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This one time I was just walking around, and these outlaws started to chase me. So I jumped on a horse and ran while they shot at me. Eventually I ducked into a cave to get away. While in the cave some pirates came and found me, I guess it was their cave because they were pissed. They tied me up and made me walk the plank, and I don't know if you know this, but it is hard to swim when you're tied up. Luckily a mermaid came and rescued me, but then she told me I had to marry her. I told the mermaid that I would come back on Wednesday, which of course was a lie because I don't want to marry a mermaid. As I was walking away I fell into some quick sand. Fortunately a tribe of natives came along and pulled me out. As it turns out these natives happened to be cannibals, and started to prepare a fire to roast me. Before they could put me on the fire, Bigfoot came and scared them away. In case you didn't know, Bigfoot is naturally blurry. Unfortunatly Bigfoot had his own plans to eat me, but just before he could some aliens crashed nearby distracting Bigfoot long enough for me to get away. I ran to the nearest city only to find out that I didn't have enough money to get home. I ended up joining a gang of thieves in order to get the money to get back home, but then the Mob found out about the gang and did not approve. I told them they could probably find some treasure in that pirate cave I was in earlier, and they let me go, but as soon as I got away, I was stopped by the feds because of my dealings with the Mob. They decided to let me off with a warning and took me home. Boy were my parents pissed when I come home with the feds. I was grounded for a week, but it's cool since I never really do anything exciting anyways.
Erotic Thriller
You've made your own rules in life - and sometimes that catches up with you.
Winding a web of deceit comes naturally, and no one really knows the true you.
Your best movie matches: Swimming Pool, Unfaithful, The Crush If Your Life Was a Movie, What Genre Would It Be?
My Biography, written by "Scotty D":
Scott was born a long time ago, approximately seven minutes after the invention of air. His mother was a vampire eskimo leprechaun, and his father was a robot pirate ninja. As a boy, Scott's village was attacked by vigilante dinosaur zombies, and in order to escape, he had to sneak onto the ship of gorilla vikings. The vikings were furious when they discovered Scott on board, and forced him into slavery while at sea. Not willing to take orders, Scott grabbed his seat bottom coushin, which can also be used as a floatation device, and jumped overboard during the gorillas' nap time. While floating aimlessly at sea for several days, Scott eventually washed up on shore to the mystical island of Avalon. Scott wandered around the island searching for food and shelter, and eventually came across a secret warrior hero training camp, where he was captured, and held prisoner under the assumption that he was a threat to Avalon. After pleading his story, Scott was released, however, Scott decided he wanted to stay and become a warrior in order to retake his village, now under the control of the spider dragon parasites that defeated the vigilante dinosaur zombies. In order to be accepted to to the training camp Scott had to perform three tasks. First Scott had to ride around in a figure eight on a unicycle while juggling twelve flaming chainsaws and reciting the alphabet backwards in seventeen different languages. After completing the first task, Scott had to travel to Valhalla and obtain both Thor's hammer, and the Eye of Odin. Scott then had to conquer the South American samurai hippies. Finallly Scott was admitted to the training camp where he trained with King Arthur, Hercules, and Optimus Prime. Scott trainined rigorously for the next few decades to become the champion that could not only retake control of his village, which was now in the hands of the electric doughnut monsters, but also defend it from future invasions. Upon graduation, the heroes said their goodbyes and then they were off. King Arthur returned to Camelot, Hercules to Mt. Olympus, and Optimus Prime to Cybertron. While returning to his village, Scott helped defend a clan of nomad magicians from some mystical sandmonkeyes, and in return was offered help in his conquest to retake his village from the toxic wearwolf wizards that now had control. Scott led the nomads into an epic battle from beyond time, where Scott proved his skills and triumphed over the unsuspecting wizards. The battle was not without casualties however, as the wizard king, before dying, cast a spell, freezing Scott in time and space until four baby polar bears slid down a rainbow into a pot of gold. The tribe of nomad magicians tried their best to break the spell, but it was no use. Scott remained frozen for several thousands of years until finally four baby polar bears slid down a rainbow into a pot of gold. By this time his village was no more, and Scott traveled the world helping all who needed it. To this day, Scott still travels the world helping all those who need it. He has made many amazing friends and powerful enemies in his legendary journies, fighting for his purpose, and going only where he is needed.
