Red Lipstick

Well about me..???... I've been known to save a bus of school children from plummeting over a bridge, as I'm painting with the other hand. I can do a quadruple axle in jeans with one skate, or scale up a mountain on a tricycle. On the weekends I fly to third world countries to build Churches and dig 14 wells with my bare hands. I can bake 4 wedding cakes in 2 Hours. I plant trees for all my neighbours which are farmers, using only an antique silver teaspoon. I catch fish with my bare hands and throw them up in the air so the seagulls can have A REAL MEAL. I like to repaint unsuspecting seniors homes plaid with a child's paint brush. I've hybrid eggplants to double as bowling balls. I once helped the Pope tie his shoe so he could finish brushing his teeth. I set up couples on blind dates even though they can't speak each others language... It works better that way!I have a lot of spare time to collect stamps and bottle caps to auction off for animal labour shortages in the middle east. I like to decorate miles of barbwire fences with ribbons, elastics and fruit. I'm a personal trainer to the stars and help them deal with their pickle addictions.