christmas at the Spearmint Rhino than with my family, not because I am creepy ,but because my grandma just doesn't give lap dances like she used to. I'll stab a guy. I believe in doing good deeds and keeping holy the sabbath; So on sundays I always find the time to cook half a pound of thick cut apple cured smoked bacon, find a homeless person, and eat it in front of him. My first dog was exactly like Lassie, except she was an alcoholic and died of liver disease, she taught me everything I know. I'll probably drunk dial you at four in the morning. After I die, I want to tie streamers to my limbs and have my body shot out of one of those human cannons at the circus, without telling the children that I was already dead, and miss the net. I don't trust people who don't drink. I have agenda for how much I hate planning ahead. I think all 30 year old men who still take Joe Corley Karate are hilarious. The average person is a procrastinator so don't feel bad,over achieving is what rich people do
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